


relax your mind, take your time on me

by bradfordbuttfuck



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bottom Niall, Bottom Zayn, Croke Park - Dublin, Fluff and Angst, Friends With Benefits, Grinding, I ain't pleased with the beginning but it gets better haha, M/M, Niall centric-ish ??, Niall's just a really big fan, OT5 Friendship, Possibly Unrequited Love, Riding, Shameless Smut, Sharing a Bed, Smut, They fuck quite a bit, Top Niall (minimal), Top Zayn, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, bUT ITS MINIMAL THEY DID IT FOR A SPECIAL OCCASION OKAY, fanboy!niall, heavy questioning of one's feelings, niall and harry flirt a lot, then he meets Zayn, ziall centric i guess, zourriam are famous and in a boyband
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-23
Updated: 2014-12-23
Packaged: 2018-03-02 06:06:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 43,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2802266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bradfordbuttfuck/pseuds/bradfordbuttfuck
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>Zayn sits up, scoots closer so they’re sitting cross legged in front of each other. Niall thinks he’s about to spill but then he shakes his head and crinkles his nose in a playful smile. “Nahh,”</em>
</p>
<p>  <em>The blond frowns. “Why not?”</em></p>
<p>  <em>“We don’t know each other’s names! We can’t share secrets yet.” He pauses. “But I bet you already know mine.”</em></p>
<p>  <em>It's a little cocky but he’s right. Still, Niall pretends he doesn’t. “Actually, I don’t.” He smirks, blue eyes lit afire as he lets his usual cheeky side slip.</em></p>
<p>  <em>The darker male pouts excessively. “Aww, really? That’s a pity.” He stretches his arm out, the white shirt he has on riding up, allowing Niall a glimpse of the tattoos on his hips. “You’ll be needing it for later.”</em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>(Or the one where Niall’s a bootycall, Zayn’s kind of an asshole but everyone ships the fuck out of them anyway.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	relax your mind, take your time on me

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't posted anything in months so I hope y'all enjoy this bad boy because it's hella long and I put all my blood, sweat and tears in it. Not really, but I worked hard, so love it plez
> 
> Special thanks to Kashaf for proof-reading and correcting my lame ass tenses. Teamwork bruhh.
> 
> OH, and I made up all the twitter names but if you see one that's yours or someone else's and you don't want me using it, please inform me and I'll remove it :)

 

Niall initially wanted to jump up and down and squeal but then he thought to himself _no_ , he isn’t like that. He is a mature, nineteen-year-old university student. Squealing isn’t his thing. 

But he _is_ like that, is the problem, and he finds himself doing it anyway because fuck it. 

His mother comes rushing in with a spatula in her hand, looking fierce and ready as she raises her arm up only to lower it disappointedly when she sees her son excitedly jumping on the bed, his laptop open and Maura knows what’s up as soon as she sees the _One Direction_ logo on the screen. 

She sighs, frustrated, “Sweetheart, get down from there. I don’t want to have to send your father away to get you another bed again.” 

“I got tickets to _One Direction_ , Ma!” He yells, landing on his bum and grabbing her shoulders with a huge smile on his face. “I’m gonna see them in Dublin, Ma, fuckin’ _Croke Park_ , baby!” He shakes her roughly before backing away, jumping and yelping when his mother slaps his ass with the spatula. “Well that’s wonderful, Niall, but please. Do _not_ curse in this house!” 

Niall nods and runs to the window, opening it and screaming, “I’M GONNA GO FUCKING SEE ONE DIRECTION!” Once it's out of his mouth, his mother shoots him a disapproving glare. Niall only shrugs. “You said in this house, me head was out the window.” 

Maura narrows her eyes at him. “Don’t make me burn that ticket once it gets here, Nialler.” The blond’s face falls, eyes growing wide with hurt. “You wouldn’t _dare_.”

Maura smirks and nonchalantly raises her shoulders. “Have you got transportation and hotels sorted?”

Niall grins wide, nodding. “Dad’s going to drive me and I’m staying at…the Fitzwilliam.” He finishes innocently, smiling and batting his lashes.

 His mother's face pales. “Drive you?! Fitzwilliam?!” Maura splutters. “It’s a fifty-four minute drive and that hotel costs thousands, Niall, _thousands_!How did you pay for this?” 

The blond gulps, reaching under his pillow and handing her back her credit card. Maura gapes at him.

 

“ _NIALL JAMES HORAN!_ ”

 

––

 

After much persuasion, Niall manages to convince his mother that he was always planning on paying her back. How exactly, he still doesn’t know. It’s only a few hundred for the stay and the Fitzwilliam is pretty spiffy, but Niall decided that if he was going to get told off for buying tickets (for all three gigs, he might add), he might as well splash out on a luxurious hotel room as well. He’s a responsible, nineteen year old lad who can handle being by himself. So why not? 

It’s pretty sad going to a concert by himself though, but he figures he might meet up with a few people on twitter. He doesn’t have a lot of followers, just a thousand, but he knows that a lot of people adore him for some reason – and he suspects it’s because he’s gay, which is a stupid reason, if he’s being honest. He's lived his life being the goal of every straight girl, so many females inviting him to go shopping when really he still doesn’t give a shit what they wear or who they’re dating; all he needs is wifi, warmth and One Direction. And food. 

He’s booked himself a room starting the night before the first concert and he’s pretty freaking excited. He wishes someone would go with him but he amuses himself enough to not have friends so he's good. Besides, who needs friends when you can talk to the ones you have on the internet?

 

––

 

When the tickets are delivered the year after, Niall sprints out onto his garden and does roly polies all over the place, almost getting run over when he skips across the driveway by his _own father_ , who stares at him in utter humiliation as the neighbours exit their houses to see what all the commotion is about. 

Niall smiles sheepishly as he awkwardly pads back to his house, his father in tow as he begrudgingly covers his half-naked son.

 

Their neighbours don't talk to them at all after that.

 

––

 

It’s the night before the concert and Niall’s raring to go. He excitedly hops towards the car, fully loaded with gas (Niall made sure, multiple times). The blond is wide awake and ready, practically vibrating with excitement. He has his suitcase in his hand, tickets stuffed _safely_ into the pockets amongst his other clothes and needs. He’s been waiting for today for a whole fucking year and he isn’t going to let anybody ruin it; not the weather, not the traffic, and not even other fans who push him away from the stage because he will literally push them back _harder_.

 

Probably not, but he will shout in their faces, no doubt about that.

 

“You ready, son?” His dad questions, turning to look over his shoulder to face Niall. (The blond chose to sit at the back so he could ‘keep his possessions safe’). Bobby didn’t really understand why but now he can tell by the way Niall doesn’t reply, his blue eyes glued to his phone screen, that he is just supposedly protecting his tickets, what with his arm stretched out to keep the suitcase from falling off of the seat. He’s going to extreme lengths to make sure those tickets don’t even have so much as a dent in them by the time they got there.

“Ugh, who you texting?” Bobby mumbles. 

Niall’s head snaps up at that, eyebrows furrowed as he snorts at his father. “Texting? Dad, I’m on twitter.” 

“Right.” Bobby sighs, turns to face the wheel as he turns his keys in the ignition. “You can sit in the front, y’know? Don’t have to hold yer’hand out like that.” 

“It might fall off…” The boy pouts.

“We’re going to Croker, Niall. We’re not traveling across the sea. It isn’t a bumpy ride.” Bobby tries to reason but it seems Niall is persistent in staying, blue eyes wide as he shakes his head. It appears that his son hasn’t changed, that irresistible pout never losing it's charm on him, or anyone. 

“You can put a seatbelt around it?” He tries again and the boy seems to agree, smiling as he lifts the baggage up and secures the belt around it, clicking it into place and then looking at his father expectantly. “What?” His dad asks. 

“Aren’t you going to start the car?” 

Bobby lets out another breath, turning himself back around to face the front before pulling out of their driveway.

 

––

 

Once they arrive at the hotel, Bobby seems all too hesitant in leaving his baby boy alone in such a fancy place. He frowns as he sees his son excitedly jump and down on the balls of his feet, a smile on his face that makes Bobby’s lips twitch just slightly. 

“Do you know where t’go?” He questions from his open car window. Niall nods his head and points over to the desk. “D’ya know where Croker is?” Niall rolls his eyes and nods his head again. “Da, we’ve been here before to watch the rams, remember?” 

“But that was so long ago.” 

“I still remember.” Bobby doesn’t look convinced. 

“Don’t worry about me.” Niall assures him, leaning down to hug his father and kiss him goodbye through his window. He chuckles fondly at the defeated sigh his dad gives and stands back up. 

“I’ll be safe, okay?” He turns around and jogs into the hotel, shouting an “I love you!” to his dad as he disappears inside. Bobby breathes an “I love you too” but it doesn’t make it into Niall’s ears. 

 

––

 

First thing Niall does once he’s inside is tweet.

 

**@craicalaic:** _Guess where i am ? DUBLIN!_

**@craicalaic:** _Croker here i comeee !!!!!_

 

The main lounge is huge and fancy, people with briefcases strolling around while he stands there in a green snapback and a wide smile on his face. It’s the 22nd of May and his first concert is tomorrow, giving him time to get comfortable and have a good night’s sleep (which he honestly doubts he would get but he’s thinking he can if he tries hard enough). 

He gets the card for his room after checking up on the boys’ profiles, silently debating whether he should have a look around. He wants to sleep, perhaps roll around in his king-sized bed, but he also wants to check out the food downstairs, and a swimming pool if they had one. If this hotel is really five stars, it better fucking have a theme park behind it or Niall wants his money back. 

He gets to his room and plugs in the charger for his phone – after face planting the bed of course, which smells like roses and vanilla. Niall doesn’t do much for an hour or two, just sits inside his room and opens up his laptop (wifi isn’t free, sorry mum). He scrolls through his timeline to pass the time and completely forgets about his parents, who he promised he’d text once he was in his room.

  

**@craicalaic:** _I’m at my hotel now !! Bored as fuck haha_

**@craicalaic: _@zaynmalik_** _why are you socialising with mortals_

**@craicalaic:** _harry styles gives 0 fucks he will flash his nipples without a care_

**@craicalaic: _@Real_Liam_Payne_** _hi daddy_

**@craicalaic:** _oMG I LOVE ONE DIRECTION_

**@craicalaic:** _Today is a special day !! ;)_

**@craicalaic: _@Louis_Tomlinson_** _you legend ! Hahah!_

**@craicalaic: _@zaynmalik_** _eat my ass_

**@craicalaic:** _Louis is my king_

**@craicalaic: _@zaynmalik_** _fuck my asshole with your monster cock hahah no homo !!!!_  

 

His account isn’t bad—a decent layout—with girls mostly admiring him for his shameless thirst for Zayn Malik. He loves the other boys as well, but everyone has a favourite, and Zayn somehow managed to squeeze himself into Niall's heart (and every other fibre of his being) from day one. They seem to be nothing like each other, from what Niall knows about him, but that's exactly what he likes. He may not have a big interest in comic books or R&B, but Niall couldn’t help but fall in love with Zayn and his sarcasm and secretly sassy attitude; how he does things away from the spotlight and comes out of his hideout looking as perfect as ever. And it’s difficult, because the rest of the earth's population loves Zayn too but y'know, those are the struggles of being a fan. 

He lets out a deep sigh, favouriting one last tweet before locking his phone and standing up. He strips naked, wanting a nice bath after that one hour car ride because he can feel the sweat beginning to build in every crevice of his body. He's also feeling a little _in the mood_ , but he tells himself that wanking in a five-star hotel is not classy at all so he frowns, sinking down into the hot water he filled inside the white tub. 

"Holy fuck," he moans aloud; this is _sensational_. He suddenly wishes he had flower petals to scatter above the water. 

After Niall convinces himself to get out of the tub before his limbs prune up and he dies (in a five star hotel. Not classy), he gets dried up and pulls on a new set of clothes—a jumper on his back and some jeans—because he isn’t going anywhere fancy; just downstairs to the pub, if he decides to have a pint after he explores. 

He's a little overwhelmed when he gets down the elevator and there's some, about five, excited looking girls lingering around the lounge. He walks past them and coughs awkwardly at the strong smell of _Our Moment_. 

Niall pushes them to the back of his mind and goes exploring, asking the staff random questions like _do you have a pool?_ And _how big are your food portions?_ And of course, _why doesn't this place have a roller coaster?_ which results in concerned Fitzwilliam workers asking him how old he is, to which he replies with a "Excuse me? I'm _nineteen_." Niall has to hold back the "bitch" that slowly threatens to form at his lips at the end of the sentence. 

He decides to put an end to his exploring after that, pouting as he makes his way back to the lobby but it drops from his face at the sight of not just five, but over thirty girls (and a few boys) there.

There are security guards blocking the elevators and the stairs, some hotel workers trying to control the ecstatic mob, but they stay lively and loud. 

It's when he's watching the commotion and hears one girl shouting "Harry!" pretty fucking enthusiastically that he begins to get curious. He assures himself he's hallucinating. Harry _is_ a common name after all. 

He stops outside of the circle and watches as the girls are ushered outside where, much to Niall's surprise, a larger group of people wait. There’s about a hundred or so that he can see but if he hears correctly, there's probably more. 

Okay. There’s a group of girls outside his hotel shouting for 'Harry'. No biggie. 

A security guard standing beside the elevator gives him an apologetic smile as Niall presses the button for the elevator to come down. Once the doors open, Niall can't help but ask after steps inside. "Excuse me, who are all those girls waiting for?" 

The man opens his mouth then closes it, looking uncertain. Niall notices that the doors are slowly beginning to close and he's not sure if he was going to get an answer, but he does, the guard breathlessly laughing out a "Just a boyband” as the golden blocks obstruct Niall's view of the crowded outside of the hotel. 

The blond feels the pace of his heart accelerate, throat going dry as his eyes go wide.

 

They're _here_.

_They_ are _here_.

 

Niall stares at the panel beside the doors, practically glaring at them. He doesn't know which floor they're on, but using logic, Niall guesses that they must be somewhere near the top floor, for security and shit. He feels guilty for even thinking about it and he knows there's a chance of him getting kicked out but he figures that he’s innocent looking enough. Surely nobody will expect him of doing such things, right? The blond shrugs. There are eighteen floors all together, where else could they be? 

He shrugs, pressing the seventeenth floor button and nervously biting his lip as the cart starts to move. He wants to meet them, hell yeah, probably even tell them that they made his life so much better and taught him how to smile wider every day. He doesn’t have an amazing story to tell, or an illness that they helped him through – the band just makes him really happy, and for that he is grateful. The possibility of coming in contact with them is amazing and Niall would probably get the date tattooed on his arse despite it being a pretty squishy surface. They might not even be up there but Niall's willing to take the risk. 

The doors open and his eyes widen at the beige wall he’s facing. He peeks his head out and gasps as he sees a security guard walking down the lit hallway and coming to face him. Niall takes a step out just before the doors shut, swallowing thickly. Oh _great_ , he’s going to jail. 

“Oh, sorry sir," The man approaches him. "This floor is off limits to the public.” 

Niall nods but he can’t stop himself from laughing (awkwardly) because the man sounds like he’s from a spy movie. It’s also quite funny because this is the first time he was going to do something rebellious and he got caught before he even started. “Sorry, I didn’t know.” He smiles sheepishly. “Kinda forgot where my room was.” 

The man gives him a disapproving look which Niall flushes at. God, the man probably thinks he’s nothing but another no good teenager. Fantastic.

“That’s okay, sir.” The man laughs kindly—kindly?—, eyes bright as he scratches the back of his head. Niall eyes the bulging muscles on his arms. He isn’t checking him out or anything; he’s just genuinely wondering if his arms are the same size as his head. 

“I’m sure you can just check your card.” The guard chuckles. 

Niall's about to answer but then a head peers from around the corner and his throat dries the fuck up. The guard doesn’t notice, but Niall does.

 

Niall notices _so hard_.

 

He knows that face anywhere. If Niall got a pound for every time he thought of that face, he’d have exactly one pound because that face never, _never_ leaves his mind. Holy shit, he curses mentally, it’s Zayn _fucking_ Malik. 

The blond gulps, internally sweating bullets as he pats around his pants for any sign of the plastic rectangle in his pockets. He feels the heat in his cheeks deepen at the sign of the smirk on _his_ face as _he_ comes around fully to rest _his_ shoulder on the wall, arms crossed. He’s watching them.

 

Oh _fuck_.

 

“Um,” Niall gulps. Again. “I think I left my keycard in my room.” 

The guard’s smile drops, Niall looking as reckless as ever while the muscular man continues to scratch at his head. The blond doesn’t really pay attention because Zayn is standing, like, five feet away and Niall always thought this moment was going to be a little more…not like this. Niall can’t help but stare. 

“Ugh, sorry. Don’t think I can help you with that.” The large man walks over to the elevator and presses the button.

Niall pouts automatically; he doesn't want to leave. Not like this. “Maybe you can ask the receptionist for help?” 

“Wait, Preston,” The guard looks over his shoulder and sees Zayn standing there, his eyebrows furrowing. “What you doing here? Go back to your room, I’m just trying to get this lad some help.” 

_The fuck is that supposed to mean_ , Niall thinks. 

“No, don’t. I’m expecting him.” His voice is so silky, it reminds Niall of chocolate. Smooth, silky, milk chocolate. _Jesus_. “He’s with me.”

 

Wait. 

_Whaaaat_.

 

Niall gapes at the singer in shock but quickly closes his mouth once the guard – Preston, he reminds himself – shoots him a suspicious look. He waves awkwardly at him and smiles, not having anything to say because his vocal chords refuse to emit sound unless it’s “Oh my god, I love you Zayn”. And judging by his current predicament, those are the wrong words right now. 

The guard looks unconvinced but Zayn squeezes the man's shoulder and smiles a nice crinkly smile (that Niall internally swoons at). “C’mon, mate. I’ll take him with me and you,” he gestures to the guard, poking his bicep, “can sort out Liam’s issue with his phone. The fans are calling him again and the poor lad wants to sleep.” He chuckles. 

Niall can’t fight the smile on his face as he stares at Zayn, who is a real human being. He isn’t fake, he isn’t a hologram, he is a living, breathing and beautiful human. (Niall _is_ quite upset because how exactly is he real? Those cheekbones were carved by gods or some shit). 

“Is he...” Preston's voice snaps Niall out of his reverie, the man’s eyes scanning him up and down and Zayn looks hesitant, but then their eyes meet and he nods. 

“Yeah, he is. Head over to Liam’s room so I can handle Irish over here, okay? It’s almost midnight, mate.” 

The blond’s eyes widen. _It’s that late already?_  

“Right,” Preston nods. “But like you said, it’s almost midnight, so y’know, don’t be… _loud_.” 

Niall furrows his brows. Again, what the fuck is that supposed to mean. 

Zayn huffs out a laugh. “Management bought three floors of this building, I’m sure nobody will mind.” He pats him on the back before the man bobs his head one last time and turns the corner, Niall assumes to where Liam’s room is. 

The two are left in silence and Niall feels as if he was a piece of meat on display, Zayn’s gaze being just as intense as he always thought it would be. The blond presses his lips together awkwardly in a tight smile, his blush slowly fading away from his pale skin as Zayn moves next to him. 

“Hello,” was the only thing Niall was able to muster before Zayn chuckled and swayed his head over towards the rooms. “Follow me.” 

Niall nervously gnaws at his lip as he stares down the long hallway, a few guards here and there with radios on their shoulders to communicate. Frankly, Niall is scared; watching Zayn greet all these big, burly men as he passes room after room is quite intimidating. Niall also feels a little star-struck when Zayn gets stopped by Paul along the way. 

“Who’s this?” The man asks, but Niall doesn’t hear the answer because Zayn pulls him down to whisper it in his ear. 

 

He never gets to figure out what Zayn said to Paul.

 

They stop at an ordinary looking door which Zayn opens with his keycard. He casually walks in, stripping the blue denim layer off and casually throwing it onto the floor along with his keycard. Niall’s pleased with his messiness, glad that Zayn is just a normal lad like him. 

“Make yourself comfortable.” He smiles, crawling onto his bed and seating himself in the middle before turning the tv on and aimlessly scrolling through the channels. Niall doesn’t get comfortable, doesn’t know _how_ , as he awkwardly stands at the doorway for a few seconds but then decides that this is a once in a lifetime opportunity so he places himself on the edge of the bed – _Zayn’s_ bed – and watches the news. 

“So was that story about your keycard true? Or was it a load of bull?” 

Niall laughs quietly, understanding how completely ridiculous it sounds but if Zayn knew him well enough, Zayn would know that that was a completely _Niall_ thing to do. 

“It’s true, actually,” Niall turns to look at him but he ends up just playing with the sheets as he nodded. “I locked me keycard in m'room so I could explore the hotel. My first time at a place like this, so wanted to see if they had a pool and shit.” He laughs but it falters too soon because Zayn’s eyeing him again before he speaks his reply. 

“Okay.” He says, short and simple. 

Niall can’t help but ask, “What did the guard mean by us not being too loud?” He feels like he already knows the answer but he also feels that maybe the reason why he’s thinking that is due to the many fantasies he’s had. Seeing Zayn in person makes Niall question whether his brain’s working correctly or not. 

The darker lad merely laughs, airy and light with amusement. He rests the tv remote onto the nightstand and looks straight at Niall with a lazy smirk. “Do you really wanna know?” He says with an arched brow. 

“Yes.” Niall says all too eagerly before he’s clearing his throat in attempt to redo his response. “I mean yeah, yeah…I do.” 

Zayn sits up, scoots closer so they’re sitting cross legged in front of each other. Niall thinks he’s about to spill but then he shakes his head and crinkles his nose in a playful smile. “Nahh,” 

The blond frowns. “Why not?” 

“We don’t know each other’s names! We can’t share secrets yet.” He pauses. “But I bet you already know mine.” 

It's a little cocky but he’s right. Still, Niall pretends he doesn’t. “Actually, I don’t.” He smirks, blue eyes lit afire as he lets his usual cheeky side slip. 

The darker male pouts excessively. “Aww, really? That’s a pity.” He stretches his arm out, the white shirt he has on riding up, allowing Niall a glimpse of the tattoos on his hips. “You’ll be needing it for later.” 

The blond goes wide eyed and gulps, paling completely. 

“So what’s your name?” He lies back down but towards the other side of the bed and unless Niall is mistaken, Zayn wants him to lay down with him. 

“Niall.” He says quietly, earning a “Zayn” that is just as quiet. 

Niall scoots back so his bum is next to Zayn’s but he doesn’t rest his back against the headboard. There’s an imaginary boundary in between them, and Niall isn’t ready to get thrown out because he went over said boundary. The two keep their eyes trained on the tv, continuing on with their conversation. “So tell me about what those guards meant?” Niall questions bravely. 

"Why don't you lay down?" 

"Stop changing the subject." The blond huffs but does so anyway, turning on his side with his face against the pillow while he stares at Zayn. Though they've only met like five minutes ago, Niall can't help but feel quite comfortable laying there next to him. They don’t touch though, a thin imaginary wall keeping them from making any physical contact. 

"How old are you, Niall?" The blond rolls his eyes, giving up and staring at the tv, which has nothing interesting on it. "I'm nineteen. What about you?" he adds, even though he knows the exact date (and time) the older boy was born. 

"Twenty-one,” Zayn says. "You go to uni?" 

Niall grins. "Yep." 

"What do you study?" 

"Music." Zayn's head snaps to face him at that, eyes alight with interest. "Really?" Niall nods and it's the end of that. 

"What do you in your free time?" 

Niall feels like he's filling out a survey. "Um…" he thinks for a moment "I like to read." _Fanfiction_ , his head supplies but he misses that part out. "Play on my guitar, football..." He doesn't really know what else to say without letting his usual idiotic self out, the same idiotic self that makes people laugh and he’s confident with. Strangely, Niall can't feel confident with Zayn next to him. He feels so exposed, like he has been stripped nude. Which in every other dream Niall's had he totally wouldn't mind, but now that he's with Zayn in real life, he can't afford to make a fool out of himself. He has to have chill. 

"Nice." Zayn smiles and Niall turns to him, noticing the stubble littering his jaw and cheekbones. The blond takes his time to admire Zayn's profile before the moment ends, his heart still pounding like a hammer in his chest. 

"So what you doing in a five star hotel, Niall?" 

"Ugh, well..." Fuck. "I was, um…v-visiting a relative." He smiles; nailed it. 

"You were visiting a relative?" 

Niall can feel the hidden 'in a five star hotel?' in there but nods anyway. "Yes." 

Zayn hums. "Where are you usually from?" 

"Mullingar,” And just like that, as if a flood has been opened in his mouth, questions spill out of Niall’s mouth quicker than he can say _fucking shit stop_. “Can you tell me what those guards were saying now? What did you whisper in Paul's ear? How come you don't get fans calling you?" 

Zayn looks taken aback at all the questions and Niall is about two seconds from running away, humiliated, but then the darker boy laughs, hearty and high pitched and the blond fondly smiles.

"I don't get fans calling me because I'm smart enough to disconnect my phone from the wall. I just plug it in if I want room service.” His laughter fades, eyes suddenly turning a more darker shade. “Now, I'll tell you the answer to the first two after you answer me one more question." The smile on his face slipping into a smirk and Niall notices the small lean Zayn gives, hazel eyes trained on the younger's lips. "You straight?"

 

Blue eyes fall onto Zayn's mouth and Niall wets his own, shaking his head. "Not really." 

Zayn smirks at that. "Perfect."

 

Before Niall knows it, Zayn closes the space between them to press their lips together. It catches the blond off guard and he freezes, eyes wide as the darker male carefully holds his hip with his left hand, Zayn's right arm being used to prop himself up. How frozen Niall is was nothing to be laughed at; his body stiffening at the lips attached to his. He’s hyper aware of how much he’s going to regret this in the near future, but when a practical _greek god_ lays his lips on you, don’t be surprised when you go into shock. 

It’s only at the swipe of Zayn's tongue that Niall's eyes flutter shut, pleasure defeating him as he melts into the older boy, moving his mouth in accordance to Zayn's while cupping his cheek with his right palm. Niall brushes his thumb over the stubble on his jaw and moans into his mouth, lightly grazing their tongues together as he pushes Zayn back onto the mattress. 

An appreciative hum rumbles from the back of Zayn's throat, Niall's legs swinging over the older lad’s as he straddles his hips, arms resting on either side of the other's head as he zealously kisses the man of everyone's fantasy. 

It seems like all focus is aimed on pleasuring one another because the rest is a blur after their clothed erections brush together harshly, moans rushing out of each other's mouths. Niall's brows furrow together as he ruts himself against Zayn's thigh, whining into his neck. He can feel Zayn's hands slip into his boxers, grabbing hold of his ass and kneading it with his large palms. The blond keens for more, allowing the older to pull both his jeans and boxers over his bum after they kick their shoes off the bed. 

Niall knows somewhere in the back of his mind that this isn’t the right thing to do; that everyone will be against what they're doing right now and Niall can immediately name three people on that long list.

 

His mum, his dad, and worst of all, Zayn's _fans_.

 

God, Niall's seen them mad. He's witnessed the heartbreak, the tears of some girls (and boys) who's seen videos, articles and rumours about the boys and "groupies". Niall's even been a part of the angry group of fans that refused to believe that Zayn’s slept with anyone apart from Perrie, his fiancée, whom he has no chemistry with.

 

Niall freezes in Zayn's arms. Fuck. 

Zayn has a _fiancée_.

 

The band member spins them around and continues to suck along Niall's neck, removing his shirt and jeans in the process as well as his boxers and the jumper that remained on Niall's body. The only article of clothing they have on being their socks, which Zayn quickly pulls off, jerking his aching cock all the while. Niall watches, still frozen in place, and then, as if a switch has been flicked, props himself on his elbows, panting with his face flushed; his mouth salivating in awe at the eight incher (give or take a few; Niall’s not a mathematician) in his fist. He doesn’t find it in him to stop Zayn’s ministrations—he’s fucking selfish, sue him—but as soon as Zayn dribbles lubricant on his fingers, Niall stops him, sitting up and wrapping his fingers around his wrist. 

Zayn looks annoyed, his eyes hooded but dark. “What?” 

“You…” Niall gulps, trying to push the delicious thoughts of Zayn working his fingers inside of him out of his mind. “You have a fiancée, Zayn. I-I can’t–” 

He’s cut off by a kiss, a hand pressing him down back onto the mattress before Niall’s arms curl around Zayn’s neck, succumbing once more into his arousal. Zayn pulls away with one final peck, lazily smiling and cupping his cheek. “Trust me, yeah?” 

The blond’s apprehensive, but he nods twice, wanting this just as much as he does. Zayn senses his hesitation and pulls away, worriedly biting his lip. “Still wanna do this?” Niall flushes deeper, smiling wide at the fact that Zayn was kind enough to ask for his consent. “Yeah, I do.” 

Zayn presses another kiss to his temple before pressing the first finger in. Of course, Niall’s done this to himself before – to the thought of Zayn – but the fact that the guy that he’s been fantasising about doing this with is actually doing it to him, right here and right now, is overwhelming. The blond hums in content, brings Zayn closer to him in a, hopefully, not desperate seeming way. Which kind of falters his pleasure for a moment, and he nudges Zayn away in fear that the older would think he is desperate for his cock. He is, but he doesn’t want Zayn to think that. Even though he is. He _so_ is. 

Zayn smirks, obviously knowing what Niall was thinking about. He lowers his mouth to his ear, taking the lobe into his mouth and lightly sucking on it before licking at the column of his neck. “It’s okay to want something you’re not allowed to have.” 

Niall pouts as his fingers leave him, and he feels so, _so_ empty. "I'm not allowed to have it?" 

Zayn chuckles, "You are." He nods, ripping the condom packet with his teeth and rolling it on himself. "You just have to beg first." He uncaps the lube and once again pours a decent amount onto his dick, slicking his member up while Niall watches with a hungry gaze. 

"Please?" He weakly croaks. 

"You're going to have to do more than that, babe." He leans down, latching his mouth onto Niall's collarbone and sucking harshly at his skin. The blond lets out a broken cry, his nails clutching onto Zayn and causing angry red lines to form on the muscular expanse of his back. 

"Zayn, please just…" He knows the words to say, he just doesn't want this to be another dream where he wakes up, his pants as stained as his bedsheets. 

"Please what, Niall?" He purrs huskily, tip pressing onto the ring of his hole. Zayn runs a hand through his hair, the blond panting already as he nods wildly, sweat building up on his forehead. "Do it, Zayn. Do it." 

He feels the lips against his jaw tug up into a smirk, tutting disappointedly. "Do what, Niall?"

 

"Fuck me."

 

It comes out with such animosity that Zayn's eyes widen, surprised but pleased with the answer. Niall smiles sheepishly.

 

"Please?"

 

—

 

Niall has now figured out what the guards had meant by needing to keep quiet.

 

He doesn’t, though. How can he when Zayn is rocking his world off its hinges? With every slam against his prostate, Niall lets out a louder scream, clutching tightly onto Zayn. He cries out in complete pleasure as the older delves his throbbing cock right inside of him, burying himself to the hilt. It has reached midnight but the two go on for longer, Niall switching their positions to gain better access to his prostate as he sinks down on Zayn’s dick. 

In that stance, Niall could feel the cock go even deeper, his legs quivering as Zayn continues to ram himself inside of him, releasing some deep groans himself but they don’t quite compare to the unrestricted shouts Niall’s emitting. Zayn doesn’t seem to mind though, quite liking how loud the blond is and it merely heightens his pleasure, wanting to see the younger lad fall apart. 

Zayn delivers one particularly hard slam up into Niall which causes the blond to collapse onto his chest, struggling to keep himself up any longer due to the gratification that is too overwhelming to bear. Niall whines as he wrapped his fingers around his cock, pumping while Zayn firmly holds his hips. 

The older lad is nearing his edge, and judging from what he can see, Niall is too. It isn’t that difficult to tell; anybody can see it, what with the way Niall is practically shaking with immense satisfaction. The blond continues to pump his aching member vigorously, thumbing the head. 

“Z-Zayn, faster, please.” He begs. “Fuck me, c'mon.” 

He isn’t sure Zayn is even capable of such a speed, Niall seeing nothing but a tanned blur ramming into him, the headboard slamming against the wall and the blond briefly feels sorry for whoever was on the other side, hoping they aren’t keeping them awake. His thoughts quickly return to his current condition, though and he keens brokenly into Zayn’s throat, clinging tightly onto him and wanting nothing but to come. 

And he does. He comes all over Zayn’s chest and his stomach, painting the both of them hot white with his load. His back relaxes from it’s previously arched state and he curls into himself a little, shuddering out a hiss as Zayn pulls out of him, coming into the condom just seconds after. 

They stay in the same position they were in once they’re finished, huddled together with Niall on top of Zayn, legs either side of his waist with his arms around Zayn’s neck as if he’s scared to let go. (He is). 

He ends up, out of fear, letting go shyly, blinking blearily at the other boy who simply gives him a languid, pleased smile. Niall looks around the room and sees all their clothes on the floor, the bedsheets a total mess and he notices a squeak in the mattress when he sits up that he knows wasn’t there before. He gapes a little, as if he’s just waking up from being unconscious. 

“Have fun up there?” Zayn grins and Niall’s left to playfully glare at him, his smile widening as he blushes and lifts himself off from Zayn’s lap. 

“Sorry for the mess.” He apologises feebly, turning to sit by Zayn’s side but ends up wincing at the pain in his lower back. Niall’s cheeks puff out in a tired breath; if it hurts now, it’s gonna hurt even more tomorrow. 

“It’s okay.” 

Niall lays down beside him, and yet again, the invisible wall is placed in between them, the two not touching. Niall wants to get up but he was too tired, his bum burning and his legs sore. He shoots Zayn a grateful smile when he stands up to throw the used condom in the bin, grabbing a cloth to clean the blond up. Then they rest, still naked, Niall seeming more tired than Zayn is. 

“So you really locked the card into your room?” 

Niall’s eyes are closed when he replies, half-sleeping on his side. “Yeah.” 

“I’d usually tell people to leave, but considering you’ve nowhere to go and the current wreck your arse is right now,” he pats Niall’s bum, at which the blond whines tiredly. “I’ll let you stay.” 

Niall smiles, staring longingly once again at the man’s profile. “Thanks.” 

Zayn shrugs, pulling the sheet over himself and staring at the ceiling. “It’s no big deal.” 

Bravely, Niall shuffles closer to him, Zayn eyeing him discreetly but not protesting against it. “That’s very kind of you.” Zayn throws him a small half-smile, closing his eyes and turning so his back was facing Niall. “I guess."

 

––

 

Niall wakes up at what seems like the ass crack of dawn, his eyes squeezed shut at the sight of sunlight seeping through the open window. The blond groans, burying his face in the pillow. He doesn’t remember leaving the curtains open. 

There’s footsteps and the sound of rushing water, though and that certainly causes Niall’s head to pop up. He turns around, quickly realising he’s naked when he sees his legs all tangled up in the sheets, along with a few bruises on his hips and a love bite on his chest. 

“Hey,” Blue eyes cast towards the beautiful man dressed in only jeans standing at the foot of the bed, a toothbrush in his mouth as he blinks tiredly at the blond in his sheets. He takes the toothbrush out. “Have a good sleep?” 

Niall smiles and nods, wiping the sleep from his eyes before sitting up fully. “What time is it?” 

“It’s only noon, chill.” He chuckles but the blond doesn’t find it amusing, scrambling out of the bed and rushing to put his boxers and pants on. “Fuck!” He curses. “I’m late, I’m late.” He’s supposed to be in the blue standing zone queue right now. How the fuck is he supposed to get to the front? “I’m so fucking late.” 

“For what?” 

Niall pulls at the sheets, trying to find his phone and the other items of clothing that he so graciously littered all over the floor. “I, ugh, gotta go meet my relative. We were supposed to have lunch.” He nervously stutters. “Where’s my phone?” 

Zayn washes his mouth in the bathroom and laughs, slipping his hand in his pocket and retrieving Niall’s mobile. “Save the lies, mate.” He snickers, raising the device in his hand. “I’ve seen it all.” 

Niall gapes at him, his eyes wide as he stares at his phone; unlocked and open on his twitter account. And in Zayn’s hands. 

 

_Fuck_.

 

“How did you…” Zayn chucks his the device at him and Niall catches it, not being able to find the words to say. 

“My birthday, twelve-zero-one.” He smirks. “So you’re a fan?” 

Niall straightens up, trying not to flush at the older man as he shakes his head, shuffling on his feet so he’s closer to the window, even though it was obvious he was caught. The silence doesn’t help Niall at all, his cheeks burning under Zayn’s gaze as he shyly puts his phone (which has Zayn as it's lockscreen) back into his pocket and avoids his stare. 

The darker man snorts, seating himself against the headboard while he lists the tweets he remembers seeing earlier when he first woke up. 

“I want Zayn Malik’s cock. Oh how I’d love it if Zayn shoved his dick up my ass. Can Zayn please fuck me?” Niall blushes even harder, his back facing the other male as he quickly slips his shoes on from the opposite side of the room. "Shut up." He whispers. He is about to _die_. 

A warm chest presses against his bare back, arms circling around Niall’s waist and lips brushing his jaw. “I think it’s cute,” He grins, taking Niall’s ear lobe into his mouth and lightly sucking on it. “How I gave you what you’ve always wanted and fulfilled your sexual fantasies.” 

The blond gnaws at his lip, heart stuttering in his chest. “Don’t look so smug.” 

Zayn huffs out a laugh, pulling away and disappearing out into the hallway. “By the way, don’t even bother going back to your room.” 

“Why?” He asks, seeing the lad come back in with his suitcase in hand. Zayn smiles, plopping the luggage onto the bed. “Sorted out some things with Paul and he got into your hotel room and got your things. You won't be sleeping there anymore.”

Niall began to panic, “What?! _Why_?! Where will I sleep?” 

Zayn’s smile turns shy. “With me. Considering we’re in Dublin for the same amount of time, I just thought you could share a room with me instead.” He wets his lips, eyes darkening and his voice lowering to the type of tone that was all too familiar to Niall. “And maybe we can have a repeat of the night before. What d’ya think?” 

“Oh.” It was a pretty good idea when Niall thinks about it. It also gives him more time to spend with his idol/love of his life. “Yeah. Sounds great.” 

“Where you sitting?” Zayn questions as he slips on some of his rings while Niall changed his clothes hurriedly, he still wants to get a good place at the concert. “I'm standing in the blue section. That’s why I need to hurry the fuck up and get a good place in the line before there’re too many people there.” 

“Why?” Zayn furrows his brows, running a hand through his hair while he eyes the boy, who was slipping new boxers on. “Doors don’t open until five, right?” 

“Yes but people have been in the queue for hours and I’m only getting there now. How am I supposed to see you guys?” 

There’s a knock on his door and Niall squeaks in surprise, quickly shrugging a random shirt on while Zayn lazily unlocks the door and walks back towards the bathroom straight afterwards. 

“Zayn? You gonna come and get lun–” _Fuck_. That’s Liam Payne. “Who’s that?” 

Niall’s head gets stuck in the shirt hole, his arms tangled in the sleeves where he tries waving but he’s burning like a tomato, he can feel it. 

Something’s whispered that Niall doesn’t hear but when he’s released from the trap of his own clothing, he sees Liam nodding along, smiling as if he knows something. The blond shoots Zayn a curious look but the other lad shakes his head, coming over to pull Niall’s shirt down to cover his chest. “This is Niall.” 

“Hi Niall!” Liam smiles cutely and the younger holds back the urge to call him _daddy_. 

“H-Hi.” He waves, starstruck.

Liam furrows his brows but he nods anyway, “He’s cute.” 

Niall grins proudly, smiling up at him thankfully. Zayn rolls his eyes. 

“Fuck off. I’ll be down in a minute.” 

That snaps Niall out of his daze and he shrugs his backpack on, rushing out the threshold before the two of them even reach the door. Someone grabs his backpack and pulls him backwards and he’s met with Zayn’s smouldering glare. “Where are you going?” 

“ _Zayn_.” Niall whines. “I need to go to the line!” 

Zayn lets him go and shrugs. “Fine.” Liam comes to stand by his side, not really understanding their argument. “Go to the line and be at the very back of the standing queue _or_ you can tag with us and you get in early, with a guaranteed chance of being in the front.”

Niall isn’t sure if there even is a point of getting close to see them because he’s already seen 2/4 face to face, but _jesus christ_ , why is Zayn being so generous to him? They slept together but so what? He doesn’t really think that’s a good enough reason to give him such an offer; Niall doesn’t think he deserves this kind of treatment at all. He feels like he’s back at high school, cheating on a test.

 

“It’s settled!” Zayn snaps him out of his thoughts. “You’re coming with us.”

 

Zayn walks out after that, leaving Niall alone with Liam. The blond sighs shakily, not prepared for the eventful day ahead. “Hey Niall?” Niall looks towards him with a hum, blinking slowly at the David Beckham lookalike. “What’s your twitter?” 

Niall gulps. “What’s that? I don’t have it.” 

The older lad looks confused. “Yeah you do, Zayn said he followed you this morning…” 

“He f-followed me?” The blond stutters, eyes growing wide as he gestures to himself with a shaky finger. Liam chuckles, bobbing his head as a yes. “Yeah, I want to as well.” 

“Y-You want to follow m-me?” 

“Why not?” He quizzically questions. 

And maybe it’s the stress of the past day catching up with him, or the exhaustion of the night before but, he faints. 

Niall fucking _faints_.

 

–

 

The blond blinks awake after what seems like a few more hours later but it’s only a rough estimate, feeling a little immobile due to the warmth surrounding him. His phone is in his pocket but Niall is too shocked to even reach for it because as soon as he looks down, his eyes come across a tattooed arm curled around his waist. He blinks slowly, turning around to meet the face that the arm belongs to and it has his heart quaking even more. 

Mile long lashes fan over high cheekbones, pretty pink lips curled into a sleepy pout with dark stubble coating his defined jaw. Zayn looks peaceful. Niall just stops and stares at him, mouth parted open in awe of the man sleeping next to him. He watches his brows furrow before Zayn sighs, clearly annoyed and fully aware. 

“I can feel you staring at me. Stop.” He grumbles, Niall not even hearing what he comes out of Zayn’s mouth as he longingly eyes the older’s lips. Zayn groans even louder, causing Niall to jump a little at the sudden sound.

 

“ _Yes, I am spooning you_ , now please just go to sleep.” He whines, eyes still closed.

 

The blond’s mouth gapes open slightly in realisation before nodding his head and sheepishly curling into himself, turning himself over so he lay on his back, eyes trained on the ceiling. He waits a few beats, not being able to feel the tiredness he’s supposed to be feeling. In this position, how was he even supposed to sleep? He decides to voice his issue. 

“I can’t sleep.” He whispers, a little scared of what Zayn will react. They’re still pretty much strangers and Niall still has a pretty good chance of being thrown out. The reaction he does get is better than the worse things his head came up with. 

Zayn snorts. “The fuck do you want me to do about it? Sing you a lullaby?” 

This has Niall shrinking even more into himself, slipping down from his position on the pillow so that his head is directly under Zayn’s chin. He gulps, feeling like a total burden. Niall blinks his eyes closed and tries to control his breathing, aware of how loud his hyperventilating is and not wanting to disturb the older man any longer.

 

He eventually begins to drift off, but only because of the hum of _Half A Heart_ coming from above him, courtesy of Zayn himself.

 

–

 

"Niall? _Niall_. Niall, wake up." 

The blond groans, feeling his head lull from side to side. 

"Niall, mate." The voice is chuckling but Niall doesn't know what's funny. "It's concert time, bro." 

Niall forces his eyes open at that, remembering Zayn's promise earlier. He blinks before his electric blue pair meet liquid gold and he feels a tired smile curl at his lips. "Is it One Direction time, already?" 

"Niall, it's six, we're leaving in forty minutes. Shower, get dressed, curl your hair, I don't know, mate. Just get it done." The lad pulls away after that and plops himself down on the couch, doing the opposite of what he just instructed as he pulls out his phone and does absolutely nothing. 

Niall gets up anyway, scurrying over to his backpack before his eyes fall on his suitcase, laying half open on the floor. Niall begins to wonder if Zayn went through his things, and he’s not sure how that makes him feel. 

The blond frowns, slowly approaching it after examining the luggage from where he stood earlier, flushing as he sees some clothes out of place, some things he didn't put in certain ways and when he lifts it up briefly, it seemed lighter. Niall glances over his shoulder. "Zayn, did you go through my suitcase?" 

The lad smirks. "Maybe." 

Niall slits his eyes at him, lips pursing. "What did you take from it?" 

"Your dildo." 

Niall gasps, blushing a deep red. "I brought it with me?!" 

"No, but thanks for admitting you have one." 

This guy is an asshole, Niall _hates_ him. 

"Do you pretend it's my dick?" Zayn asks with another smug look on his face, not even looking up from the screen of his phone. Niall quickly pulls out a towel, blushing all the way down to his toes as he rushes to the bathroom. "Yes!" He hurriedly yells before he slams the door closed. Forty minutes, he said. That’s enough time to freshen up, probably.

 

He’s naked and hopping into the shower when he realises: _One Direction_ are taking _him_ to _their_ concert.

 

It's all a dream to Niall, really. How Zayn fucked him for one night and the next morning Niall met Liam, got 2/4 to follow him and he got – 

He freezes when he feels someone breathe on his neck, "Let’s save water, yeah?" 

– and he got _Zayn Malik_ to shower with him.

 

“Weren’t you already ready?” Niall questions, remembering Zayn this morning brushing his teeth with his clothes on. The lad simply breathes laughter into his hair, hands taking their rightful place on the dip of Niall’s waist. “Stop questioning my advances and let me kiss you.”

 

Niall tries not to snort at the unintentional reference to their song and sighs dreamily. 

He could get used to this.

 

–

 

Nothing happens really, they just make out a lot and waste more time than necessary pinned against the tiled wall with each other's tongues stuck down their throats instead of actually getting ready. 

Niall feels as if oxygen had been pumped back into his lungs, furiously chasing the taste of Zayn's mouth as the boy grips his thighs. He doesn’t really think about what they’re doing until there’s a knock on the door, a voice snapping Zayn out of his daze as he pulls away but that doesn’t stop Niall from pressing kisses down his neck and along his jaw.

"Zayn," He hears Paul shout. "You've got fifteen minutes to get ready!" He yells through the door and over the rushing water. Zayn giggles airily into Niall's ear as he rubs his thumbs over the blond's nipples, lightly sucking on his ear lobe. 

"Zayn?" Paul yells again after not getting an answer. 

"Yeah, I heard you!" The darker lad finally replies, turning off the shower and staring at the flushed boy in front of him. Niall returns his gaze, equally as breathless. 

They hear the footsteps disappear and the hotel room door closing shut and Zayn takes it as a cue for them to get out of the small space, helping Niall out first before wrapping the boy in a towel and assisting himself after. 

They get dressed in silence, both exchanging shy smiles across the room before they meet at the door, Zayn letting out an amused chuckle, "Are you ready to go see One Direction?" 

Niall lets out a shameless little cheer before grinning and nodding his head eagerly. He can feel his heart pounding in his chest at the thought of meeting the rest and watching them perform and despite being face to face with one of the members right now, he couldn’t help the surge of excitement flowing through him like a shock of electricity. 

They head down to the main lounge and Niall gulps, seeing Liam again who he greeted with an excited hug, it caught the lad off guard for sure, but he still pats Niall's back with a chuckle and a hello. 

Niall fiddles with the strap of his backpack, nervously biting at his nails when he sees Harry and Louis talking to Liam and throwing curious glances over at him. Zayn stands by his side, laughing tiredly under his breath while shaking his head. "What's with you?" 

Niall stares up at him, eyes growing wide in disbelief. "What do you mean what's up with me?! They're standing, like, ten feet away..." 

Zayn arches one dark brow. "What about me?"

It takes a while for his words to register themselves into Niall’s brain before his breath hitches in his throat. Was Zayn _jealous_? 

The thought has Niall smiling warmly up at him, nudging the lad with his elbow. "You'll always be my favourite, Zaynie." He bats his lashes at Zayn with plenty of honesty radiating from the blue in his eyes. 

Zayn rips his gaze away from Niall's and stares back at the entrance as they wait for Paul, acting nonchalant and cool and a bit careless to what the blond said but Niall notices the soft twitch of his lips and the faint bloom of pink on his cheekbones. He suddenly feels accomplished. 

"Zayn, ugh…" Paul approaches the two, eyeing Niall curiously, who only hides behind the band member with not much to say. "The vans are waiting for you, so…” Paul didn't really have much to say either. 

"Cool," he says casually. "I'll share with Louis." 

Paul looks hesitant. "Are you going to…" He trails off, pressing his index and middle finger against his lips before bringing the two digits away from his face, repeating the action slowly. Niall furrows his brows as Zayn shrugs, laughing it off as Paul walks away. Zayn walks off as well and Niall's left alone to trudge after Zayn, nervously shaking when he’s stood in front of Louis, and just like with Liam, he’s starstruck. 

Niall feels like he's in front of royalty. 

The lad seems nice enough, holding his hand out for Niall but the blond has this huge smile on his face and he immediately wraps his arms around Louis' neck just like he did with Liam. 

"Shit," Niall smiles into his neck, holding the lad tightly. "I love you so much, sorry!" He mumbles into his neck. "Don't think I'm creepy but I've always wanted to marry you." It was true, and he didn’t regret confessing that at all. Zayn might have been his favourite, but there was something about Louis that made Niall want to give him anything he’d ask for. 

He's pulled away after that, Zayn roughly tugging him back to his side while Louis chuckles, seemingly used to it. 

"That's not a problem," he breathes, the air leaving him from Niall's tight embrace. "Well maybe for my girlfriend, but whatever." He laughs graciously, rubbing the blond's back as they make their way onto the van, Zayn behind them. 

Niall shakes his head. "She doesn't have to know." He says with a light hearted laugh (even though he was sort of serious), seating himself next to Louis. The two are in the middle of a conversation, Niall beginning to plan all the different ways they could break the news to Eleanor but Zayn intrudes by stealing the seat in the middle of them. 

Louis snorts, "I'm not like this guy, though." He huffs out a chuckle, gesturing to Zayn, who rolls his eyes and turns to Niall as the engine starts, the blond whipping his mobile out and trying really hard to ignore the reference to Zayn’s unfaithfulness. He still doesn’t know the story behind it and it still gives him a shit load of guilt because they had done what they did and Niall was fully aware of how there wasn’t any turning back at this point. 

"So Niall,” Zayn is oblivious to his change of mood, deciding to spend his travel time to on trying to get to know the blond better. “Tell us about yourself?" 

The blond shrugs, looking down at his phone. "Not much to tell, really." 

"Well," Louis clears his throat. "You can tell me how you and Zayn met, firstly. I'd like to know how this," he gestures between the two of them. "Happened." 

"That's a question I think you already know the answer to, Louis." Zayn stares down at his lap, avoiding eye contact with the both of them. Louis notices the sudden switch of emotions Zayn but and Niall wasn’t really paying attention, too busy tweeting something on his phone.

 

**@craicalaic:** _CONCERT TIME !!! Yessss!_

**@craicalaic:** _Smells like weed in here lol x_

**@craicalaic:** _why doesn't anyone want t marry me_

 

He gets a notification seconds later from a bunch of his followers, one girl replying to him. 

 

**@LiamsGurl_1D: _@craicalaic_** _i'd like to marry you_

 

Niall grimaces, crinkling his nose. 

 

**@craicalaic: _@LiamsGurl_1D_** _sorry i <3 zayn's dick bYE_

 

Niall hears a chuckle erupt from next to him, seeing Zayn staring down at his phone in utter amusement, Louis eyeing the same thing and snorting along with him. Niall frowns. "Are you looking at my profile?!" 

Zayn shakes his head innocently, his fringe falling over his eyes as his lips stretch over his teeth in a sly grin. “No, I'm looking at my DM's." He denies Niall’s accusal. The youngest simply humphs, locking his phone and crossing his arms over his chest in clear agitation. That’s total bullshit, Niall knows it is. 

Zayn just rolls his eyes as he watches the blond stare (or perhaps _glare_ ) out the window, typing a direct message to one fan and smirking the whole way through. Once it’s sent, he leans back in his seat satisfied. 

Straight after, Niall feels his phone vibrate and he looks down at the screen, lips pursed.

 

**Fr: zaynmalik1D** , it read.

 

He bites down at his lip and opens it, screen shotting the message He’s still choosing not to look at Zayn but he’s smiling anyway. Niall quickly crops the photo so Zayn's user and picture doesn't show and tweets the picture with a smiley face that matched the one spread across his own.

 

**@craicalaic:** _:D_  

[image] _You’re more beautiful when you smile :) x_

 

Once he posts it, Zayn's smiling down at him, eyebrow raised. Niall returns the expression and the two begin to giggle, making weird faces at each other as the van continued to move. It earns them both a laugh from the other guy and the interaction has Niall’s stomach buzzing because it’s the first time him and Zayn have acted friendly toward each other without having the aim of getting in each other’s pants. Although right now, getting into Zayn’s pants didn’t sound like such a bad idea, but he’s sure they can sort that out later. 

"Jesus christ," Louis breathes from beside them. 

Both lads turn around to face him, watching Louis confusedly. "What?" Zayn asks, way too defensively, in Louis' opinion but looking genuinely curious. The brunet raises his hands up, pleading innocence and shaking his head. 

"Nothing!" He sing songs.

 

—

 

**@kissmehxrry: _@craicalaic_** _WTF THATS SO CUTE?!?!?!!_

 

**@weedchester: _@craicalaic_** _did your boyfie send u that eyyyyyy_

 

**@livelaughlouis: _@craicalaic_** _ooohh make sure to ride that dick_

 

**@zzaynal: _@craicalaic_** _HAVE A GOOD CONCERT NIALL!!!!_

 

**@daddypayne: _@craicalaic_** _HOW DID YOU GET 2/4???!?!!!_

 

**@craicalaic: _@kissmehxrry_** _hahah ikr_

**@craicalaic: _@weedchester_** _i don't have a boyfriend :(_

**@craicalaic: _@livelaughlouis_** _already have! Haha_

**@craicalaic: _@zzaynal_** _thanks !! I defo will_

 

—

 

Niall Horan-Malik _favourited this_  

**@daddypayne: _@craicalaic_** _HOW DID YOU GET 2/4???!?!!!_

 

—

 

The van parks outside the stadium and Niall can see people staring at them through the window, squealing when they stop just outside the stadium. Their windows are tinted so they can look outside but nobody could look in and Niall feels momentarily smug for a second because _haha_ , I'm with two members of One Direction, bitch. But at the same time he feels quite bad because all these people are working hard to be where they are, queueing for hours so they get to see the boys and here's Niall cruising effortlessly inside with two of the members all because one of them fucked him the night before. He’s lucky, he really is, but he still feels bad. 

"Ni, we're stopping here, yeah? This is early bird entry so you're guaranteed a good place." Zayn explains with a nod as the vehicle comes to a halt, Louis staring out the window and looking out at fans, smiling at their excitement. Niall feels a brief warmth encircle his heart when he stares at the lad, reality striking him out from his reverie a little too late as his lips fall into a frown. 

"Woah, wait.” He stops him. “I don't have these tickets though…" 

"You're in the blue zone, aren't you?" 

"Yeah, but–" 

"Listen," Zayn holds his hand up for Niall to shush, chuckling a little when the blond immediately obeys. "Line up and when you get to the lady or whoever's working the front, just tell them your name. You'll get a police escort to your section." 

The blond's eyes grow wide. "Police escort? That's a little too much, I mean.. I'm sure I can get there myself, the escort's really not necessary." 

Zayn rolls his eyes. "The place is huge, you'll get lost."

Niall tilts his head sideways, shaking his head. "But I've been here before…" 

Louis cuts the both of them off, evidently aggravated with their squabbling. "Just listen to him, for christ's sake. Zayn isn't backing down so just do what he says!" He exhales, face showing fond annoyance for his best friend and the grimace on his features told Niall that he was so _done_ with them both. After much hesitation, Niall shrugs his backpack on, begrudgingly placing his hand on the handle. "Are you sure this is going to work? I don't want to be pushed to the back." 

"You won't, trust me." He runs a hand through Niall's hair and pulls him in for a brief hug, stunning Niall for a few. "We'll make sure you won't." He sounds so certain, Niall's stomach is having a hardcore butterfly wrestling match. He smiles into his shoulder and sees Louis gagging from where he sat, rolling his eyes at the back of Zayn's head. The blond chuckles before drawing back, opening the door and chuckling a little when people disappointedly shrink back into their lines. Niall makes sure the door isn't open too wide in case they're caught and he waits for the car to leave, waving and watching as it rolls backstage. 

 

Once Niall gets into the queue, these girls around his age question him. 

 

"Whose car was that?" This one with frizzy curls asks, gesturing to where the dark van sped off to. Her friends seems shy, looking a little embarrassed at the curly one’s forwardness.

Niall flushes, fiddling with the phone in his hands. "Oh, it's my, ugh, relative. They drove me here." 

"But how come they drove into the off-limits section?"

Niall says the first thing that came to his mind. "They work here." Believable enough, not bad, Nialler. 

"Really? What as?" This girl is really nosy, he thinks. 

"He, ugh, puts the stage up and sorts out the lights and smoke. It's really cool," he nervously laughs, scratching the back of his head, suddenly wanting to _get the fuck out of there_. She's about to say something else when Niall's phone rings and he scrambles to pick it up, jogging a few feet away to answer it, not even caring that the number was unknown. "Hello?" He answers hurriedly, looking over his shoulder to see the three girls looking at him curiously. 

"Niall, it's me."

 

_What the fuck_.

 

"Zay–" he stops himself. "How do you have my number?!" He whisper yells, smiling awkwardly at the group who are still – annoyingly – eyeing him up the way he eyed his mother’s cooking. He returns to his place next to the group once more fans walk into the line; two girls around the age of fifteen with a very grumpy looking dad. Niall bites at his nails. 

"While you were sleeping," Zayn giggles cutely. "How are you doing? I'm inside the stadium already." 

Niall smiles, "Good. And I'm okay, little hungry though." He pouts at his growling stomach, remembering how he fainted just before lunch. He wonders if his mum packed him anything in his backpack that he doesn't know of. 

"D'you want me to send you some food? Sarah's probably willing to cook somethin' for ya." 

Niall gasps. "No! Jesus christ, I'm alright, don't worry about me." Zayn Malik is definitely something else. 

"Whatever you say, Niall." Niall makes sure the volume's down so other people can't hear the voice on the other end. "By the way, early bird entry opens up soon. I'll see you out there, okay? Gotta get my hair done." 

Niall snorts. "But your hair's already perfect, babe." 

"Well, apparently Lou doesn't think so.” The lad grumbles. “Once the concert's done, someone's gonna pick you up, kay? Gotta go now. Byee." 

Once Niall says bye, he keeps the phone to his chest while he adds Zayn as a contact, his eyes meeting with cold blue ones after he's done. "Relative, huh?" She mutters unconvinced but Niall still nods despite how pale he is. Probably more pale than usual. 

She narrows her eyes at him before smiling, "You can go in front of us." 

The blond would be lying if he said he wasn't the least bit scared.

 

—

 

Once the line starts moving, Niall gets to the front quickly, blinking at the lady and gaping for a few moments when she asks for his pass. The blond shakes his head, offering her his blue zone ticket and ignoring the giggling behind him. It doesn't take long for the lady to realise. 

"Oh, are you Niall Horan?" The giggling stops as Niall nods, triumphantly might he add. She bobs her head in response before speaking into the walkie talkie on her shoulder. The blond feels his cheeks pink at what she says next. 

"Horan for police escort to blue zone, standing by early bird entry. Requested for front row, I repeat, Horan for escort to blue from early entry – front row." She emphasises firmly. 

The lady tells him to wait and Niall gulps, looking at the girls behind him and smiling sheepishly when they gawk at him in amazement. He shrugs shyly before he’s given a bracelet and a guard appears by his side, "Niall Horan?" he asks and the lad nods before he's beckoned to follow the large bulky man in front of him. 

The man takes him to a hallway, leading him inside and meandering through long corridors and before Niall knows it, he's met with daylight, the stadium looking bigger from the ground. He gasps a little, staring at the stage as if it were the gates of heaven. 

He has to stop walking for a second to admire the accomplishments of his four sunshines, taking the world by absolute storm ever since they lost The X Factor. It sounds so fucking ridiculous but that's what happened. They lost a singing competition but won everyone's hearts, including Niall's, going from stairs to fucking stadiums in a span of three fucking years. One Direction are an overall phenomenon, and Niall just so happens to be lucky enough to know 3/4 of them. 

"Sir?" The man brings him out of his thoughts. _Again with the sir?_ Niall thinks, following the man anyway. He isn’t the first to his zone, there are a couple of girls there and a few parents as well but he doesn't pay them much attention, immediately taking his place at the corner of the stage, right at the beginning of the runway. 

The guard disappears but Niall doesn't give a shit because _oh my god_ , he's about to see One Direction live. He jumps up a little, not being able to control his excitement as well as the huge smile on his face and he wants to cry which is weird because he's hugged a member, been fucked by another and been rejected by one, he shouldn’t be feeling like this. It's overwhelming to him, how much has happened. It just doesn't feel real. 

He sends Zayn a text as more people start coming in, not wanting to look like the total loner he was.

 

**Niall:** _I'm at the front oh my fuck !!_

**Zayn:** _Where??_

 

Niall narrows his eyes at the text, smirking quietly to himself and replying.

 

**Niall:** _Why ;) xx_  

**Zayn:** _So I know where you are and I can give you a wave ahah x_  

**Niall:** _Hahaha blow me a kiss once you see me , will ya ??_  

**Zayn:** _Rather blow you instead to be honest_ x

 

(Niall lets out the most inhumane noise and receives a glare from this little girl's dad.)

 

**Niall:** _We can do that later ;)_  

**Zayn:** _Promise?_  

**Niall** : _Promise!_

 

—

 

Niall has the best time and they weren't even on yet, enjoying the opening act and dancing along to the pounding music while some people stare worriedly at him. He’s completely fine though, just having a good time. The sound bounces through the whole stadium, the floor shaking with every pound of the drum, strum of a guitar or each lyric sang through the mic. Niall's pulse is raising and it’s shocking how much fun he has despite being by himself.

 

By the time his boys come on stage, Niall is ecstatic. Well, everyone is.

 

The whole stadium screams as soon as they make their appearance; loud enough that you could barely hear them sing with all the squealing. It’s chaos, the _nice_ kind of chaos. 

They all come out wearing differing clothes to what they had on before, Zayn looking like his japan self with his hair spiky and a blue shirt with the sleeves pulled up to his elbows, showcasing his tattoos. God, Niall just wants to do dirty things with him.

 

(Oh, _wait_ ).

 

Harry, Liam and Louis are colour coordinated with the colours of black and white and they all look _fine_ , but Zayn stood out, in Niall’s eyes.

 

They all make their way towards the runway, singing the lyrics to _Midnight Memories_ and waving to fans as well as interacting with each other. It’s amazing, and Zayn _especially_ makes it a night to remember.

 

During _Rock Me_ he walks over to Niall's side, waving over to a group of fans who respond with screaming whilst Niall smiles and winks at him. Zayn merely smirks, thrusting his hips along to the chorus and thoroughly enjoying Niall's gaping mouth as he hits his high note.

 

_Right Now_ is Niall's favourite song mainly because Zayn dominates the whole thing and sings so beautifully that it makes Niall want to cry (harder than he already is).

 

As more songs pass, Zayn continues to tease Niall through the concert, winking in his direction, smirking and licking his lips, doing other things to drive the blond boy mad (Liam and Louis also come to wave but he’s sort of distracted). Niall also doesn't know how many times Zayn's going to drink from that damn water bottle because he keeps coming back to get it and it's conveniently placed near where Niall’s stood so that's probably a hint. Or maybe Zayn's just really thirsty. For what, Niall doesn't know exactly.

 

_Little Things_ and _Moments_ were certainly tear jerking; Niall thanks a few girls when they pass him some much needed tissues which he uses to wipe his wet cheeks. He gets quite close to said girls and dances along with them, introducing himself and shaking each of their hands. He gets the usual sexuality question to which he answers _yes, I'm gay_ and also states his love for Zayn, falling quiet when another girl in the group said he's her fave as well. Niall does nothing but fake a smile and continues on with the concert, putting unwanted jealousy aside. After all, he’s just a fuck and nothing more

 

By the time _What Makes You Beautiful_ came around, Niall is starving and cold and slightly damp but he stays in his place, waiting for the boys to return. Luckily enough, these girls give him a sandwich and Niall feels like he’s bumped into a group of fallen angels because they also hand him a bottle of water and a warm hug. He learns their names and gets their twitters, promising to follow each and every one of them once he's back where he has wifi. The break helps them bond a little, the group asking him if he's from this area to which he replies a no, saying he booked a hotel and was staying for all three concerts. They all seem amazed but then Niall tells them he stole his mother's credit card for it and they all laugh along with him.

 

The boys return shortly after and all Niall can say at this point, is that _You & I_ was a religious experience and Zayn's high note was the Amen of all Amens.

 

By the time the closing song comes around, _Best Song Ever_ , everyone is crying apart from Niall, who is approached by a bodyguard and told to wait. Niall gets a little annoyed because everyone around him hears and stares at him once the guard’s back in his place, Considering him and Zayn have a thing going on, the last thing he wants is attention. He already knows he had to stay there but now he has to face the girls who he’s befriended, and he hated nothing more than being questioned. 

"Do you know the boys?" One asks. "Because Zayn kept coming over here and Liam waved at you once." 

"Pretty sure Louis did as well." Another chirps and they all hum in agreement as the crowd disperses in tears.

Niall shakes his head and acts innocent. "How would I know One Direction?" He emphasises. "They make more money in two seconds than I get in one month!" 

It’s pretty convincing because after that they nod and say their goodbyes, squeezing him and asking him to keep in touch. 

 

After their little hug session, the guard pulls back the barrier and lets Niall through, leading him into the back without letting anyone see. 

The first thing Niall has to face is a shirtless Harry Styles and he feels his cheeks practically burn at the sight of his tattooed torso. Niall looks anxiously at the guard only to find him gone, Harry staring at him curiously. 

"Are you lost?" He politely asks, other workers in the room staring confusedly at him as if he was a two headed moose. Niall was a little offended at this because he’s sure Harry and Louis were eyeing him up back at the hotel when Liam spoke to them. 

"Um, where's Zayn?" 

"Sorry lad. No fans allowed." A guard appears, taking a tight hold of the blond's wrist.

"B-But I'm with Zayn…" He frowns, not enjoying the way this man held his forearm like he was about to snap it in half. 

"Of course you are." He sighs, clearly annoyed but so is Niall. 

"I'm telling the truth!" 

Niall stares helplessly back to where Harry stood only to see him gone and though Niall feels abandoned and betrayed, it all changes as the guard turns them around the curve of the hallway. Niall catches a glimpse of his tattooed saviour calling out his name and jogging hurriedly after them. 

"He's with me! He's with me! Niall's with me." Zayn stops the guard from taking Niall away from him. It's like the second time this has happened and Niall's getting very tired of all these big men mistaking him for some crazed fan. And he is a fan, but he wouldn't sneak in here. He doesn’t have the balls to. 

Niall runs to stand behind Zayn while he talks to the guard, trying to ignore the people around him but it's hard to not pay attention to Harry who’s reappeared – he was probably the one to get Zayn – and is now smiling down at Niall, offering him a hand to shake.

 

"So you're the Niall the other lads were talking about?"

 

Niall nods, smiling widely and staring down at Harry's hand with uncertainty. The taller boy pulls his hand back with a small "oh" before throwing his arms out; sometimes hugs are better than handshakes. 

Niall then laughs and runs into them, squeezing Harry tightly. " _Harry_ ," Niall wanted to scream. "I love you so much, you did so well out there! Holy fuck," the blond inhales his scent, and it’s possibly one of the best things to ever enter his nostrils. 

"Love you too." Harry huffs out a laugh, squeezing Niall just as hard and giving a quiet "thank you" into his ear. They rock back and forth for a beat before Niall hears someone clear his throat behind him. He pulls back and sees Zayn standing there, his face stern as he raises an eyebrow expectantly. 

"What?" The blond questions, oblivious to what he was waiting for. 

There's a flash of disappointment that flutters across Zayn's face and he sighs, walking away with his shoulders hunched while Niall looked towards Harry, not understanding his problem. The taller lad points at him and spreads his arms out signifying a hug, so that's exactly what Niall does, running after the tattooed man and squeezing him from the back. Probably a lot tighter than he should have. 

It makes Niall smile even wider knowing Zayn was jealous – for like the second time – and it makes his chest tighten with that feeling. The older lad is winded, the air being squeezed out from his lungs as the blond continues to squish him.

"N-Niall." Zayn wheezed, struggling in the boy's grip. 

"If you wanted a hug, Zaynie, you could've just asked!" 

"I didn't w-want a hug." He pants, stopping and letting Niall hug him, his sides aching but his back warm where Niall's lips brushed his neck. 

"Everyone wants a hug." He says matter-of-factly. Zayn tries to move his elbows but the boy behind him proceeds to latch himself onto Zayn like a koala. 

"Well," he sighed. "If you let me go m-maybe I can give you a proper one." His words fall quieter as they reach the end of the sentence and he can feel his cheeks burn when he notices Harry and the rest of the people in the room staring at them with not so discreetly suppressed grins. Niall's hold loosens slowly, giving Zayn a few moments to breathe before he’s back, the blond hair tickling the stubble at his chin; another tight squeeze being delivered to his middle. 

"You're so cute." Niall gushes, closing his eyes as he hugs him. He never wants to let go.

 Slowly, Zayn wraps his arms around the shorter blond, patting him on the back before keeping his hand rested on his hair, running his fingers through the natural brown roots at the back of his head. 

"Thanks." He chuckles, sliding his hands up Niall's arms before they rest on his shoulders. Quietly, he whispers, "Now I believe you promised me something?"

 

—

 

The ride back to the hotel is rushed, the two getting one van for themselves because Louis was kind enough to "give them some time alone". The two certainly did enjoy the private van, their lips locked and their crotches rubbing together through the whole drive. Of course by the time they actually reached the hotel, they were met with fans. 

"Shit." Zayn curses when they pull to a stop and hear screams through the closed window. Niall frowns, running a hand through his mussed hair. "How are we supposed to get through that?" 

"The back. Can you take us 'round the back?" Zayn asks the driver but he states that he can’t go there without getting permission from the manager, and Paul isn’t with them. The two sit there, their cheeks red, thinking of how they're supposed to make it through without being seen together but it doesn’t really matter because they already look so obvious parked there for five minutes doing nothing. 

Then Niall has an idea. 

"I'll go first!" He said suddenly. "I'll leave first then you go but come back and you'll arrive the same time as the other boys!" 

"So we don't look suspicious…" 

Niall nods. "Exactly."

Without much else to say, Niall shrugs his backpack on, his phone in his hand and his hair looking not so sexed up as he opens the car slowly, watching everyone shrink disappointedly just like earlier. He shuts the door and stares down at his phone, seeing Zayn's name pop up on the screen in his DM's.

 

**Fr: zaynmalik1D**

_Nice arse ;) x_

 

Locking his phone with a small smile on his face, he continues into the hotel feeling smug as he hears the car pull away. He presses the button of the elevator and waits for it to get to the ground floor, not even replying. He looks back on the past two days and can’t stop the grin that appears on his face. Hanging out with the people that make him smile every day was something Niall never imagined happening to him; he’s only ever seen that happen in fiction but it’s happening in his reality and it’s fucking _awesome_. 

Niall looks over at the fans outside and hopes nobody got any photos of him. Though he suspects they were too excited for the appearance of the boys that they’d just ignore him.

 

Once he steps into the lift, the screams get louder and Niall's met with a smirking Zayn slipping out of the same black van before the two metal doors come to a close.

During his ascent, another noise erupts from Niall's pocket.

 

**Fr: zaynmalik1D**  

_Couldn't wait for me could you ? ;(_

 

—

 

Niall waits outside the elevator for them to climb up, choosing to scroll through his twitter feed to pass the time considering they'll probably stay to greet a few fans. What he sees was something he didn't expect to witness.

 

**@1DUpdates_IRE:** _A guy was said to be seen leaving the same van as Zayn! Nobody knows who he is. (via insider)_

**@1DUpdates_IRE:** _It was parked outside of the hotel for 5 mins before he came out then the van left, 20 secs later Zayn was seen leaving the same van alone._

@ **1DUpdates_IRE** : _The rest of the band came the same time Zayn did but in a separate vehicle. (via insider)_

**@1DUpdates_IRE:** _Fans noticed that the one the guy was in and the one Zayn was in had the same license plate!_

 

Shit.

 

**@1DUpdates_IRE:** _This is what the guy looked like. (via_ ** _@Updates1D_** _)_ [image]

 

So maybe his plan wasn’t as smart as he thought. Double shit.

 

The photo that’s linked isn’t obviously _him_ but if people knew him and faved his selfies then maybe everyone would find out. He checks his mentions and sees people replying to his tweets and retweeting and favouriting and all that shit until he stumbles upon one that wasn't a reply, but was a question.

 

**@zoueed: _@craicalaic_** _did you enjoy your concert?_  

**@craicalaic: _@zoueed_** _YES!! It was the best thing i've ever experienced !!_

**@zoueed: _@craicalaic_** _you just haven't been tweeting as much as you used to ever since you got to Dublin. I'm glad you had fun! :)_

 

Niall felt like that smiley face was a big suspicious fuck you.

 

**@craicalaic: _@zoueed_** _yeh everythings just been so great i don't even have time to tweet anymore! Had to queue for quite a bit as well !! Took ages_

 

Okay maybe he lied. But so what? Not like they would know.

 

**@zoueed: _@craicalaic_** _haha, what hotel are you staying at?_

 

Well Niall definitely wasn't answering that question. He continued to venture through his feed without much interest, refreshing his timeline and stopping at one tweet that was certainly going to fuck him over.

 

**@1DUpdates_:** _The guy spotted with Zayn was also said to be seen at the Early Bird queue at Croke Park! He had a police escort into the stadium. (via insider)_

 

The elevator ding makes Niall jump and almost drop his phone, he manages to catch it in his palm as the boys stroll out, each greeting him with a smile, even the security guard. Zayn nods over at him and furrows his brows at how shaken Niall looks. 

"What's wrong?" He asks, hands holding him in place when Niall pulls away. The blond shakes his head and just lets Zayn drag him towards the hotel room. They enter without a word, Niall flushing as he's overcome with this sense of familiarity, mind flashing images from last night as he stares sheepishly at the dents behind the headboard. 

"You can tell me what's wrong, Niall." He says earnestly, stripping off his flannel so he stood there in his tank top. Niall wants to yell at him _you're what's wrong!_ because he's so fucking hot, Niall's knees are buckling. Catching himself by placing a hand against the desk and sighing. What if telling Zayn screws up what they have? 

"No, it's fine." He assures. "Nothing you need to worry about."

Zayn frowns and sits at the edge of the bed, eyeing Niall as the blond stays where he is, seemingly not wanting to be anywhere near him. "Tell me." He mutters, bringing his hands together and tracing the tattoos on his arm. Niall shrugs, quickly saying the first thing that came to his mind. "It's my mum." 

"What about her?" Well. 

Niall bites his lips and searches through his mind for a reasonable excuse, a lightbulb shining over his head when he remembers the issue he had with his mum right before he got here. _You better find a way to pay me back before you come home!_ She had shouted at him while he ate breakfast. "Well, I kinda stole her credit card to pay for the whole thing and even though she says she loves me, I can tell she's going to murder me for coming back without a solution." 

Zayn bursts out laughing at that, falling onto the bed as he stares at the ceiling. "Fuck. How much d'you owe her?" 

"About three," he rubs a hand down his face. "Thousand quid..." 

"Three grand? Really?" He seemed amazed even though to people like him, three grand was like three quid. Once again, Niall's stunned by how down to earth Zayn is, a small smile making a way on his face as he began to tell his story. "To buy the tickets, I used me mam's card to buy them as well as the hotel…"

Zayn laughs again, eyes wide and brows raised as he nods his head, urging Niall to continue. 

"So she smacked me in the head 'n told me to find a way to pay for it before I got home. And I know I shouldn't be worrying and everythin', and I know she probably wasn't serious but it'd take me a while to even get a grand with the lame ass job I have, and I wanna pay her back as soon as possible."

The darker lad's laughter quietens, gaze holding Niall's still as he tilts his head. "Why?" 

"She's my mother, I feel guilty for being such a burden to her, 'specially since she actually let me off and allowed me to go." He smiles fondly, his face expressing great pride for his mum because she truly is a great lady. 

"Mm," Zayn hums. "I can take your mind off things…" One dark brow raising suggestively when the blond freezes, contemplating it for a moment before looking back at him. Oddly enough, Niall has this small side of him that doesn’t want to, fearing he’s just like everybody else. And it’s fucking stupid, because he _is_ like everybody else. Niall doesn't know how many people Zayn's done this with, but he knows that doing it two nights in a row isn't going to make him any different from the other girls and boys. Zayn probably does this with all his groupies, treats them like gold so he can get a good lay. 

 

As much as he wants to be treated properly, he also wants his days with Zayn to last longer. 

 

And with that small smirk tugging at his lips, Niall finds himself and Zayn falling into bed, the night ahead of them seeming more intense from Niall's not-so-subtle anger. But Zayn doesn't mention it.

 

—

 

He lays beside Zayn panting, body flushed and bottom aching from the deliciousness delivered to his prostate. He's fucked Niall into the mattress this time, back to chest while Zayn littered his neck with more hickeys that Niall knew would be harder to explain to anybody asking at tomorrow's concert. Niall had wanted to do the same with Zayn but he was told to not do as much, only scratches because they would easily fade. It reminds Niall of how they have to be kept secret, and it makes him frown, Zayn's fiancée springing to mind. 

"What does your fiancée think of this?" He suddenly blurts out when Zayn makes obvious movements to show he wants another round. Niall's back in his boxers so he really doesn't want to right now. 

" _Perrie_ doesn't have a say in who I fuck," He emphasises her name. "She's irrelevant, don't talk about her." 

Niall’s more than confused. "But…aren't you guys engaged?" 

"Well," Zayn snorts, shaking his head as he lets his hands rest on Niall's stomach, enjoying the heat radiating beneath his fingers. "Don't think 'm allowed to tell you, really." He sounds tired but Niall can see the fingers resting on his stomach twitch wildly. 

"I told you the issue with my mother." He mutters, accent thick with the need for sleep. He'd like to rest up for tomorrow but he wants to hear the reason _why_ Zayn's doing this, because to Niall it feels good doing what they do, but he'll always feel that hint of guilt for doing this behind someone's back. He doesn’t want to be apart of a cheating scandal, certainly not this one. 

 

He's suddenly glad he didn't bring a friend or a parent along because he knows it wouldn't have gone the way it did on his first night here.

 

"But this is like a proper big thing and considering you're a fan, there's a large chance you could tell people." 

Niall snorts. "I've nobody to tell."

Zayn shrugs, Niall's head shifting closer to his neck, a pale arm stretched across his stomach. "Don't wanna take the risk." 

"C'mon." Niall pinches his nipple, earning him an annoyed hum. "Tell me." 

"Niall, don't." He tries to dismiss, his tone solemn but Niall doesn't sense it, continuing to bug him. "Pleeeeeeease. I promise you I won't tell anybody, I've no friends back home anyway." 

Zayn frowns. "Really?" 

Niall gives a careless shrug, symbolising the fact that he gives zero fucks. "As cheesy as it sounds, you boys are all I've ever needed." 

Zayn rolls his eyes at that, not being able to hold back the huge grin on his face. He pushes Niall off his shoulder and releases a deep sigh, Niall silently cheering in triumph. "Perrie isn't actually my fiancée. And we're not actually engaged." 

 

Niall wants to hold back the loud _I KNEW IT_ that is threatening to explode out of him so instead he bites his lip, smiling widely as his dreams of him and Zayn's future of getting married and having kids are confirmed. He can see it vividly in his head, him and Zayn in matching rocking chairs while they stare out into the garden where their kids and grandkids play peacefully, a white fence surrounding their pretty million dollar home in California.

 

"The smile on your face makes me think that you approve of this news." Zayn snaps him from his reverie and Niall shamelessly nods, admitting to his faults. Zayn’s probably used to it anyway. "I do. It also makes me feel less guilty for having your dick up my arse just a few minutes ago." 

Zayn snorts, amused. "Do you want my dick up your arse again?" He asks, eyebrows raised as his arms encircled Niall's waist and sliding down his hips. Niall groaned a _fuck yes_ into Zayn's shoulder, curiously wondering what round this was when he feels a fist wrap around his hardening member and wet fingers enter his hole.

 

—

 

The morning after, Niall sneaks off at eight in the morning and grabs a taxi to the stadium, and the whole 14 minutes, Niall feels the biggest wave of guilt hit him, and why, he doesn't fucking know. He's sure Zayn doesn't give a fuck anyway. 

When he arrives at his line, he actually feels like a normal fan, the portable charger in his pocket and a huge hood over his head to try and preserve the very little body warmth he had. There are about eight or ten people in front of him and he feels so nice without Zayn there with him trying to help him. Niall feels like it would be better if he worked for his seats, and he knows Zayn wouldn't let him yesterday so here he is now.

 

**@craicalaic:** _Day number two !! Lets do this!_

@ **craicalaic** : _It's almost 9 I'm gonna be here for a while hahahaha_

@ **craicalaic** : _I AM GOING TO BE HERE FOR 8 HOURS_

@ **craicalaic** : _I forgot to eat breakfast as well fml_

@ **craicalaic** : _the things i do for one direction ._

 

 

**@zeeyummy: _@craicalaic_** _HOPE YOU HAVE FUN_  

**@craicalaic: _@zeeyummy_** _fuck yeh i will !!!! Thanx_

 

 

**@do_re_lilo: _@craicalaic_** _NIALL POST PICS_

**@craicalaic: _@do_re_lilo_** _i actually forgot to take pics yesterday !! Hahahaa_

 

— — —

 

Niall Horan-Malik _favourited this_  

**@zaxnmalick:** _do you accept zayn malik as your lord and saviour_  

**@larrypaylik:** _when you remember zayn malik is real and you accidentally stab your own ass_  

**@payneOH:** _MY FAVE IS LIAM BUT I WON'T HESITATE CALLING ZAYN DADDY IF I EVER GOT THE CHANCE_  

**@daddyxmalik: _@zaynmalik_** _pls eat me out i will sEND YOU MY SOUL_

 

— — —

 

Niall wants to stop using up his battery but he's got a charger in his pocket and his 3G game is strong and he can totally waste eight hours away like this, he's done it before. Every day, actually. In Mullingar. 

Yeah, Niall doesn't do much. 

His phone starts to vibrate in his hands and he frowns, seeing Zayn's name pop up on the screen to which he answered quickly, not wanting anybody to see. "Hello?" 

 

"Where the fuck are you?"

 

Niall doesn't appreciate his tone. "Good morning to you, too!" He grumbles with a yawn, ignoring his growling stomach.

"Niall, I wake up and you're not next to me. It definitely _wasn’t_ a good fucking morning so where the fuck are you?" He sounds so mad and it makes Niall's sassy front crumble a bit, biting his lip.

"I'm at the stadium…standing in the queue." He mumbles weakly, feeling sheepish when he receives a beat of silence. 

"Oh, so you don't want to see us up close, right then." 

Niall rolls his eyes, lowering his voice. "Zayn, of course I do. I'm like twelfth in line." The people in front of him don't seem to be paying attention anyway, so that's alright. 

"If you went with us, you could have been _first_!" 

Niall wants to ask him why do you fucking care but he doesn't really want to hear the answer. "I wanna do this myself though, I don't wanna cheat my way through this." The blond explains softly. "I don't feel comfortable with you lads doing all this for me all because you and I…fucked, y'know?" Niall really hopes people can't hear them. 

He doesn't get anything but a stressful sigh. "Have you at least had breakfast?" 

Niall gulps. "Yes." 

"I forgot to eat breakfast as well eff-em-ell." Was Zayn on his twitter? 

"I was in a rush, okay!" He defends himself. "Wanted to get a good place and don't you dare start about how it would be different if I was with you guys." He cups his hand over his mouth just to make sure, shuffling forward in the line.

 

"Fine."

 

" _Fine_." Niall says back.

 

"Whatever." Zayn Malik is actually a child.

 

Niall repeats. " _Whatever_."

 

The blond can feel him smirking, his suspicions confirmed when he hears him huff. His next words sound nothing like the face he was probably expressing. "Stay safe, we'll see you in a few hours, yeah? We’re flying out to perform in Glasgow but we’ll be back, promise.” Zayn chuckles. Why, Niall doesn’t know but he hums anyway. He had heard they were gonna perform there, but he didn’t think it was true because they had a concert the same day as well. The blond only realised now how busy they really were. 

“What are you guys performing?” Niall asks, wondering if they might be late or not. 

“Ugh, I don’t know really.” Came Zayn’s tired and confused-sounding answer. Niall just laughs. “Think there’s quite a few but we’ll be back on time, don’t worry. Have fuuunnn." 

Why is he so cute? Niall looks up into the heavens and does the sign of the cross. He can't handle this guy. 

"I will." He replies normally. "Love you guuuuys." 

"We love you too, bye." Niall mutters his own bye and the blond feels like he's been swept off his feet, his heart beating wildly in his chest as his palms began to sweat.

 

—

 

About a few hours later, around noon or so, Niall's head snaps up at the shout of his last name. He looks to both his sides before standing up and on his tiptoes and peeking over the many heads to find whoever had shouted his name. Niall sees fans of all shapes and sizes, some with their parents and some with their friends. It's amazing to see how much a variety there is at concerts like this, but Niall's sure as _fuck_ that pizza guys don't show up to these kind of gigs.

A guy’s stood outside the metal barriers holding a box of pizza, wearing a Domino's uniform and searching the crowd. For Niall, probably. 

The blond flushes before raising his hand and waving him over. He lowers himself onto his feet and notices all these teenage girls staring and he feels so small, trying to hide his face because there's no doubt in Niall's head that this will end up somewhere on the internet. He’s already identified as the "blond guy coming out of the same vehicle as Zayn Malik", he really doesn’t want to be given the new label of "the same blond guy who came out of the same vehicle as Zayn Malik was waiting in the blue queue and had pizza".

The pizza man heads over to the security guard standing by and gestures to Niall and the box in his hands, the guard soon nodding after the man whispers something into his ear. They pull apart and the guard makes his way around so he stands beside Niall but on the opposite side of the barrier, handing the pizza to the boy with a smile. 

"You Horan?" Niall nods, taking the box from him. "Pizza lad said it was from Zack?"

 Can Zayn be anymore obvious? 

Niall feels the heat paint his cheeks and he smiles at the older man awkwardly, aware of all the stares he's getting and he's not sure if they're looking at him or the pizza. Either way, they're looking his direction and it's worse because he came here _alone_. 

"He a special someone of yours?" The guard smirks. 

Niall figures everyone knew he was gay just by coming to these things because people tend to prejudge before they actually get to know him but in this case they’re bang on correct so he guesses being offended was sorta pointless. The question hangs in silence for a second before Niall just shrugs, feeling multiple gazes burn holes in his clothes. 

"Maybe one day, if things go well." He mysteriously winks before thanking the man and opening the lid. The guard then nods, seemingly unsatisfied with the answer but wandering back to his post at the front of the queue anyway. 

Holy mother of meatballs, Niall thinks when he sees the meat and cheese scattered across the dough. Zayn went all out. Speaking of balls, he thinks, he takes out his phone and sends a quick text to his one and only.

 

**Niall:** _Thanks for the pizza , ya definitely kno how to make me happy !!_

**Niall:** _Did you srsly have t say it was from zack tho like cmon malik_

 

**Zayn:** _it was either that or antonio :)_

 

**Niall:** _Antonio's a hot name why didn't you choose that one !_

 

**Zayn:** _because louis came up with it!_

 

**Niall:** _Might use it later ! Hahah_

 

**Zayn:** _that'd be like a kick in the balls if you said someone else's name in bed instead of mine:( x_

 

**Niall:** _Fine I'll scream out zack then instead :D_

 

He grinned at his phone before slipping it back into his backpack. He sits down on the floor next to another group of girls and he feels them eyeing his food. He sighs, when the pizza's touching his lips, begging for Niall to eat all of it's greasy goodness. Alas, Niall lowers the slice and looks over towards the group, slowly sliding the box across the ground and over to them. 

They thank him and dig in, Niall offering some to the younger girls next to him who have been there for as long as he has and does the same. Niall smiles as they all feast on much needed nutrients. The blond momentarily thanks Zayn in his head for getting the biggest sized pizza at Domino's.

 

—

 

**@1DUpdatesOnline:** _The blond guy from last night was seen in the Blue Zone queue at Croker._

**@1DUpdatesOnline:** _He was bought pizza by 'Zack' and was asked by the guard if it was from a special someone! :O_

**@1DUpdatesOnline:** _He replied with: "One day, if things go well."_

 

 

**@IREUpdates1D:** _some serious shit's goin on in Croker rn_

 

 

**@Updates1D_:** _WHO THE FUCK IS THIS GUY AND WHAT IS HE TO ZAYN_

 

 

**@beardzayn:** _“zack” its zen_

 

 

**@Alert1D:** _HIS NAME WAS FUCKING CALLED OUT FOR THE PIZZA_

**@Alert1D:** _WHY DIDN'T ANYONE LISTEN CLOSELY????????_

 

**@paynefulleeyum: _@Alert1D_** _his name was something Horan?????_

 

 

**@Alert1D:** _SOMEBODY AT THE CONCERT FIND A BLOND GUY CALLED HORAN_

 

—

 

Niall's stood by the side of the runway with a smile on his face. He's still hungry, practically eating the crumbs from the bottom of his crisp packet but his excitement is quickly rushing back to him. He's nervous as fuck every time someone approaches him and he decides him and Zayn need to talk when three fans approach him, asking him what his last name was. 

Of course, he’s seen those tweets – the fans are fucking _on_ to them – and Zayn needs to tone it down a hell of a lot just so Niall can survive his concert. It’s a conversation needed to be done in person so Niall just ignores his texts, which was difficult considering Zayn seemed so eager to get him to reply. He’s tried all the tactics.

 

He tried being cute: _I thought i was your favourite :( </3_

He tried being sexy: _does a certain someone need a spank later? ;)_

He even tried being intimidating, which only made Niall laugh: _niall im gona beat your arse if you dont reply in the next 5 mins_

 

It's been like this for the past three hours and Niall has a total of 275 unread messages. Zayn Malik, it turns out, was actually resistible. To Niall at least.

 

—

 

By the time 5 Seconds of Summer come off stage, Niall replies with one single message: _we need to talk later x_

Once it says it's delivered, Niall smirks and waits for the five boys to take the stage, knowing that one boy will slowly self destruct just wondering about what that text meant. 

And Niall’s right. Because by the time they come out singing _Midnight Memories_ , Zayn looks jumbled and off his game. He's wearing white – and looks hella fine in it – and is constantly searching the crowd. He also keeps fiddling with his in-ear, though Niall isn’t sure if it’s because of how loud the crowd was. Niall also notices him scratching at his beard when fans scream his name, nervously smiling before catching up with the lyrics. Something that stands out the most to Niall, and probably to everyone in the stadium is how Zayn loses where he is in the song at least once every two tracks and Niall really regrets not telling him where he is. 

He tries to get noticed, shouting Zayn's name whenever he's near and after a few minutes he decides his voice can't compete with the squeals sounding all around him, and he gives up.

 

He waits until the encore.

 

—

 

**Niall:** _When your in the middle of the runway, look at the blue_

 

**Zayn:** _you arse, ive been lookin there for the whole 19 songs!!_

 

**Niall:** _Look harder mate hahah_

**Niall:** _You look like a proper mess out there , care to tell me why ?_

 

**Zayn:** _am i that obvious aha :)_

**Zayn:** _it just comforts me if i know where you are_

 

**Niall:** _< 3_

 

**Zayn:** _:) <3 x_

 

—

 

They come out for _You & I_ and Zayn looks determined, jogging ahead of the other boys and down the runway in search for Niall. He sings his verse with more effort than before the encore and Niall can see he's really trying to look like he's pumped and excited but right as soon as Louis starts singing, Zayn stands in the middle of the runway and blatantly searches. 

Niall's jumping up and down and waving his arms through the chorus and he doesn't know if Zayn is blind because he's even flashing the light of his phone in his face but Zayn just doesn't see him. 

Not until few seconds before Zayn's high note that they met eyes and relief visibly floods the singer, breathing in and placing a hand on his stomach. He sings his heart out and the screams surrounding him make him momentarily deaf. Zayn stretches the note out before fading it into a series of riffs, facing scrunching as his voice leaves him. He smiles and looks to where Niall’s stood, eyebrows raised and lips stretched wide. He shoots the lad a thumbs up to which Zayn beams at, smiling and popping his in ear back in before flushing and walking away. 

He comes back during _Story Of My Life_ and stands to fully face Niall this time, who isn’t very close to the front, more like three or four rows back, but it doesn't stop Zayn from smiling behind his mic and reaching his hand out to him.

 

And it pisses Niall off.

 

Zayn isn’t _allowed_ to do this, he doesn't have the right to be this cute and this hot and make Niall feel all special when he’s convinced that he’s nothing more to him than a groupie.

 

—

 

"Ah, finally!" Louis sighs dramatically, swinging his arm around Niall and leading him into Sarah's Kitchen. "I'm glad you're here now, did you see how much of a mess Zayn was?" 

Niall frowns. "Don't remind me. Keep thinkin' that it was my fault..." 

"It wasn't." Louis looks down at him with his brows knitted worriedly together. "Just goes to show how much of an impact you have on him, don't ya think?" He smirks and Niall barely has time to think of what he's saying before Zayn comes through the doors with a clear scowl on his face. 

"I saw about twelve parents glare at me out there, was I really that bad?" It’s obvious the question isn’t directed to anybody but himself but Niall jumps in anyway, ripping himself away from Louis' arm. 

"No! You were great, don't say that. I loved every second of it." He says, coming by Zayn's side and looking up at him earnestly. 

Zayn rolls his eyes. "Of course you did, you're the one who was hiding out in the crowd for nineteen songs…" He mutters to himself as he takes off his shirt, not meaning to be heard, but Niall hears anyway, beginning to pout a bit as he scratches at his head. "I'm sorry?" 

Zayn sighs, tugging on a sweater and looking at Niall as if to say, "what am I gonna do with you?" Niall just bats his lashes at him, not really knowing what else to do but hope Zayn forgives him. All he wanted was to talk to him, but apparently that was a bad idea. 

He stares at Zayn for a minute, watches his eyelashes fluttering over high, tan cheeks. He's mesmerised, really. The photos on his tumblr dashboard are nothing compared to real life. 

Zayn breathes out roughly. 

"You're forgiven." That didn't last very long. "But later, you're gonna have to show me how sorry you really are." His voice lowers, eyes sparkling suggestively as he bounces his eyebrows.

 

Niall isn't even sure if he wants to continue.

 

—

 

"Fuck!" The blond releases an unrestricted scream. Zayn had him on his hands in knees but Niall's face ended up buried into the mattress, his ass in the air and his fingers fisting the sheets so hard his knuckles went white. "Zayn, shit, you're so– _oh my god_." 

Zayn turned him into a babbling mess, one hand gripping his hips while the other pumps at Niall's cock, not even bothering to reply since all of his focus was aimed at showing Niall how frustrated he really is. 

"You regret not showing yourself?" He finally utters out and the paler lad would hardly class this as a punishment, his prostate pleasurably abused by the power of Zayn's hips. 

"I'm s-sorry." He's not; he really isn't. He kinda wants to do it again the next concert.

"You feel so good, Ni," Zayn collapses against his back, their sweaty bodies rubbing together with Zayn's lips grazing against the boy's neck. Niall whines. "Never heard anyone make the sounds that you do." 

Niall would say the same for Zayn, referring to his singing of course, but that's a little too romantic for him to say in bed with his "friend". If they even are friends, that is. 

His negative thoughts deter him from moaning and Zayn slows down, hands caressing his arms and thighs, asking if he was okay. The younger just shakes his head, pushing his hips up against him to return back to his old speed and somehow, some time during what they were doing, Niall comes. 

Zayn's pushed over the edge just minutes after, letting out a shameless groan of his own and spilling into the condom.

 

 

Afterwards, Zayn cleans Niall up while he watches him, blue eyes wide with awe and wonder as personified perfection swipes a wet flannel across his stomach and chest (Niall came a lot tonight, for some odd unknown reason). 

When Zayn tucks himself behind Niall, being the big spoon that he likes to be, the blond finds himself blurting out something he’s kept concealed for too long. "Why are you still with me?" 

Zayn freezes, arm stiffening where it’s curled around Niall's waist. "What do you mean?" 

Niall takes a breath and turns in Zayn's hold, bravely staring into his eyes with obvious determination. For what, Zayn isn't aware of.

"I'm just a fan, aren't I? Why haven't you left me yet? Or better yet, why won’t you let me leave?" When Niall only gets silence he makes sure to add on more of his hidden thoughts, thoughts that have seemingly been hidden for way too long. "It's been two? Three nights in a row, aren't you sick of me?" 

When Zayn's arm leaves its place on Niall's hip, the blond's strong front weakens just a smidge. The invisible wall between them is up again, only this time, it’s worse. There’s an electric current thrumming through said wall and Niall knows that this time if he tried to cross the barrier, he’ll receive the shock of his life. 

Zayn narrows his eyes at him, lips pursed. "I've done this many times before, Niall. It isn't some sort of special treatment."

 

Ouch. Niall swallows thickly. His chest is burning.

 

"Oh." He doesn't say anything else, and he doesn't have to. Zayn senses the disappointment in his tone and pulls away, the space between them increasing. Niall's hand automatically reaches out for him but he stops himself; reminds himself he can’t cross the non existent wall in between them. 

"You better not be feeling shit, or this is all over." 

Niall lies. "I'm not," he pauses. "I won't."

Zayn notices the way the younger boy curls into himself and clenches his jaw in fury. "You're lying." 

Niall begins to get a little pissed off as well. "So fucking what if I am?" 

Zayn only shuffles away further but Niall sits up, angered. "No, seriously, tell me why is it so bad to have– to have _feelings_ for you? Is it because you won't return them? Good for you, I don't care. Or is it just because I'm only an ass to fuck?" Niall wants to touch him again but he's afraid of what will happen; knows what _could_ happen but he doesn’t want to think about it. "Just…tell me why it's such a horrible idea." 

Zayn stares into his eyes in a way that gives Niall hope but it's quickly crushed when darkness covers their sincerity. "Get out." 

Niall's mouth gapes open. "You're not serious."

 

"Get the fuck out or I'll call security."

 

The blond grits his teeth, face hot with fury. "In case you've forgotten, you so generously sold my room in favour of me sleeping here." He huffs out, not moving from his space as he lies down and folds his arms over his chest in an almost child-like way. "Have you really done this with loads of other fans, Malik?" He sneers. "Or are _you_ lying, too." 

Hazel eyes widen briefly before they flash with the same fury Niall's were displaying. It's obvious what his decision is, and Niall doesn’t even give two shits.

Zayn gets up, pulls his boxers on before snatching a pair of joggers out from his suitcase. Niall hears him slamming the front door closed and the blond merely emits a weak breath he didn't even know he was holding. He pulls the duvet up over his shoulders and turns on his side, drifting to sleep.

 

—

 

Niall hears Zayn come in later but he doesn't know at what time. All he acknowledges is the sweet blend of weed and alcohol (he was probably with Louis) before Zayn's falling onto the furthest side of the bed. He hears deep breaths leave him just minutes after

 

Niall silently wonders if Zayn told Louis the things he wished he'd said.

 

—

 

Niall does yesterday's routine of getting up early, except this time he throws a few things into his suitcase to save time later. It is, of course, their last night together. Their last night _ever_ you could say because Niall doubts they'll ever meet again; ever _want_ to meet again as well. 

When Niall comes out of the shower, Zayn's leaning against the headboard, awake and staring down at the screen of his phone but his eyes fall on Niall's once he makes his appearance known by stepping out, dripping wet. 

The blond undoubtedly notices the way Zayn wets his lips as he crosses the room to get the clothes he laid on top of his case. The older shocks him by breaking the silence. 

"Where are you going?" He asks, but he probably already knows. 

"I'm going to queue." Niall simply states, slipping a shirt on over his head. 

It was a fucking stupid question, in Niall's opinion, it wasn't like he was going to go anywhere else. Did Zayn think he was going to run away? _Please_. As infuriated as the guy is, he still loves 3.5 members of the band and Niall’s definitely not wasting his momma's cash on tickets that aren't gonna be used. 

It's silent after that, Zayn pretending to go on his phone when really, Niall can see all the brief glances he's shooting him. The blond doesn't pay it as much attention as he wants to, grabbing the keycard and swiping his way out of the hotel room in just jeans, converse and a plain old t-shirt; also ignoring Zayn's call of: "You're gonna get cold!"

 

Pfft. Who is he, Niall's mother?

 

—

 

**@daddyerection:** _HE'S HERE OH MY FUCKING GOD I SEE HIM_

**@daddyerection:** _THE HORAN GUY IS IN THE LINE FUCK I KNEW HE'D BE HERE I FUCKING //KNEW// IT_

**@daddyerection:** _HE'S STANDING OPPOSITE THE BAR THING RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME ONG_

**@daddyerection:** _HE'S ALONE AND ON HIS PHONE I THINK HE'S ON TWITTER_

 

**@pringlestoube: _@daddyerection_** _TALK TO HIM FUCKING TALK TO HIM_

 

 

**@1DUpdates_IRE:** _HORAN GUY IS SPOTTED IN THE BLUE STANDING ZONE QUEUE FOR THE SECOND NIGHT IN A ROW_

**@1DUpdates_IRE:** _why isn’t anyone taking pictures smh_

 

 

**@daddyerection:** _I AM TALKING TO HIM RN_

**@daddyerection:** _asked him if he had twitter and he said 'whats twitter' don't lie to me mate_

**@daddyerection:** _he's adorable aw he's so nice aww_

 

**@69larry: _@daddyerection_** _WE DON'T CARE IF HE'S NICE ASK HIM WHAT HE IS TO THE BOYS_

 

**@daddyerection: _@69larry_** _HE SAID HE WAS JUST A FAN_

 

**@69larry: _@daddyerection_** _HE CAN'T BE HE'S LYING HES A FILTHY LIAR_

 

**@daddyerection: _@69larry_** _he can't be lying, he looked really sad when he said it :(_

 

 

**@1DUpdatesWW:** _Horan guy said he was just a fan to the boys. (via_ **_@daddyerection_ ** _)_

 

 

**@zaynjaweedmalik:** _"just a fan" y'all fuckin KNOW he lyin_

 

**@japantieszayn:** _yo i think daddy is gay idk don't judge k this horan guy fishy af_

 

**@zaynjaweedmalik: _@japantieszayn_** _what are you saying_

 

**@japantieszayn: _@zaynjaweedmalik_** _maybe horan is something to zayn u saw how lost he was at the last gig_

 

**@zaynjaweedmalik: _@japantieszayn_** _no stfu zerrie is real_

 

 

**@HarryChrist:** _This fandom is falling apart thanks to you_ **_@zaynmalik_ ** _and your irish bitch congrats_

 

—

 

ZAYN AF _favourited this_  

**@zaynmalik:** _Last show at croker :(_  

**@zaynmalik:** _Lets make some memories yeh ?_

 

 

—

 

After changing his display name because people will undoubtedly know it's him, he locks his phone and hugs himself, regretting not bringing a coat like Zayn warned. He fights the cold and chats with the fans surrounding him, one girl asking who he is to the boys and maybe he answers a little bit too quickly. 

"I'm just a fan." He replies with a sad smile, ignoring how he just sort of maybe quite possibly confirmed his appearances with the band while simultaneously assuring the fandom that he was nothing to them, not even a friend. 

Fuck sake, he should've just answered with an extremely defensive: "why would I know One Direction?" That at least would’ve gotten everyone off his ass. 

The girl looked upset, her phone hanging loose in her hand before she pats him on the back, telling him they all are. She goes back to her phone after that, looking at the screen with wide eyes and Niall knows what she is doing, out of personal experience. From an outsider's point of view, the image of someone frantically tweeting is quite amusing. No wonder he got a few chuckles from his relatives when he was tweeting Louis on his birthday while they had christmas dinner. 

He doesn't talk to anyone after that, plugging in his earphones and idly playing with the festival style wristband he purchased from the merch store around the corner. He hums quietly to himself even though no music flowed into his ears, feeling nothing but impatient because all he wanted in that moment was to be inside.

 

—

 

[3:24PM]

**Zayn:** _how are you ?_  

**Niall:** _I'm ok_  

**Zayn:** _dyu want me to send pizza again aha ;)_  

**Niall:** _No , i'm fine_  

**Zayn:** _..ok_ (Read 3:26pm)

  

[3:48PM]

**Niall:** _< 3 _(Read 3:50pm)

 

—

 

Despite the message incident (he felt bad for ignoring him but goddamn Zayn for doing it back), Niall feels just the slightest bit happier by the time he reaches the stage, makes sure he's at the very front so Zayn won't freak out like the night before. Niall then proceeds to mentally slap himself for thinking about Zayn when they're supposed to be mad at each other.

 

—

 

Zayn spots him like light speed and Niall sends a weak smile his way, the singer staring at him intently, looking deep in thought, before nodding.

 

That's _it_. That's all Niall got. 

A fucking _nod_.

 

—

 

Niall doesn't enjoy the concert as much as the other two, but he does cry a little because it's the _last concert_ , he's never gonna see them again after this.

 

_Right Now_ is playing when Niall starts to lose the ability to feel his toes or fingers. It's raining lightly and people around him are screaming and having the time of their lives but he's there hugging himself. He's been here since 10am and the moment would be perfect if Spongebob was there because Niall is practically wearing Coral Blue #5 because he’s _that_ cold. 

Harry throws him a grin and hugs himself jokingly, pretending to shiver but once Niall sees, he smiles and Harry swiftly notices how his teeth are chattering. His jokey self is quickly swapped with his motherly side, mouthing to Niall if he was okay and the blond weakly nods though it was clear he wasn't. 

Harry disappears and Niall's eyes stay in the spot he used to be, feeling a few stares on him. Time passes and he tries to hide and warm his face by staring at his feet but a hand is tapping at his shoulder and he's forced to look up. 

One of the security guards stare at him concernedly and Niall was about to annoyingly reassure him that he was fine until he sees the black hoodie the man was offering him. The blond looks surprised, swiping a piece of his wet fringe away from his forehead so he could stare at the fabric properly. The man smiles a tight lipped smile at him. "This is from Harry." 

Niall's head swings around to where Harry was, the lad too busy singing the lyrics to notice but the blond quickly catches the gaze of Zayn, who stands there slightly damp and looking as worried as ever. Harry must've told him. 

Niall gratefully accepts the hoodie, slipping it on and sliding the sleeves so they cover his hands. He brings his fists to his nose and takes a big sniff, knowing exactly whose hoodie it is, for some reason. 

He looks back up to see if Zayn is still staring and he was. Niall throws him a smile, mouthing a shy 'thank you' that has Zayn beaming throughout the rest of the song. And undeniably throughout the whole concert.

 

—

 

The very same body guard leads Niall backstage, where Zayn stands, face looking not so much as happy as he was during the show. Niall frowns, suddenly not wanting to be there. 

The guard leaves them alone and Niall catches sight of all the people working staring at them while they walk to who knows where. Zayn has said nothing to Niall to explain to him where they’re going, but the blond isn’t going to break the silence because he really doesn’t give a fuck. He isn’t bothered and he doesn’t want to make things awkward. 

His mind is momentarily lost in thought as they continue to turn around corner after corner, the blond suddenly remembering that girl in the line that so obviously knew who he was. He's aware most of the fandom knows his last name (why he changed his display from _Niall Horan-Malik_ to _ZAYN AF_ ) and he's seen the things they're tweeting about him. It's not as chaotic as he expected.

 

—

 

**@bootsftharry:** _OKAY WHO THE FUCK IS THIS_ **_HORAN_ ** _GUY AND WHY ARE HIM AND ZAYN SEEMINGLY A THING_

 

**@louvelyliam:** _people should hAVE TAKEN A BLOODY PICTURE OF THE_ **_HORAN_ ** _FUCKER_

 

**@entiSINGzayn:** _we don't even freakin kno what "_ ** _horan_** _" looks like I'm so disappointed in this fandom the only thing we have is a blurry candid_

 

**@lilowlowlow:** _three nights in a row. he went all three nights and we have no clear pictures of him. this_ ** _horan_** _guy is good_

 

**@teenidleharry:** _WTF I WENT TO CROKER TONIGHT WHAT IF THAT_ **_HORAN_ ** _GUY WAS THERE WISKSKBA_

 

**@autoumnleaves:** _I'm going to murder someone it's the last night of croker and zayn is apparently gay with this_ **_horan_ ** _guy and we don't even know who he is_

 

**@floralharry: _"@zaynmalik:_** _Last show at croker :(_ ** _"_ ** _WHY ARE YOU UPSET HUH HUH IS IT BC /_ ** _HORAN_** _/_

 

—

 

Or maybe it's because he hasn't been on twitter for so long that he's missing out on all the actual hysteria.

 

The stares begin to burn holes in Niall's skin and he finally looks around to meet the eyes of more than a dozen curious gazes. 

Niall thinks it's the hoodie at first, but it’s when he bumps into one of the stage workers, a guy in his mid-twenties wearing a black polo-shirt and a headset, that Niall finally realises that Zayn has an arm around his waist. How did he not notice that? 

His thoughts are broken when he's led into an empty dressing room, not only void of people, but void of tools, clothes and decorations; nothing but a few tables and a large couch inside of it. Niall's eyebrows raise in question, this room must not be in use. 

Zayn has a water bottle in his hand that he drinks out of before plopping himself down on the couch, staring at Niall expectantly. 

"Why did you send the guard?" The blond doesn't hesitate to ask. 

Zayn rolls his eyes. "How do you even know if it was me?" 

"It's your hoodie." Niall answers simply. 

"Hmm, how could you tell?" 

He slumps a little, frowning before averting his eyes elsewhere. "It has your smell." 

Zayn just laughs. "Fans will be fans, I guess." 

Niall scowls at that. "Why are you being such a dick? You sent Harry to give me your hoodie and I'm thankful for that, now why are you acting like I'm suddenly so insignificant?" 

There's a beat of silence, Niall's fists clenched by his sides as he glares at the annoyingly attractive yet currently an asshole Zayn Malik whose fucked him for the past three nights long, hard and fast without fail. Niall feels sick just now thinking about it.

 

"You are though, aren't you?"

 

The blond stills. Niall feels every little strength he has crumble into nothing. His confidence ripped from him as well as his dignity. 

"Say that next time you're sucking my dick, you fuckin' cunt!" He drags himself away from the intensity of Zayn's stare, warm tears building in his eyes as he turns and heads for the door. _What an asshole_ , he thinks as he turns the knob, only for a hand to slam against the wood and shut it once it’s an inch open. 

"You're not really gonna leave, are you?" Zayn's suddenly closer than before, his breath fanning against the nape of Niall's neck. He shivers involuntarily. 

"I will once you stop blocking the fucking door." 

"Say goodbye?" His lips brush Niall's skin and it's pissing him off, how he leans into it just a little. He hopes Zayn doesn't notice. 

Niall inhales through his nose, staring down at the black sleeves of Zayn's hoodie, wanting to so badly turn around and kiss his face (maybe punch him too) but he stops himself. If Zayn thinks he’s so insignificant, why is he always clinging onto him? Why is he so needy? He says the most mean things but then chases after Niall when he technically has every right to walk away. But maybe that's just what Zayn wants. It's their last night after all, maybe Zayn just doesn't want Niall to get as attached as he is.

The blond feels oxygen rush past his lips. What if Zayn _wants_ Niall to hate him? If they were closer than they are now, their chances of a goodbye would have been painful and it would be much harder to let go. What if this was Zayn's plan all along but it hurt him just as much as it hurt Niall? 

The blond nibbles at his lip. "Goodbye." He whispers, Zayn's palm that lay on the door twitching as Niall ducks under his arm and leaves to god knows where. 

He'll go through with this plan; he'll allow the way Zayn was acting towards him only because maybe it's what's best. Still, Niall doesn’t promise anything to himself. He can't promise that the morning after, when they both leave, that the goodbye that they'll share won't hurt him, it'll be too easy of a promise to break.

 

  

 

The blond later finds himself with Harry, laughing at his jokes and eating a banana the right way. Niall discovers that it was in fact Zayn's hoodie and although Harry was the one to send the guard, it was at Zayn's request that the guard be given his clothes; not Harry's. Niall found himself smiling at that.

 

Zayn _does_ care, he just doesn't _want_ to.

 

Niall's laying on the sofa while Harry's shirtless, hair wrapped in a bandana and hyper as hell; it differs to how Niall is, nothing but tired. He's yawning and rubbing at his eyes and wanting to just go home right now and sleep in his old bed. He's starting to miss Mullingar and his family, not that hanging out with his favourite band isn’t fun – not that he got to hang out with them that much in the first place — but home just seems perfect, especially with the situation he’s in right now. His parents haven't texted much, just the occasional _how is everything?_ and _are you okay?_ and not to mention the cute as fuck _did you enjoy the concert?_ texts from his dad.

 

They have no idea how insane Niall's life is right now, and he's not even sure if he wants them to know what's happened.

 

"Niall?" Louis' voice snaps him from his reverie. Two pairs of blue eyes meet and the blond sits up, blinking blearily. "Yeah?" 

"We're heading to the vans in a bit and we're planning to go down to the bar. Wanna come with?" Louis looks to Harry, who nods in agreement before looking at Niall. 

A drink sounds heavenly right now (sleep does as well but c'mon, _pints_ ), so he nods, making grabby hands so Harry can pull him up. A small shriek leaves Niall when the older lad suddenly tugs him to his feet and picks him up, skinny legs wrapping themselves around his waist. When Harry starts jogging towards the exit, Niall can't help the loud cackle that leaves him as he bounces in Harry's arms. He almost feels like a part of their family. 

His laugh bounces off the walls and echoes, feeling the happiest he's been in three days. He finds it quite hilarious how Louis' running after the both of them. Niall pumps his fist in the air, taunting the oldest member of the band. "Can't even catch up, can you Tommo?" 

The glint in his eye is intimidating to say the least, Niall's insulting chants flaring his determination as he dashes ahead of them and disappearing out the exit. 

Niall and Harry reach the exit eventually, the taller resting Niall on his feet and muttering an "Oh no.." once they see the multiple hoards of fans lined up behind a barrier, guards trying to contain them but it was too late. The screams get louder once they see Louis, who was there first, smiling and waving at them, while Harry and Niall stay the slightest bit hidden. 

Zayn appears out of nowhere, shocking Niall who yelps and jumps closer to Harry, remembering what happened earlier between them and still not over it. Zayn rolls his eyes, hand coming to gently hold Niall's elbow. "Liam's already at the hotel and Louis' distracting some of the fans but the line's proper huge," he looks to Harry. "Can you handle the other side?" 

Harry looks willing and ready, a grin on his face as he nods before turning back to Niall. "You gonna be okay?" The blond just nods while staring outside. 

They’re hidden from where they’re stood, a large bus to their left that blocks their view of the fans but they all can tell they were there; you could hear them loud and clear. 

A guard escorts Harry out and the squeals of his name are enough to make Niall deaf. The blond puffs out a breath, feeling the fabric of his hood come over his head. Zayn looks down at him, cupping his cheek and Niall shamelessly leans into it. "The van's around the corner, turn left and just keep your face hidden, I'll guide you to where you need to be." 

"What about Louis and Harry?" 

"They'll catch up." Zayn nudges him forward, signalling for him to start walking. Niall feels nervous but excited at the same time, a part of him quite likes this idea of fame but another part of him knows most of that fame is out of either curiosity or pure hate. 

"C'mon." Zayn urges. Niall stands to the singer's left, holding his hood up while Zayn's palm softly lay on his middle-back. 

Just like with Louis and Harry, noise erupts from the large crowd of fans, all eager to catch Zayn's attention.

 

Once they're past the huge bus, Niall gulps, noticing how far away the vans are and how there are hundreds of them grouped up in a line that stretches right across the road. Zayn tries to shield Niall away from their eyes but it’s quite obvious that the older boy’s hiding him. The blond feels his whole body run cold when someone screams 'HORAN!' out at him. Niall stops walking and looks towards the fans, hood slipping just a bit so some of his blond hair was visible. Zayn, who's a few steps ahead of him, stops and tells Niall to hurry up. 

Niall bites his lip and aims his head down but then someone shouts his name again, this time, his first name.

 

"NIALL!"

 

The van is only a few metres away but Niall can't help stopping once more. How the fuck do they know that? 

"Ignore them, keep going." Zayn's saying to him but – he _can't_ , is the problem. Not when they know his full name. It practically scares him out of his wits, how him and Zayn are saying their goodbyes tomorrow and instead of wanting to forget it all, Niall's going to see all these things about _NiallandZayn_ and while that used to be a dream come true, right now it's kind of his worst nightmare. 

This time, the only way to cut Niall out of his thoughts is not by calling out his name or barking out instructions; Zayn decides to just not say anything at all and instead, holds his hand out for him. 

Well. Niall was certainly not rejecting _that_ offer, as angry as he so previously was. Zayn may have been the one to cause the pain but maybe he can be the one to make it better too. 

Niall smiles weakly and places his hand in his before he quickly walks forward, pressing his lips together tightly. He barely waves at the fans before he opens Niall's door and ushers him inside. Niall turns and looks up at him with a frown, locked in a spacious sandwich inside Zayn's arms and the van that he refused to get into, "You should go sign something." He throws his thumb in their way. 

Zayn looks pissed off. "Niall, now is–" 

"They've probably been waiting here for hours and Louis and Harry aren't going to make all of them," he furrows his brows together in annoyance. "Th'least you could do is go say hi or take a few pictures." 

"Can we please discuss this inside the van?" Niall huffs before taking his seat inside, glaring at Zayn. "If you don't go over there, I will." 

"Tell 'em, Niall." Shouts Paul from the front seat next to the driver, who looked just as amused. Niall smirks in satisfaction, staring up at Zayn with challenging eyes. 

Zayn's holding the sliding door open with a face that clearly says _are you really telling me off right now?_ and by the looks of Niall's face, whose expression replies with _yes, I fucking am_ , the blond isn't going anywhere until Zayn’s interacted with his fans. 

The older sighs, looking over at the crowd before staring at Niall, who’s seated warmly inside the vehicle with his arms over his chest, petulantly refusing to let Zayn in the van unless he moves towards the fans' general direction. 

Zayn ducks his head inside and bites his lip. "They're gonna ask about you..." He warns but Niall just shrugs, fingers playing with the string of his (Zayn's) hoodie. 

"Answer, don't answer. Either way, you'll make their whole lives just by sharing your air with them." 

That causes a soft smile to curl around Zayn's lips and he leans back, looking out at the stretch of fans and seeing Harry and Louis occupied quite a distance away. He beams fondly at the boy in his hoodie, "Okay, alright." 

Niall feels accomplished, flushing a little at the way Paul stares at both of them. "You're gonna do it?" 

"Why not?" He crinkles his nose before letting go of the door and letting it slide closed. Niall hops himself up onto his knees, hands resting on the chair as he stares out the tinted window at the back, chuckling along to Paul's laughter in the front.

 

 

Zayn smiles as he makes his way over to them, seeing some cry as he gets closer. "How are yous?" He asks kindly. He gets a whole bunch of different replies, some he didn't understand because their accents were so thick that it makes him chuckle a bit. He goes along the line and takes a few selfies, records one message for a fan who is in hospital and has a right laugh with this one girl who tells him she came all the way from the UK, which was pretty sick.

 

Of course, the question is indeed inevitable.

 

He's in the middle of signing something when someone asks: "Zayn! Who's Horan?" 

It makes his hand twitch and his signature fail and it looks more like a scribble than his name; he feels his throat go dry. "Umm," he occupies himself by hugging some fans, not knowing who asked it so he keeps his eyes down. "He's a friend of ours." That’s a good enough answer, right? 

"No bullshit!" Someone screams and Zayn laughs, shrugging his shoulders. 

"I'm not lying, he's a friend of the band. Met him a few nights ago." He writes his name on a girl's arm who promises she'll get it tattooed. 

"Was he the one who made you come over here?" 

Zayn stops and looks around to where the question came from, smirks a bit and nods shyly. "Said he'd come over here if I didn't, so." 

"Why are you hiding him?" This question is from a girl at the front, who's phone case Zayn had just signed and it makes him still. He doesn't know why, actually. If he’s so bravely announcing him and Niall's friendship, why is he so shameful of him? No, not shameful. _What's the word?_  

"I don't know I just–" he pauses, steps back a bit as he slides his hands in his pockets to think. "Wanna protect him, I guess." _Protective_ , that's it.

 

They all coo.

 

It’s the first thing that comes to his mind and he isn’t even aware that his mouth was forming those words. Zayn scratches the back of his head, sheepishly. "Did you all have fun tonight?" He attempts to switch topic and while some fans nodded, other fans were on a far more different page. 

"Does he have twitter?" 

Zayn clicks his tongue. That's enough for tonight, he thinks. "Pretty sure you all can find that out. I'm gonna go, alright? See ya. Hope you's get home safe." He smiles a genuine smile before turning back to face the van, ignoring one's shout of: "What about Perrie?!" because he has too many problems to deal with right now, and _that_ is one that he wants to ignore.

 

Once he closes the van door, Niall's face is burning red. Zayn scrunches his brows together worriedly. "What's wrong?" 

The blond buckles his seatbelt, gulping a bit.

 

—

 

**@muscleliam:** _HORAN GUY IS HERE OH MY GOD_

**@muscleliam:** _HARRY AND LOUIS CAME OVER TO TALK TO FANS AND SHIT BUT ZAYN WAS WITH HORAN GUY_

**@muscleliam:** _FUCK I THINK LARRY WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A DISTRACTION BUT WE ALL SAW_

 

 

**@badboiizen:** _i really dont like this horan guy :/_

**@badboiizen:** _its obvs he likes zayn if hes hoping zayn will be his “special someone” one day and its just really urgefiofje_

**@badboiizen:** _like hes interfering with zayn and pez’s relationship am i the only one that thinks this is a problem???_

 

**@icesloushy: _@badboiizen_** _yes_

 

 

**@parmahamlou:** _OH MY GOD ZAYNS WITH HORAN GUY_

**@parmahamlou:** _HORAN GUY IS WEARING A HOODIE I THINK IT'S ZAYN'S I'MSM SWAEATIDNG_

 

**@chouchoopayne: _@parmahamlou_** _how do u kno its him tho_

 

**@parmahamlou: _@chouchoopayne_** _someone shouted HORAN and he looked over it's definitely him_

 

 

**@freakzayn:** _MY SUSNHIEN TALKDE TO MEH_

**@freakzayn:** _IAM SHAKIDNG AND CHRYING_

**@freakzayn:** _we asked him about horan and he went all blushy .. i would b jealous but that was cute af_

**@freakzayn:** _Fan: "why are you hiding him?" Zayn: "idk i just.. wanna protect him i guess"_

**@freakzayn:** _THATS FUCKING ADORABLE_

**@freakzayn:** _NO BUT HORAN MADE HIM INTERACT WITH FANS THATS SO???_

 

 

**@Updates1D:** _The guy who was with Zayn is called Niall Horan! (via insider)_

**@Updates1D:** _Zayn offered Niall his hand when they were walking past fans and Niall stopped because someone shouted his name._

**@Updates1D:** _Zayn says that Niall is friends with the band and they met a few nights ago._

**@Updates1D:** _Niall made Zayn interact with fans: "Said he will if I didn't." - Zayn_

 

 

**@zourriam:** _if i see someone tweeting about that horan kid one more time I'm going to stab myself_

 

 

**@frouitcubeharry:** _NIALL. HIS NAME IS NIALL. NIALL FUCKING HORAN._

**@frouitcubeharry:** _WE ASKED LOUIS AND HE AVOIDED ALL THE QUESTIONS BUT_

**@frouitcubeharry:** _HARRY CAME OVER AND SAID THAT NIALL AND HIM WERE GOOD FRIENDS_

**@froutcubeharry:** _THEN HE SLAPPED HIS HAND OVER HIS MOUTH FUCK I LOVE HIM_

 

 

**@redtoubeliam:** _WAIT A FEW DAYS AGO ZAYN AND LIAM FOLLOWED SOMEONE WITH THE NAME “Niall Horan-Malik” I RMR CLEARLY_

**@redtoubeliam:** _IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW_

**@redtoubeliam:** _HES A FAN AND HAS TWITTRE SOEMEOEN FIDN HMI I FORGTO HSI @ NAEM_

 

 

**@zaynpayne:** _:/_

 

 

**@gangsterzayn:** _LIAM WASN'T THER BUT OH MY GODD ZAAAAAAYN fckUc_

**@gangsterzayn:** _HES SO BEAUTIFUL IN REAL LIFE ISNSMSKA_

**@gangsterzayn:** _SOMEONE SHOUTED NIALL AND HORAN GUY LOOKED I THINK THATS HIS NAME_

**@gangsterzayn:** _no but zayn told him to get in the van but niall(?) was pointing at fans aww he made him come over_

 

 

**@LouisCarrotQueen:** _Why is every1 so focused on this horan fan liek.. hes sersly irelevant_

 

 

**@gangsterzayn:** _once niall was in the van zayn ducked his head in and i think they kissed .._

 

**@princesslouiam: _@gangsterzayn_** _HOW DO U KNO_

 

**@gangsterzayn: _@princesslouiam_** _ZAYN PULLED BACK AND HE HAD THE FONDEST SMILE ON HIS FACE_

**@gangsterzayn: _@princesslouiam_** _THEN HE CAME OVER AND SIGNED SOME STUFF AND TALKED AND LOOKED EXTREMELY SATISFIED_

 

**@princesslouiam: _@gangsterzayn_** _FUCJ IYS SO RAEL_ _# **ziall** _

 

 

**@ZandP:** _wait what about perrie?? :(_

 

**@freaksIwt: _@ZandP_** _lmao who_

 

—

 

Niall forces a smile onto his face. "Nothing." 

Zayn eyes him for a beat before nodding his head at the driver who was already seated at the front. The vehicle starts to move and Niall watches as some fans try to run after them while some stay in hopes of meeting either Louis or Harry. 

Niall just sighs, a mile-long list already made in his head of all the things he'll miss when he goes back to Mullingar.

 

—

 

"Where are you guys going after this?" Niall asks while the van is in motion. 

"Stadium of Light in Sunderland, I think." Zayn answers, staring boredly out the window. "But that's not for another few days, it's on the 28th, so..." He trails off, voice quietening as he aims his eyes at the cars driving by outside. 

"So you're all gonna head home after this? Gonna go see family?" Niall smiles, trying to at least end their 'relationship' on good terms but _god_ , Zayn’s making things so difficult. They _tried_ to be mad at each other, but they all knew how shit that went. 

"Uh, well." He cleared his throat. "Was planning to drop by Perrie's house to explain some things," Zayn breathes out, scratching at his beard. Niall nods along, agreeing that the poor girl is probably confused. He remembers her living in the North-East and Newcastle just so happened to be a few metro stops away from Sunderland. 

"Yeah, probably should." Niall chuckles awkwardly. Zayn bites his lip, gaze connecting with Niall's while he plays with the rings on his fingers. "She's been asking about you." 

Blue eyes grow wide. "Oh." 

"Yeah." 

Niall gulps, "How did she find out?" 

The older lad looks hesitant before he returns his stare back to the view outside. "I told her." 

You can almost feel how awkward things quickly get and Niall doesn’t like it at all. Just her name makes him feel guilt even though Zayn had assured him they were nothing. "And what did you tell her?" 

Zayn shrugs. "That we're fucking." 

And just like that, Niall's snapped from his fantasies and brought back into a harsh reality. He grimaces before fighting back a whimper. " _Were_ fucking." He corrects, but Zayn looks doubtful.

 

"Save your voice for later, babe." He smugly mumbles, Niall ignoring his implications in favour of admiring the pretty midnight view of Dublin.

 

 

They arrive at the hotel at around midnight and of course more fans have stayed outside. Niall is quite shocked at the numbers. He would have thought that the hotel manager would've at least told them to leave because it’s private property and there has to be something _illegal_ about this, surely. The blond furrowed his brows at his thoughts, he sounds like a snobby famous person, almost. 

Zayn rubs his temples, squeezing his eyes shut in annoyance. "Why do I always forget about this, this is like the third night in a row." Niall chuckles in remembrance; the night before was a little simpler because they had security guards with them and Niall wasn't spotted, looking a little out of place but not so much that people recognised him. 

"Just be glad it isn't as long of a walk as back at the stadium." Niall whispers, looking out at all the fans' happy faces. Zayn bobs his head in response. "I suppose so." He then turns to Paul, in hopes of an idea. 

Paul laughs to himself, "It's the last night, and a lot of people probably already know that Niall hangs out with you. Are we really going to bother hiding him again?" Worst advice ever but he's right in a way, why should they give a fuck? 

Zayn looks like he's considering it but Niall knows that as much as they want to believe that it'll blow over once they leave, it doesn't. Niall's aware that the fandom is pretty fucking persistent once they grab hold of something and are close to figuring out the truth. The conspiracies and other theories made about certain ships are ridiculous enough, and just earlier, when he was spotted with Zayn when they were walking towards the vans – the word spread through the internet like wildfire. Those update accounts surely didn't help either. 

"Hide me." Niall begs. "You really don't understand how fucked up things'll get if they catch a glimpse of my face." 

"I'm sure it's not that bad." Zayn waves his hand around but Niall grabs his wrist. 

"I don't want death threats thrown my way just because I was spotted standing next to you, okay? You said it yourself. Fans will be fans, and I know that some of those fans aren't going to let this go until they know every little thing about me." 

Zayn looks shocked at how commanding Niall was being, and if he’s honest, it turns him on a bit. He’s right though, and Paul seems to agree. "You have a point, Niall." He mumbles, opening the door and letting the screams in. "Put your hood up and head inside quickly, hide your face." He instructs as he gets out of the car. "And Zayn?" 

The darker lad raises his eyebrows at him questioningly. "Please wave at some fans and look happy. You'll make their whole lives just by sharing your air with them." He quotes Niall from earlier with a wink, laughing at the way the irish one blushes as he tugs his hood up. 

Paul closes the door and makes his way around to open Zayn's side. He comes out first, smiling a tight lipped smile and waving as more of them screamed. He bites his lip as he turns to assist Niall out of the van, the blond hopping out and thanking Paul for extending his hand out since he can't see very well. Trying to walk whilst holding his hood down was proven difficult. 

Niall cringes internally at the shouts of his and Zayn's name, keeping his head down and his eyes trained on the Converse on his feet. Paul makes his way in front of them, leading them past the fans and it’s all going _so well_. The order goes from Paul, to Zayn, then to Niall. And their small plan would have worked if Niall wasn’t in such a rush and tripped over nothing (why does he always do that?) and ended up tumbling backwards. 

Luckily (depends on how you look at it really), Zayn acknowledges his fall and turns fast enough to grab Niall's elbow as he balances himself on his feet. Camera clicks are sadly audible as the hood slips from Niall's head, Zayn still holding onto him tightly.

 

Perfect. Not only was Niall's aesthetic being spread all over social media sites, but they were going to be spread while he was in this super romantic, non-platonic looking position with Zayn. Fucking _perfect_.

 

"NIALL!" More people exclaimed and Niall huffed, ignoring Zayn's quizzical "You okay?" and just continued inside, a slight sting in his knee from the stumble but he was fine. When Niall gets to where Paul is stood waiting for them, he punches the man in the arm once he hears him chuckling. 

"It's not funny." He whines, turning to search for Zayn who seems to have occupied himself with his phone as he stood near the entrance, Harry and Louis only just emerging from the second van. 

Niall feels his phone vibrate in his pocket, and he hesitantly opens it up.

 

**704 people followed you** , it reads and he can visualise his life slowly falling apart. Maybe he’s overreacting, and once he goes back home, it won't be so bad. But then again, maybe he isn’t. He cringes at the 50+ mentions he’s getting.

 

It’s officially safe to say that the fandom has figured it out and found his account and connected it all together from the tweets he so previously tweeted. His phone is slowing down so he turns off his notifications for a moment, only allowing his alerts to go off when the people he follows favourite or retweet him or anything else. 

Niall winces as he scrolls through his mentions.

 

 

**@firefighterliam: _"@craicalaic: @livelaughlouis_** _already have! Haha_ **_"_ ** _YOU RODE ZAYNS DICK WTFJCVWG_

 

**@autoumnleaves: _@craicalaic_** _"youre more beautiful when you smile" WAS THAT FROM ZAYN_

 

**@harrysbouty: _@craicalaic_** _OH MY GOD YOURE NIALL HORAN_

 

**@louisloveszayn: _@craicalaic_** _I've followed you for almost a year how the fuck did i not figure this out_

 

**@zzaynal: _@craicalaic_** _niall i can't believe you didn't tell me :(_

 

**@hogwartslou: _@craicalaic_** _are you a groupie or are you something more??_

 

**@ziallftw: _@craicalaic_** _DO YOU LIKE MY @ NAME_

 

**@NiallHoran: _@craicalaic_** _this accounts fake ! I'm the real niall horan !_

 

**@dildou: _@craicalaic_** _how does it feel to be zayn maliks personal whore_

 

 

Well the last one definitely hurts. The accuracy of it all is definitely enough to make Niall tear up a bit but he's thinking positively, because this is him and Zayn's last night together, and he's just hoping, praying, _begging_ for everything to blow over even though he seriously doubts it will. 

He hasn't tweeted in a while, his last one being: _had a great last night at Croker !! Gonna miss these boys._

 

**@craicalaic:** _:(_

**@craicalaic:** _You found me ...._

 

There was no point in denying it or ignoring it, Niall isn’t going to pretend he doesn’t know what’s happening because he is a goddamn _fan account_ , for christ's sake, he can't carry on tweeting about wanting Louis to marry him or wanting to climb Harry like a tree or wanting to slide down the bumps of Liam Payne's abs because they’re sort of _friends_ now, and getting excited over your friends is weird. 

 

**@weboughtazou: _@craicalaic_** _I'm sorry everyone's like this, some people just need to respect other people's privacy_

 

**@craicalaic: _@weboughtazou_** _there's no such thing as privacy these days , specially if your even so much as acquaintances with th boys ;/_  

 

That tweets earns a lot of apologies from numerous amounts of people, and he checks his follower count to see it at **12,289**. He’s briefly shocked but then slowly realises that he hadn't checked his twitter properly ever since he first came into Zayn's hotel room and he relaxes; feels a little bit sad because he knows life won't be as normal as it used to be. Not that sleeping with Zayn had drastically changed his life (it did in a way), things were just going to be a lot less easy when he comes online. 

All these people know their secret, and Niall feels violated. Twitter is going to be his constant reminder of what had happened between them and Niall’s not sure if anyone is ever going to let this go. 

"You okay, Ni?" Liam comes up from behind him just as Niall is locking his phone and slipping it back into his pocket. "Yeah, I'm fine." He tells him, remembers how Zayn said Liam got here earlier than the rest of them. "Why'd you get here so early?" He asks, hoping it didn't come off as rude as he thought it did. 

"Wasn't bothered to stick around backstage so I came back to the bus. Y'know, called home and all that." Niall nods and coos a little, smiling at his answer. Paul comes over to pat Liam on the back, "You gonna join the rest of the lads for a drink? Last night after all." 

Liam's eyes light up. "'M always up for a drink," he chuckles. 

"That's good to hear, Payno." Louis comes walking in from the entrance, leaning up to wrap his arm around his mate's shoulder. "We wouldn't have such a good time if we didn't have your party animal self with us, now, would we?" 

"Too right, Lou. You joining us, Niall?" 

The blond nods his head and feels a little overwhelmed at the casual conversation they were having. He’s talking to two members of his favourite band as if they’re friends. Well, he doesn't know if they _are_ friends, he'd like to think they were, though. 

"Are we friends?" He accidentally blurts out to the two, his answer coming from Harry who gives a "Duh, obviously." even though it isn’t obvious at all, to Niall at least. He smiles in triumph. 

The blond doesn't even remember when Zayn got there but his presence is soon acknowledged a few minutes after when Niall notices the hovering warmth beside him. He’s also being really quiet, which may be normal to everyone but the blond can sense that there is something else.

 

 

They all migrate towards the bar around the corner, a few guards surrounding them as they make their way inside amongst all the other people who’re staying at the hotel. Harry disappears off somewhere while Liam and Louis head towards the pub, leaving Niall alone with Zayn. 

Niall nudges him awkwardly with his elbow. "Are you alright?" He asks, following Zayn and taking a seat next to him at a random table in the corner of the room. Niall has no idea why he'd choose a a table so far away from everyone else but what Zayn says next really explains quite a bit. 

"I got a text from management." Niall doesn't bother asking because Zayn seems to trust him enough to tell him anyway. "They want to meet me once I go back to London to discuss something. My guess is the something that they're talking about is us two." 

The blond sees him emit a shaky sigh before he rubs Zayn slowly on his back. Keep it platonic, he thinks to himself. 

"I don't think it's anything to worry about." He whispers honestly. "It's the last night, I'm going back to Mullingar tomorrow and you're going to continue with your tour. You won't ever see me ever again until maybe the next time you're in Ireland but that might not be until next year or the year after that and I may not even get tickets." Niall shrugs as if it didn't kill him. The distance, the countless articles of Zayn, the possibility of never seeing each other ever again. Niall’s okay, he's sure of it.

 

Zayn looks appreciative of his comfort but he shakes his head, lips curling into a sad smile. "That's exactly what I'm worried about." 

 

Niall feels the hairs at the back of his neck stand up in surprise, his eyes growing wide in pure shock and for a moment he's happy as hell but then he knows it's only going to make tomorrow even worse. 

"W-What?" He could not have heard what he thought he just heard. 

Zayn shakes his head, smile softening as he averts his eyes. "You heard me, I know you did." 

The blond nibbles at his bottom lip, eyes trained on Zayn's hands that lay on top of one another on the table. He thinks about him and Zayn; how they have two choices, and two only. It's just too difficult to pick which one is the right thing to do. 

He's torn between wanting their goodbyes to be passionate – along with it being the painful memory of each other – or wanting to leave in silence, so their last memory of each other is hurtful enough to forget. 

So far, Niall is leaning towards the latter option. As fun as everything was, way too much has happened between him and Zayn. There is a possibility of the older lad returning his feelings but the words are lost in silence, trapped in his thoughts and Zayn's locked it all up and thrown away the key. 

Niall knows he isn’t wrong though. He can tell that Zayn was lying about him being insignificant and being treated like other fans. If there were other people like him, Niall would have read about it in an article somewhere whilst crying into his ice cream (he was always pretty jealous whenever articles about Zayn and pretty females were released). He _knows_ the way Zayn treated him was of another kind. 

How could he not notice the gentle touches and soft smiles; the fond glances and light laughs, the _protectiveness_. Niall had acknowledged it, but never accepted it as anything beyond being friendly. 

It was probably around the day of the second concert that he became aware that there was something there, as much as Zayn will deny it. He was so furious when he called Niall, complaining about an empty bed and then later buying Niall pizza under the name of 'Zack' and then even later when he couldn't find Niall in the crowd. How quickly he forgave him was also a pretty big give away, and it was only until after the sex that Niall realised that the sexual festivities happening between them were just to cover up his affections.

 

"Niall?"

 

His voice is enough to make any man weak at the knees, thus why Niall stutters a little as he slowly slips away from his reverie. "Y-Yeah?" He mutters, blinking wildly. 

Zayn looks frightened for a moment, hesitant as he slides his hand under Niall's and brushes a thumb over his knuckles. "Since it's the last night..." He trails off, glancing around the room nervously. "Would you like to accompany me to my bed for just one last time?" 

That is probably the classiest way to ask someone to have sex with you, Niall feels honoured. 

Their first time had been immensely passionate so the blond can’t help but wonder what tonight's events would hold if he agreed. He grins, nodding his head and squeezing Zayn's fingers. "I'd love to." He whispers, anger gone, but it’s loud enough for Zayn to hear. As much as Niall wants to say no, he can’t help himself from wanting to do something worth remembering just one last time.

 

 

They leave the pub shortly, hand in hand whilst making sure none of the guards saw them, knowing very well that they would follow them up to the room and the boys wanted nothing more than privacy at that moment. Especially in that elevator. 

They bump into a couple of fans just after they slipped out of sight out of the bar and Zayn was kind enough to agree to a few photos. Niall offers to take the picture of the two of them with Zayn but the taller fan shakes her head. 

"We want you in it as well." She explains shyly, an accent similar to Niall's but thicker. She looks a little embarrassed when Niall flushes, "Oh, um. I really don't think–" 

"Come on, Ni." Zayn encourages, curling a hand around his waist and smiling along with the fan on the other side of him. "Make some memories, yeah?" 

The blond briefly glares at him before succumbing to the two girl's' wishes and standing next to Zayn. The darker lad can't help but smile down at him as the taller fan counts and Niall smiles his biggest grin. She snaps the photo, but Zayn isn't even looking. 

"Can we take another one? Zayn wasn't looking, sorry." She looks sheepish but Niall assures her that it was okay, briefly pinching Zayn's hip in annoyance. 

They take it again (this time with Zayn actually staring into the camera, though his arm looked very cosy around Niall on this one) before the fans switch places and look at the pictures together. Niall quickly turns to Zayn with a raised eyebrow. "Can you get any more obvious?" 

The singer just chuckles, nodding his head. "Only if you want me to be, babe." He huffs out with his arm still around Niall. 

"They're gonna post that photo on twitter and it's going to create more hysteria, y'know?" 

Zayn hums in response but he doesn't seem to care. It's like he wants everyone to know, and Niall isn’t sure if that was a good thing. 

The one who previously held the camera then stands on Zayn's left while Niall remains on his right and as the other fan takes the photo, the blond feels the hand on his hip slip just the slightest. His smile falls as he feels it slides down to cup the curve of his arse. 

Luckily enough, when Niall checks the photo later, it doesn't look that obvious as his smile isn't completely off his face. But Zayn, however, has this huge smirk on his that makes Niall groan when he sees it. The fans just giggle and quickly disappear after they hug Zayn goodbye, leaving the two alone once more and allowing Niall to slap Zayn in the arm. 

"You're _infuriating_." Niall growls under his breath, his actions contradicting his words as he accepts Zayn's hand again. The older man leads him to the elevator wordlessly, not even replying. They let go of each other as the sound of screams get louder, the glass window allowing them to be visible as they wait for the lift. 

Zayn turns and waves awkwardly at them, Niall chuckling. "You look so uncomfortable." He mumbles to the older lad, hands in his hoodie pockets. 

Zayn just snorts, nodding his head. "It's something you never get used to," he lifts his shoulders lazily in a shrug, turning to Niall with a smile lacing one corner of his lips. It stays like that as they continue to wait and Niall can't help but notice. "What?" 

"You look cute in my clothes." is Zayn's answer. 

The blond feels pink bloom his cheeks before his hands fall out of his pockets, frowning deeply. He's been wearing it the whole day and he feels so selfish not giving it back so he starts to unzip it, not wanting to wear it any longer.

Zayn's hands stop him, pushing his own away and re-zipping the zipper until it hits the very top, pinching Niall's chin afterwards just because he can. He looks disappointedly at Niall, but there's also a glimmer of affection in his eyes as he shakes his head. 

"I tell you you look cute in my clothes then you start taking 'em off. Are you an idiot?" He breathes out. The blond can't help the grin that spreads across his face as he laughs. "No. I'm _Niall_."

 

—

 

**@blouberry:** _hORAN GUY ALERT HORAN GUY ALERT_

  

**@1DUpdatesIRE:** _Louis, Liam and Harry are at the bar and so were Zayn and Niall. They took pictures with a couple of fans then left._

**@1DUpdatesIRE:** _Apparently Zayn and Niall snuck off somewhere. (via_ **_@inside1D_ ** _)_

**@1DUpdatesIRE:** _ZAYN AND NIALL WERE SPOTTED TOGETHER. The fans outside can see through the doors of the hotel and say they're standing waiting for the lift._

**@1DUpdatesIRE:** _People outside the hotel say they can hear some hardcore giggling inside._

**@1DUpdatesIRE:** _APPARENTLY NIALL'S WEARING ZAYN'S HOODIE (via insider)_

  

**@bottomharry_pls: _@1DUpdatesIRE_** _THIS IS GETTING RIDICULOUS_  

 

**@junkiebudszouis: _"@1DUpdatesIRE:_** _People outside the hotel say they can hear some hardcore giggling inside._ **_" @zaynmalik @craicalaic_ ** _explain yourselves_  

 

**@tompayno:** _niall is the girl in every 1d het fic he the real mvp_  

 

**@zaynsational:** _to zerriie shippers everywhere, niall has rode zayn's dick, where is your god now_  

 

**@liampiano: _@zaynmalik_** _so apparently you're gay now and I'm regretting every second of my life i didn't love you_  

 

**@graffitizayn:** _IM NOT SURE IF I WANT TO KILL NIALL BE NIALL OR BE ON NIALL_  

 

**@hazberryshake:** _"ziall" [pours shots of vodka]_  

 

**@midnightfuckery:** _Is it raining on my face or did Niall just win the dick game_  

 

**@honeybunharry** : _Relax guise, zayn only fucked niall bc he looks like Perrie :)))))_

  

**@peppermintlou:** _IF IT WAS A GIRL I WOULDNT BE THIS SAD BUT NOW I CANT EVEN CLIMB HIS DICK_

  

**@liamcame:** _the people who don't ship ziall are gonna struggle in life bc its real af okay get with the winning team hoe_  

 

**@halalzayns:** _now tf am I gona do with this fuckin weddin dress_

  

**@zainintheass:** _i can't believe people are shipping zayn malik with a GROUPIE ..._

  

**@ziall:** _i live with no regrets_

 

 

—

 

A family exits the elevator as the two part, ambling into the lift and pressing their button for the seventeenth floor. Niall's grinning as he turns to Zayn and Zayn doesn't even have enough time to ask why because as soon as the doors close, Niall's pulling him forward and kissing his lips. 

Zayn emits a hum of satisfaction, palms wandering up Niall's sides as their mouths melt together. Their tongues tangle together while pale hands slide down from the back of Zayn's neck to his chest, Niall playing with the hem of the neckline on his tank top. 

The blond moans, fingers grasping the collar of his flannel before tugging him forward and pressing Zayn against him closer; the older man chuckling a groan of his own into his mouth. 

As he cups Niall's cheeks, the blond sucks on his lip eagerly, putting every ounce of emotion he's been concealing into the kiss and earning a gratuitous growl of his name. 

The kiss is liberating; like a weight has lifted from Niall's shoulders as he traps himself into their own little bubble, out of the world's way. The two lose themselves within each other, swarming each other with the warmth that they diffuse from the heat of their bodies touching. They let their feelings escape through their lips, their tongues confessing the things that they wish they could say, but circumstances protest otherwise. 

 

Neither intended to fall so hard, but neither can help themselves either.

 

Zayn has grown a hate for cupid ever since he met Niall, viewing the valentine cherub as nothing more than a demon for shooting him with a poisoned arrow. Niall is his poison. How can he love who he is supposed to love if the time they spent together was too little? If the love they offered each other was reciprocated too late? 

The whole situation is enough to make Zayn's insides explode with conflict, his mind at war with his heart as they both fought to decide what the right thing to do was. But the way Niall's lips mould with his own have his ears refusing to listen to anything but the cry of his heart, it's rapid beating a soulful symphony that symbolised their internal needs.

 

Zayn knows what he wants, and it was Niall. He didn’t need to listen to anything else. 

 

The younger is the first to pull away, nose brushing Zayn's as his eyes remain closed. He lets out a shaky breath, letting it fade into an overwhelmed chuckle before he opens his eyes. Niall finds Zayn's own pair gazing into his own and smirks lazily up at him. 

"Well, that was nice." 

Zayn smiles, nodding in agreement. "It was." 

They feel the elevator come to a stop before they quickly notice it’s on the fifteenth floor. They hurriedly pull apart and smile kindly at the three people entering and make way for them, moving towards the corner of the lift. The three friends, consisting of two girls and one boy presumingly all in their early twenties, acknowledge Zayn but don't ask for a picture with him, luckily enough. Niall isn’t looking for a repeat of what happened earlier. 

They make small talk up until the seventeenth, where Niall and Zayn hop off after a wave goodbye. They seemed nice.

 

 

The two lads head down the hall before they appear at Zayn's door, Zayn cursing as they stop just in front of it. "Fuck." 

"What?" Niall wonders. 

"I forgot I left my keycard with Paul, and he's all the way back down at the bar." He looks sheepish, and it makes Niall warm inside. 

"Do you not have the key to any of the boys' rooms? Or any room?" Niall suggests, watching Zayn search his pant pockets and coming up with nothing but his phone and a packet of something Niall doesn’t know. The blond would investigate further but he can't get over how distraught Zayn looks, scared and nervous as if their whole night is ruined. 

"Don't be sad." The blond nudges him lightly, "The night is still young, we have plenty of time to do stuff." 

His words are seemingly futile because the older lad continues to frown, brows furrowed together as he bites his lip, looking deep in thought. Niall assumes Zayn's trying to wrack his brain for ideas but he's coming short of none. 

It hurts Niall a bit, how he can't cheer Zayn up and his mind flashes back to something Harry said. The first time he met Harry, Zayn had been jealous. He was quick to get better though because Niall had engulfed his small self around him, by the instruction of Harry Styles, and so at that moment, Niall can’t think of anything that can cheer Zayn up better than a good hug.

 He walks up to Zayn and embraces him, head tucked under his chin and his arms squeezing the middle section of his torso; Niall's ear is pleasantly met with the fast thrum of Zayn's heartbeat. 

"What are you–" he doesn't finish, freezing as Niall clings onto him. The blond nuzzles his nose along Zayn's collarbone, "You'll think of something, don't worry. You're the smart one." 

Zayn chuckles and it causes his chest to vibrate, the younger smiling into his shirt. "Niall you're–" he pauses, breath hitching loud enough for the blond to draw back and look at him. Triumph flashes across Zayn's face as he cups Niall's cheeks. "An absolute genius." He breathes out before kissing Niall firmly on the mouth and pulling his hand, dragging him back to the elevators. 

"W-Where are we going?" Niall stutters, overwhelmed by Zayn's surge of happiness. That kiss was also pretty powerful as well, practically punching the oxygen straight out of his lungs. "One of my favourite places." Zayn tells him, immediately sending Niall's mind into a frenzy. 

His brain searches through every corner of his mind, thinking of everything he's ever read about Zayn's favourite places and coming up with nothing. It proves something to him, though; makes Niall realise that you could be the biggest fan on the planet, read everything ever published by them – get fucked by one them, ahem – but you'll never really get to know what the boys are really like unless you're a close friend. Obviously, Niall is not hence why he doesn't know where the fuck Zayn is taking him. 

Zayn takes notice of his bewildered silence and chuckles as he pulls him back into the elevator, skimming his lips against the blond's cheek as he gutturally whispers against the corner of Niall's mouth.

 

"You ever been in a tour bus before?"

 

—

 

They take the elevator back to the lobby, deciding to quickly run back to the bar – there’s no point in sneaking off anymore – to grab the bus keys from Louis, who Zayn said doesn’t like sleeping in the hotels. 

"Why?" Niall had asked. 

"It's just nice to get away from all the madness, y'know? Not that hotel rooms are wild or anything," he chuckles along with Niall. "The bus is quiet and you're alone and stuff. Louis and I use it the most I think. I don't know, it's just cosy." 

Niall seems to deem that a reasonable answer as they jog past the fans once more and head back to the bar. They get there quickly before splitting up in search for Louis, Niall heading towards the bar while Zayn searched the crowd. 

Niall can see a variety of people, but Louis is not one of them. He stands on his toes, searches through the many heads but comes up short. He sighs in frustration as he looks back over to where Zayn was, seeing Paul with him. And he looks pretty mad. 

Zayn had his hands in his pockets and he’s laughing like it’s nothing, shrugging and replying short answers to whatever Paul is aggressively asking. Niall chuckles, walking towards their direction before a familiar figure crashes right into him. 

"Oof, woah there, Niall. Take it easy, lad." He laughs merrily, holding Niall's elbow even though the blond didn't have anything to drink. 

"Louis!" Niall exclaims over the noise, grabbing the older boy's shoulders. "Me and Zayn need keys to the bus, do you have them?" 

Louis pats his pockets and grins as he finds them, dangling them in the air with his index finger. Niall smiles and reaches for them but Louis tugs them away. The blond frowns. 

"What are you and Zayn planning to do in good 'ol bus one, eh?" He quizzes, brow raised suggestively, smirk curling at his lips. Niall narrows his eyes at him, his arm lowering. 

"Nothing." He coughs. 

"Nothing?" 

"We're just gonna chill, talk..." He trails off, discreetly coughs "cuddle" before diverting his eyes elsewhere. Louis seems unconvinced. 

"Mhm, _riiight_." 

Niall's lips tug down into a small pout. "Louis, please. I'll buy you a pint or sommin..." 

The brunet looks interested in his offer but he just holds the keys in his palm, smiling softly at Niall as the younger stares confusedly at him. "Take them, but promise me something." 

"What?" Niall doesn't know if he should be scared or not. 

Louis sighs, twirling the keys around his finger while looking thoughtfully up at the lights. "Zayn isn't as strong as he thinks he is. He wants to protect, but he also needs protection. He's an emotional one, but he just doesn't let people know." He rambles, leaning against the bar. The look on his face turns fond pretty quickly though, and when he looks over at Niall, the blond starts to feel like this is the beginning of an interrogation. 

"You, my dear Niall, have erupted some sort of connection with my fellow brother; and there's nothing wrong with that, I have nothing against what the two of you have." He tilts his head to the side sheepishly. "I actually happen to think that you two are quite cute." 

"Thanks." Niall flushes, suppressing a grin that was bound to emerge on his face. He keeps it hidden though, sends the electric impulses of happiness into his heart and letting it play a funky beat beneath his ribs. 

"However," Louis' eyes flicker darkly, a stern look on his face as his smile slips. "I _am_ against him or any of my best mates getting hurt, and as doubtful as you might feel about hurting Zayn, you've actually caused a lot of pain in him that you don't know about." 

Niall's face falls, the pace of his heart slowing as the air in his lungs is sucked right out. 

"I have?" He remembers the night before, when Zayn left and came back smelling strongly of weed. Niall was right, he _was_ with Louis. 

The older nods at him, sympathetically squeezing Niall's shoulder. "Don't be sad about it though, it just goes to show how much of an effect you have on him." He quietly comforts, words familiar to Niall's ears. "Clearly the both of you are hurting but I guess along with current circumstances, the conflict the both of you are having was inevitable." Louis mindlessly rambles, pulling a face as he clicks his tongue. Niall wasn't aware Louis could be so intelligent and protective, it's a whole new side that Niall feels honoured to have now discovered. 

"Still." Louis clears his throat. "Zayn's my brother, and I want you to promise me that you'll do your best to keep him happy. His sadness is a rarity but when it's there, it's awful." 

"I will." Niall promises. "I'll try my hardest." 

"Good." Louis grins, dropping the keys into Niall's palm. "Don't really think you need to try too hard, actually. Have you seen the way Zayn looks at you when you smile? _Jesus_ , he's a goner." 

Niall finds him blushing wildly at that, because _no_ , he did not notice that at all. But he's sure he'll start to. 

Louis chortles at his reaction. "Have fun. But not too much fun, though." The older suddenly grimaces, "The rest of us have to ride in that thing tomorrow. Don't wanna see stains or any of the furniture broken, okay?" Niall feels like a small child being told off, he wasn't aware Louis Tomlinson could be this intimidating. Because of that, Niall unintentionally mutters: "Yes, sir." 

Louis laughs, eyes going crinkly before he slaps him on the back. "We'll see you at breakfast."

 

—

 

Niall keeps Louis' words in mind when Zayn finds him and asks him if he got the keys. The blond nods a quick yes before they're jogging back out again, taking the elevator down to the car park. Niall gulps a bit when he sees how dark it is, squinting a little as he firmly grasps the sleeve of Zayn's shirt. The older guy merely chuckles, rubbing circles into his back before leading him to a sleek and shiny modern bus. 

Niall whistles under his breath. "Jesus." He gasps as Zayn unlocks it. 

They climb up the stairs and head inside, revealing a much larger interior than Niall expected. Though he should have guessed it was going to be this luxurious, they are _One Direction_ after all.

"What d'you think?" Zayn says, turning on a few lights and leading Niall deeper into the bus. The very front is a small lounge with a fridge on one side and cupboards on the other. The next thing they pass are their bunks, fairly large but Niall can see how cosy it is and he holds back the urge to jump inside Zayn's and try it out. Besides, they'll probably christen it later. (The blond blushes at the thought). 

The very back of the bus is a little like the front except it stretches from Niall's left to his right; it’s much larger and plenty more glamorous considering it has a tv and some gaming consoles. It’s like Niall has died and went to heaven – the second and less fabulous version, because his first heaven is with Zayn. He’s with Zayn right now though so both of Niall's heavens are clashing together and it's all _too much_ and there's so much he wants to do but with so little time. 

"Snazzy." Is what Niall chuckles out before he seats himself next to Zayn on a beanbag on the floor. 

Zayn laughs along with him. "It really is." He says quietly, intently eyeing Niall as he shuffles closer to him. 

Niall knows what he's wanting but he acts oblivious for a moment, eager to see how Zayn would react if he played stupid. "It's quite warm in here." He glances around the room, fighting back the urge to lean in and kiss Zayn's face off. 

"It is." The older agrees, leaning on his elbow and biting his lip. "Maybe you should take some stuff off, y'know, cool yourself down." 

Niall couldn't help the cackle that leaves his lips, shaking his head as he plays with the ripped fabric on the knees of his jeans. "I don't think so, Malik. Besides, you're the one wearing layers. Why aren't you taking anything off?" 

Zayn's eyes glimmer with mischief, sending a sharp spark of pleasure down Niall's spine when he sits up and strips off the flannel and throws it aimlessly to his right. His eyes don't even break their gaze and it makes Niall shudder, not knowing if he can act oblivious any longer.

 

Zayn smirks. "Your turn."

 

Niall doesn’t even want to take turns. If Zayn just plain asks him right then and there he will ripped every article of clothing off of his body and thrown them all on the floor before letting the predator feast on his prey. 

As much as he wants to ride Zayn's dick into the sunset, his hands stay sane and slowly unzips Zayn's hoodie off his body. If Niall was standing, he's sure it would have looked like a full on striptease but he’s not so he just looks awkward, uncoordinated and unattractive when he chucks it over towards the couch. 

Zayn raises a brow, confidently yanking the black tank top over his head and throwing it away randomly, shirtless now. He watches the blond boy expectantly and Niall bites his lip, stifling his laughter before taking off his shoes. 

"You're such a _shit_." 

Niall just laughs at him, loud enough for it to echo in the bus and powerful enough to send Zayn's heart into a mini frenzy. 

"I'm practically giving you a strip show here and you're takin' your shoes off, like.." Zayn shakes his head, makes a funny face that has Niall's head falling back. "It's unfair!" The older complains. "Give me something more." He begs with a pout. 

"Well, sorry not everyone can strip as sexily as you can." The blond rolls his eyes. 

Zayn looks at him, disbelief clouding his features. "Reckon you'd give me a good show if you tried." 

Niall gasps, offended. "I _am_ trying, for your information." 

"Oh really?" Zayn scoffs, whipping his phone out and swiping his thumb across the screen a few times before a slow sensual tune is playing and Zayn's resting his phone on the floor by his knee. "Go on then. Prove it." 

Niall opens his mouth to say no but he remembers what day it was and how it's almost two in the morning. He's amazed he isn't sleepy and he's even more amazed when he stands up and starts unbuttoning his jeans. 

"Please keep in mind that I do not know what the _fuck_ I'm doing." He nervously gnaws at his lip, slipping his fingers into the insides of his jeans as he salaciously sways his hips. 

Once Niall gets into the feel of the music, he begins to tug the dark denim down and past his boxers. He turns around slowly so Zayn can have a good view of his ass and he looks over his shoulder, batting his lashes as his jeans slide down his thighs. Niall hears Zayn humming in approval and can see him palming at his jeans. 

"I beg to differ Niall," Zayn chuckles disbelievingly at him, shaking his head with his eyes wide. "I think you've done this before." 

Niall bites back his laughter as he struggles to get the rest of his legs out of his pants. Hilarity quickly bubbles up inside of him and once he tumbles over and onto the carpeted floor, he doesn't even bother fighting back the cackle that erupts from his throat. He's red in the face and his hands are still holding his jeans but his knees are in the air and he can't breathe, he's heaving with laughter. Only he would do something like that during such a sexual moment. 

He's still laughing when he feels Zayn pull his pants off the rest of the way, so he's now just left with his t-shirt and boxers. He's rolling on the carpet, breathlessly giggling to himself before he feels someone crawl in between his legs. Niall's chuckles fade and a warmth begins to spread all over his body as a toned, shirtless chest comes in contact with his clothed one. 

Niall hums in content when lips latch onto his neck and firm hands grasp his hips. The blond falls pliant in his hold, resting an arm loosely around his neck as he lets himself cave into the tantalising tickles of Zayn's tongue on his collarbone. He chuckles softly before it breaks out into a blissful moan, his back arching just as his jaw drops at the way Zayn presses the ever so prominent bulge he had in his pants against Niall's boxers. 

Blood quickly rushes down to his nether regions and he finds himself bucking up into Zayn, his wrists pinned above his head as plump lips are roughly pressed against his own. Niall shakily moans into his mouth, whining when he pulls away. Zayn keeps his mouth open, laughing airily at the way he eagerly chases after his mouth. 

"Wait here, yeh?" He says before hopping up onto his feet and walking away, leaving Niall alone panting and hard. He can feel the head of his dick sticking to the fabric from where his precum stained the front of his boxers and he groans, annoyed but not for long because Zayn quickly returns. 

It's what Niall saw him yank out of his pockets earlier along with a lighter, and Zayn looks a little nervous as he urges Niall to sit up and next to him. "Have you ever smoked a joint?" 

Niall shakes his head. People at uni did it and he'd been offered many times but the thought of smoking amongst strangers gave him discomfort. He stares at the joint thoughtfully, biting his lip. He's always been curious about it and the thought of getting high with Zayn was something he's fantasised about. Though he was a little smoother in his dreams, a lot sexier too. 

"What's it like?" Niall questions curiously, scooting forward so that him and Zayn's knees are pressed together. Zayn smiles, playing around with his lighter. "It's quite nice. The high doesn't last as long as when you smoke weed but…" He trails off and it has Niall frowning, seeing the words that Zayn willed himself to suppress.

"What?" Niall pushes. Zayn just smirks, flickering the fire and lighting the end of it. "The best feeling, I'd say, is when you come while you're high. That shit feels sick, I'm not even joking." He laughs, taking a hit and fluttering his eyes shut. Niall watches him let the drug rest in his lungs before blowing out bright white smoke into the air. When Zayn slowly blinks his eyes open, Niall's shuffling even closer. "Okay. Okay, I want to." 

Zayn passes him it and watches him closely. "Just press it to your mouth, breathe it in – slowly – then wait a few moments and blow it out." The blond nods before following his instructions, feeling a heat flow down his throat and he could immediately feel it in his chest and in his head. It wasn't a strong feeling, but Niall felt a little hazy straight afterwards when he blows it back out. 

"Shit," Zayn curses, spreading his legs and letting Niall's calves rest over his hips so they were pressed chest to chest; their hard ons once again grazing each other. Niall whimpers as he takes a second hit, feeling everything slow down when Zayn ruts against him and steals the joint back. "You sell yourself short, Ni," he takes a hit and blows it towards their left, the blond blinking at him slowly and tracing soft kisses down his jaw. "You do a lot of things you swear you've never done but you just end up being great at it, like, how does that work?" Zayn quizzes as he huffs to himself, tracing circles on Niall's rib with his free hand. 

"I don't know." Niall breathes, feeling the outline of Zayn's dick thrust agonisingly slow against his and he squeaks a bit when Zayn holds the joint in front of his mouth for him. The blond chokes a little on it at this point and as much as it contradicts what Zayn began to say, the older continues. 

"Louis reckons you're just the best human being." Zayn whispers as Niall hums. The blond's clinging onto his shoulders and rolling his hips onto Zayn's cock, unaware of what is actually being said until Zayn cups Niall's jaw so the blond hears every syllable. "And I completely agree with him." 

"You do?" Niall grins as the older takes a languid hit. Zayn just nods, tracing his thumb softly down Niall's bottom lip and letting the boy's mouth gape open just the slightest before long lashes fall against tan cheeks. The world almost silences at the intimate moment as Zayn breathes the drug straight into the boy's mouth, their movements stilling except for the release of Niall's lip. The blond feels a ripple run down his spine as he arches into him, his eyebrows furrowed as feels the sensational heat make its way into his lungs, swarming his chest. 

"Shit, Nialler," Zayn barely whispers as he softly grazes their lips together, dropping the joint and letting their bodies press and their tongues collide. "You're so fucking hot." He groans as Niall practically breaks his zipper just to get to his dick, his bulge shamelessly standing out in his boxers. 

"Mm, you too." Niall mindlessly compliments back, letting Zayn yank the shirt over his head and onto somewhere on the couch next to them all the while briefly wondering why they aren't doing this on the sofa. It'd probably be a lot more comfortable but he's too far gone for Zayn to do anything about it. 

He loses track of what's happening next because next thing he knows is that they're both naked and are shotgunning to the point where Niall can't feel anything but Zayn in his lungs. He's sure the other lad wasn't a drug but at that moment Niall can’t find a better label for him, classing the way his lungs tighten with the need for no, not oxygen – his need for _Zayn_ and how his head is infiltrated with nothing but thoughts of him as the unreal high that that (now binned and abandoned) joint was supposed to give him. 

Niall's overwhelmed and extremely out of it, wondering briefly if the pleasure Zayn’s giving him was legal because it felt so nice to grind against each other; can't help the noises that rip from the back of his throat when Zayn's literally lodged inside of him later on. 

There’s a finished joint chucked into a bin, their clothes strewn everywhere and it smells of something along the lines of sex, sweat and a little something else. 

The blond is clawing at his back, yearning for more and wanting him to go faster but the pace Zayn is going at is too good for Niall to beg him to change it. He's snapping his hips with full force but sliding out slowly, it's pleasurably annoying and Niall wouldn't have had it any other way.

The blond isn't so gone that he didn't do a little of the work as well, meeting Zayn in the middle when he uses his thighs to bring himself up before gradually slowing back down just as the other lad's canting his hips off of the carpet. It punches these small "ungh"'s from his mouth that got even louder once Zayn lay him down on the floor and pulled out. 

Niall's eyes open in annoyance, whining at the loss and how empty he feels but he scrambles up on his elbows when he feels a tight warmth encompass his throbbing dick. He falls back, releasing the most guttural moan. 

Zayn's got his forearms resting on either side of Niall's head and he's gyrating his hips in such a way that Niall swears he fades out of consciousness for a moment. Delicious chuckles are flowing into his ear while he's mumbling a mess of words into the older boy's neck, obviously taken aback by the turn of events. "Zay–" 

"Shh," the lad hushes, raising the blond's wrists above his head just like earlier and allowing himself to do all the work; to cause all the pleasure. "'S the last night, just thought I'd do something you'll remember me by." He raises himself before bouncing quickly, a pace that made Niall more vocal than he was before. Zayn obviously stretched himself out for this shit, he fucking _planned_ this.

 

At this rate, Niall is never going to forget.

 

The blond has no control, not with how tight Zayn is around him and how intensely close he is to busting a nut right inside of the lad. He wills himself not to though, wanting nothing but for this to never end. 

Hell, they didn't even use a bloody condom tonight but Niall is too lost in the way Zayn is riding him to even worry about everything his teachers and parents warned him about. 

 

Sadly, Niall can’t handle the tightness any longer. Zayn lets out his loudest moan as he feels hot spurts of come inside of him, igniting a heat that sent tingles throughout the blond's whole body as his head pounds with the most insane intensity. It isn’t long before Zayn's shooting his own load on Niall's chest and getting some on his chin, feeling the very same satisfying numbness spread from his head to the tips of his toes. 

Zayn slumps beside Niall, tired but pleased. Niall's come begins to dribble out of his hole and he moans a little due to the sensitivity, the blond sitting up and frowning a little before adjusting himself into a position where his mouth was fully latched onto the dusty pink muscle of Zayn's hole. Niall licks up the small river of white that streams down the older's ass before lapping up the rest, lightly sucking out the remnants of their good time and swallowing with an appreciative hum. It tastes quite nice. 

Zayn sighs, muttering his thank you before he politely asks Niall to fetch the wet flannel that’s in the bathroom next to the kitchen. The blond obeys and stands up, struggling for a minute before he smiles at the way he's able to straighten his back. He takes his first step and winces at the strong pang of pain in between his legs, the smile dropping off his face. Niall pushes himself and he manages to get the wet flannel and come back with only wanting to cry _twice_ – so that's an achievement in his book. 

He throws the flannel onto Zayn so the boy can use it to wipe himself, Niall crumbling onto the soft carpeting next to him before he's passed the damp rag as well. They lie like that for a few minutes before Niall turns to Zayn and lays his arm across the boy's stomach, nuzzling his nose along the older's neck. Niall can't remember, but he doesn't think they've ever cuddled while on their stay there. Tonight was clearly a night of many firsts for them. 

 

Zayn releases a frustrated sigh that Niall notices quickly, the blond tilting his head up a little the same time Zayn's arm curls around his waist. "What?" 

"Tomorrow," is Zayn's answer.

Niall doesn't want to hear the rest of it. " _Shut up_. I'm not crying after we just fucked, okay, I'm more manly than that." 

The older lets out a chuckle but Niall can sense small traces of sadness in them, sadness he is eager to avoid. 

"We'll get through this, don't worry." The blond comforts. "Can we?" Zayn sounds doubtful. 

"We can try." 

The older lad hums fondly, carding his fingers through Niall's hair with the hand that was previously resting on the blond's hip. "Well aren't you a ball of sunshine." 

Niall smiles as a warm pair of lips peck his, surprising him just the slightest and causing him to stutter on what he was going to say. He pauses, breathing an overwhelmed sigh. "I could say the same for you." He chuckles. 

"Aww, Nialler." Zayn coos, ruffling his hair. "Why do you have to make this so hard for me?" The smile slightly slips from his face as he says this, Niall returning the expression hesitantly. 

The carpet is nowhere near comfortable but they’re too exhausted to move. Niall is holding onto Zayn as if he’s afraid someone is going to steal him away and Zayn has his own firm grip on Niall, but the difference is that Zayn _isn’t_ afraid. Sure, they’re parting from one another and yes he’s going to get a stern talk from their management, but he knows as much as he'll miss Niall and what they had, he's just glad it happened. He isn’t scared, he’s thankful. 

"Are you blaming me?" Niall asks in faux offence. Zayn just laughs. "Yes, this is all your fault, Niall. You're the one who took the elevator to the wrong floor." 

" _You're_ the one who told Preston that you knew me." 

" _You're_ the one who didn't say anything about it." 

"Yeah but _you're_ Zayn Malik, I wasn't going to pass that opportunity, was I?" Niall scoffs as if it’s obvious, wriggling out of the older's arm and propping himself up on his elbow. "Besides, didn't have much of a choice – I was starstruck, so I was completely out of it. And you are my favourite, so." 

Zayn smiles up at him, placing an arm behind his head. "While we're on this topic, can we please discuss your 'Directioner' self?" Niall cringes at the name but nods along anyway, squirming a little on the floor. "Can we go somewhere more comfortable though? Like the couch? The floor's killin' me." 

The older nods and sits up, pulling Niall along with him as they both struggle to stand. They're a mess of naked limbs and giggles before they're finally on their feet and Zayn's leading them into a direction that’s not their sofa. Zayn heads back to the bunks and swipes the curtain open, urging Niall into the fairly large bunk that just about manages to fit the both of their bodies in. Once they’re back to the cuddling position they were in before, Niall wiggles his eyebrows at him. "This is intimate." 

"Oh yeah." Zayn agrees with a light giggle. "I'm guessing that's another fantasy I've helped you fulfil?" 

" _Shut up_." 

The older snorts, letting their legs tangle together as he petulantly says: "No, and c'mon. You have to tell me stuff about yourself." 

Niall thinks about it before his mouth is opening and he's speaking once more. "When you say tell you stuff about myself do you mean all the reasons why I was absolutely head over heels for ya?" 

Zayn bristles. "Was?" 

The blond's then rushing to correct himself. "No, I do! I still do. But. Just in a different way now." His answer has Zayn's cheeks warming up. 

"What do you mean by different?" 

Niall doesn't know if he has the vocabulary to express what he feels. From now ever since the very first time they slept together, Niall's feelings have done nothing but flourish in the most inexplicable way. It continued to evolve the more time he spent with Zayn, and right now, the feeling is coursing its way through his veins faster than Niall has ever felt it go. He clears his throat to explain. 

"From the beginning, it was just like the usual fan-loves-bandmember feeling, y'know? Like I was in love with you, but I wasn't _in_ love with you. At least, not like what I'm feeling now." 

"It's only been a few days," Zayn reasons, looking amazed and Niall swears he’s about to cry. 

Niall just smiles, shuffling closer and letting his fingertips trace imaginary patterns onto the wings of Zayn's tattoo. "I think you're forgetting that I've kinda loved you hardcore for the past three– almost four years now. There really wasn't any other way but to fall harder."

Zayn doesn't have anything to say, feeling a little special and he doesn't know if it's because of what Niall said or if it's just Niall in general. He has to admit that he isn’t at the level Niall is because they're still practically strangers but all he knows is that he feels _something_ for Niall; and that something is a really funny fluttering in his stomach when Niall smiles. It’s the increase of the pace of his heart whenever the blond touches him and it was that strong pang in his chest when he woke up to an empty bed that day.

 

He doesn't know _what_ it is, but it's something.

 

"Wait, is that weird – like, is that not normal, oh my god, I–" Niall's anxious rambling comes to a halt after Zayn erupts into high pitched laughter. His eyes crinkle wildly and all Niall wishes for was to capture that perfect moment on camera. 

"Can I just say," Niall begins in the most shy and quiet voice. "That you really are everything and nothing like I expected." 

Zayn smiles wider and holds Niall tighter against him, an earthquake between his lungs. "Explain it to me, Ireland." 

The blond giggles at the name before he thinks for a beat and presses a kiss to Zayn's adam's apple. "First time I met you, when you took me to your room, you were a quiet, egotistical asshole. The morning after, you were _still_ an egotistical asshole–" 

"Wow, _thanks_ Nialler. My heart is swelling–" 

"Let me finish!" The blond whines in annoyance, pinching Zayn's nipple and laughing at the way he winces. 

"Did you just pinch my nipple?" 

"Yes, now shut up. Anyway," Zayn pouts but Niall ignores him. "You told me I could sleep in your room and you offered – well, more like forced me to go to the early bird entry and if that wasn't shocking enough, I also met and got followed by Liam." The blond beams but Zayn doesn't particularly look happy. Niall's smile falters and he places a soft hand on the older boy's cheek. "Don't look at me like that, he's not the one I'm with right now." 

Zayn snorts, lips tugging into a smirk. "Never thought I'd ever be so happy to meet a fan that didn't like us all equally." Niall just laughs, shrugging his shoulders while he pulls a face. 

"If I did, I don't see the problem. We could have a huge fivesome orgy or something – Harry seems willing." 

"No, no, no." Zayn rushes out, shaking his head, his hand sliding down to rest on Niall's hip. "I don't want you going off and leaving me for some polyamorous sexual relationship with my bandmates, nope, that is _not_ happening." 

"I'm not leaving you..." Niall whispers, smiling down at the older boy's lips in amusement when he sees them curl up. That's secretly what Zayn's been wanting to hear ever since their first concert but he knows that the following morning contradicts that, they both knew. "…I'm not leaving you unless you join us!" Niall finishes and the smile drops off of Zayn's face. 

"I hate you." Zayn grumbles but they both know it isn’t true. 

"If you hate me then you wouldn't be here." The blond whispers smugly but his tone is soft and affectionate. Zayn can feel that spark ignite in him once again. 

"I could say the same for you." 

It's silent for a few beats and Niall can't help himself when he leans in and meets Zayn's lips with his own. The kiss is slow and it makes them both smile, their tongues grazing each other, like they’re both shy to go further. Niall slides his fingers through Zayn's hair and balls his hand into a fist to keep him there, smirking at the surprised groan Zayn emits into his mouth. Zayn's hair has grown extremely long these past few weeks, and all Niall could think of was playing with it and to fist his fingers through it – long hair on a guy was something he's never not loved. 

"By the way," Zayn draws back, breaking free from the kiss. "That asshole thing was, ugh, just an act. I don't, umm…I only do that because most people seem to like it. So, sorry about that." Niall frowns and feels Zayn's fingers brushing his jaw. _Zayn Malik uses techniques to pull groupies into his bed._ Niall feels scandalised but relieved. "I'm not gonna lie and say that I didn't like it because it did turn me on and annoy me to some level. But. You stopped acting like that, so it’s okay." 

Zayn relaxes and Niall feels the need to hold him and protect him from the world's negativity. He thinks of Louis' words and squeezes Zayn's waist a little. "You're not an asshole, Zayn. You can be, sometimes–" Zayn rolls his eyes. "– but you're really sweet." 

"Thanks, Ni. You too." The older smiles warmly.

"I mean you bottomed for me, like, that is _so_ cute– _you're_ so cute. Awww, Zaynie." Niall coos and aggressively pinches his cheeks, the other lad groaning and pulling the blond's hand away. 

"Are you still high?" He questions, cheeks going numb. From smiling or from Niall’s pinching, he doesn’t know. 

"No, I'm _Niall_." The blond giggles. 

Zayn rolls his eyes, smiling anyway. “I like how you say your name.” 

Niall hums. “I like how you say yours!” He grins, “But I like how you say my name better.” 

“Niall.” 

The blond snorts. “Zayn.” 

A shiver rips through the older’s spine. “ _Niall_ ,” he moans. 

“Oh, _Zayn_..” Niall breathes out the way he did when Zayn had him inside him earlier. 

“Are you asking for another round, Horan?” He questions, entertained but willing. The blond is beaming widely at him, clearly enjoying himself but all of Zayn’s amusement disappears after Niall answers his question. “Oh, yes, _Zack_. Please?” 

"Shut up." Zayn groans out loud, rolling over so he’s above Niall and resting himself on top of the younger male. The blond squirms under his weight and opens his mouth to say something but Zayn throws his hand over his lips to muffle whatever he was going to tell him. The blond just pouts into his palm – not that Zayn can see it, but he can tell with the way his blue eyes widen. 

“I’m just gonna sleep on you.” Zayn mumbles tiredly, their stomach’s smushed together while Zayn rests his head on the blond’s shoulder, their legs laced. Niall whines into his hand but the man on top of him just laughs, eyes closing shut. Niall continues to murmur something into his fingers even though Zayn’s blatantly ignoring him in favour of sleeping but it doesn’t stop him from rambling into his palm. 

Zayn sighs, lifting his head and tiredly blinking down at Niall with his hand still over his mouth. 

“Babe, why are you talkin’ to yourself?” Niall comically raises his eyebrows before angrily mumbling into Zayn’s skin. The older chuckles before apologising and removing his hand. “Sorry, what was that?”

Niall shakes his head, face sheepish. “I wasn’t actually saying anything I was just aggressively muttering jibberish.” He laughs quietly. “It sounded funny...” 

Zayn shakes his head, dropping his head back to its place on Niall’s shoulder, hooking it over and fluttering his eyes shut against the pillow. He breathes slowly into Niall’s hair, lets the blond trace circles into his hip. Niall then sighs, humming _Half A Heart_ under his breath and looping his right arm, the side where Zayn was slowly drifting off, and wrapping it around the older’s neck. 

Niall’s humming has Zayn slowly beginning to slip into a slumber but Niall abruptly stops and he whines and squirms above him. The blond laughs, wraps his left arm around Zayn’s neck so they were fully tangled together. Niall even goes so far as to rest his thigh over the singer’s waist. 

“Keep humming.” Niall manages to make sense of what Zayn’s muttering into his neck, tickling him with his breath. He laughs, evilly giggles; “No.” 

“I hate you, so much.” Zayn groans, and Niall can tell he’s awake by the way his lashes are tickling his neck. 

“I hate you too.” The blond grumbles. “Like, why the fuck didn’t you guys add that song to the setlist I was– am _still_ fuming.”

 “We couldn’t fit everything in. Quite a few of us wanted it but we had to keep the singles.” Zayn explains, voice laced with fatigue but Niall would do anything to drag this moment out a little longer. “Was that your favourite?” The older asks. 

“Not my favourite, but something that should have been played live.” Niall argues, nuzzling his nose into Zayn’s neck and breathing him in. He’s just as tired as Zayn is, but he doesn’t want to be. “I should’ve made a petition, ‘specially with all the followers I’ve gotten recently. Would’ve made ya sing it.” The blond laughs weakly, yawning a little. 

Zayn hums confusedly. “What d’ya mean recently?” 

Oh yeah. Niall hasn’t told him, and he doesn’t think Zayn’s checked his twitter in a while or checked it enough to know what was happening. “The fans found my twitter just today and it’s proper blowin' up, like a full on war goin’ on in my mentions!” Niall sighs, annoyed. “The photos have probably spread right about now as well – those ones with the fans and the one where I fell outside.” 

Zayn snorts. “That fall was awful, Nialler, what did you even trip on? Good thing I caught you before you hurt yourself.” He looks down at him eyes scanning his face, in search for what, Niall didn’t know. 

“Nothing! I tripped on _nothing_. What is wrong with me?!” The blond whisper yells in disbelief, staring at Zayn with confusion in his features. 

The older rolls his eyes but a smile grows on his lips, leaning back down on Niall’s shoulder as he mumbles his response. “That’s completely normal for you, though.” The comment has Niall smiling, how Zayn has come to terms with his clumsiness bringing him some weird form of satisfaction. Niall just really likes how much Zayn’s learnt about him in the span of a few days. 

“And about the fans,” Zayn yawns. “What have you tweeted to them so far?” 

“Told ‘em they found me and replied to this fan who was apologising for some people not givin’ me privacy.” He whispers, shuffling under Zayn’s body. They’ve been in that position for a while and he’s starting to feel numb. 

“It was obvious anyway, I post selfies and everything. They’ve all probably gathered all of that and made sense of the rest.” 

“I’m sorry, babe.” Zayn whispers. “I’d tell you to ignore them but I know how hard it is.” 

Niall huffed, “You weren’t helping either…inviting me into the bloody photo and pinchin’ my arse. The fuck were you thinkin’ Malik?” He can’t help but feel a little pissed with him. As persuasive as he had been, the aftermath is knowingly going to be pure hell for Niall. If he had a busy life like Zayn did, maybe it would be way easier to forget everything but no. He’s a fan, and he doesn’t have a life and all he does tweet is about them, or derby, or food. But mostly them. And derby. 

“I’m sorry.” Zayn says and he sounds genuinely upset that it has Niall’s heart breaking. The blond rolls them over so he’s on top and rests his chin on his hands, which lay on the older’s chest. 

“It’s fine, I mean…we hadn’t had a photo together so it was nice, I guess.” 

Zayn’s eyes blow wide, suddenly awake. “We don’t?” 

Niall eyes him weirdly. “No…” He shakes his head. “Why?” 

Zayn raises himself up on his elbows and takes a look around his bunk, which is filled with so much junk, Niall now notices. It has everything. Clothes, sweet wrappers, boxers…but apparently, not what Zayn’s looking for. 

“Where’s my phone?” He curses. Niall rises so he’s straddling Zayn’s hips as the other lad searches. The blond makes sure to keep his head low to prevent him from smacking it into the low ceiling above. He frowns as Zayn almost looks panicked. 

“Zayn, what are you doing?” 

“We’re gonna take a pic together but I can’t find my phone – fuck, it’s probably back in my jeans.” He looks so pissed at himself. 

Niall bites at his cheek, placing his palms flat against Zayn’s chest and pushing him down so he can stop fidgeting. 

“We can take it tomorrow, calm down.” Zayn doesn’t look pleased. 

“What if we forget?” He scowls and Niall frowns, shaking his head determinedly. 

“We won’t. I’ll make sure we won’t.” 

Zayn sighs tiredly, drops his head back into the pillow and allows Niall to rest himself back on top of his chest. 

“But we look good right now.” He complains like a child. If they were standing up and wide awake, Niall’s sure Zayn would have stomped his feet like the baby he is. 

“We’ll do it first thing in the morning, then.” Niall reasons, brushing hair out of the singer’s face and placing a kiss on his jutted lip, attempting to kiss his pout away. It works, but not well enough. Niall just gives up and places his ear right above Zayn’s heart, listening to the soothing melody of his pulse. 

The momentarily silent is broken, the older carding his fingers through Niall’s hair and sighing. 

“Keep in touch, yeh? DM me, text me, tweet me. I don’t know, call, facetime. Anything.” 

Niall grins with his eyes closed. “You’re so eager to communicate.” 

Zayn huffs out a short chuckle, shrugging his shoulders. “Yeah, yeah, I know. I’m cute.” The blond cackles, smile wide as he bobs his head in agreement. The older lad just pats at his back. “Just don’t pinch my cheeks again.” 

“Or else what?” The blond challenges. Warm fingers then come down to grab a hold of his bum, Niall squeaking in surprise. He wasn’t expecting that. “Or else I’ll pinch yours.”

 

Niall gulps, “I think that’s a pretty fair deal.” 

Zayn gently laughs, humming in approval. “Definitely is.” 

 

They can hear the screams outside but it’s muffled. It has Niall briefly wondering if anybody heard their screams from inside the bus. He’s sure they were pretty loud, but then again, maybe the noises they made were nothing compared to the colossal amount of noise the fans were making. Niall’s quite amazed that they’re still there. The first day, not many people were present but each concert, more and more attended and the groups multiplied. The blond guesses the word must have spread through the internet and all these people were just doing anything in their power to catch a glimpse of the boy band or to meet them. Niall would do the same. 

He wonders if tomorrow they’ll still be there to say goodbye to them. Niall doesn’t even know what time the boys are leaving but all he knows is that his dad is heading his way over here before noon and that he needs to be up and ready to go by then or maybe even earlier.

He’s very much aware of how he will never be ready to say goodbye to them, not after all the fun they’ve had together. Niall and Zayn mostly, but Niall has had some undeniably incredible moments spent with the other boys. He’s not even sure if he can go to sleep tonight because he’s too scared; he’s had the time of his life here and he doesn’t want to leave it all behind to go home. He has to return home then he has to drive all the way back to his uni the monday after next week which is all the way in Maynooth – which is a 35-40 minute drive – and Niall really isn’t in the mood to do work for a while. He needs a good few years to recover from what he’s experienced. 

And _Zayn_. God, he’s gonna miss Zayn and his voice, his laugh. Niall’s gonna miss the way Zayn delicately traces his fingertips along his face, his skin, much like what he’s doing right now. He’s gonna miss the way Zayn rolls his eyes and acts all big and bad but all he really wants is to hold or be held. Niall’s never going to forget the time they’ve spent together so far and he’s pretty much disgusted by the thought of never seeing all four of them after this. Niall’s wondering to himself what the point was of fate bringing all five of them together and then never letting them meet ever again. He doesn’t want it to finish like that, and he’s praying to every deity it doesn’t. They couldn’t have all experienced that together only for it all to end so abruptly when it seems like everything was only just beginning. 

Niall remembers Zayn’s words at the bar and he hopes the lad’s meeting with management goes well and whatever action they take upon the whole “groupie drama” isn’t as harsh as Niall is expecting it to be. They’ll probably release some photos of Zayn and Perrie together at Zayn’s house with his family or something, make him skip some sort of event just so he appears “madly in love” or some other weird form of fuckery that fools everyone. Like it always does.

 

Despite how shit everything is, no matter whatever the fuck happens afterwards, Niall isn’t going to ever regret the past four days they’ve all spent with each other.

 

 

He doesn’t even realise he’s crying until Zayn’s hands are running up and down his back and his hair, soft lips pressing against his temple as he rests Niall back on the bed and on his side before tugging him into his chest. “Z-Zayn...” The blond whimpers, voice muffled by his own hands as he tries to wipe away his own tears. It infuriates him, how his mouth forms the words they both want to hear but his throat won’t let him emit anything but pathetic cries. Zayn shocks him by infiltrating the quiet with a silky, comforting tone, understanding Niall even though the blond hasn’t elaborated. 

“I know, I know.” The older whispers into his ear softly. “I do, too.” 

Niall’s glad Zayn understood him without him having to say exactly what he wanted to, because he knows Zayn would never actually be able to say it back. The singer’s response is of another form, but Niall accepts it anyway.

 

–

 

Niall wakes up alone, much to his disappointment. He lifts his head up from the pillow and blinks, feels no warmth in his arms or around him – it feels wrong. His mind wanders back to that time he snuck out to get to the queues early and Zayn yelled at him through the phone, not knowing where he was. He wonders if this is what Zayn felt. 

The blond slumps in the blankets and furrows his brows while his eyes remain closed. Niall buries his nose in the fabric and grins, the pillow smelling strongly of Zayn. His happiness doesn’t last long though. As he opens his eyes, he remembers where he is, what happened the night before and what day it was. 

 

26th of May, Monday morning.

 

He’s frowning into the fabric, stark naked in Zayn’s bunk and by the time said owner of the bunk returns, he’s already decided that he isn’t moving. 

Zayn sighs as he stares at him after pulling the curtain open. He doesn’t want to have to do this, but they both knew this was inevitable. “Come on, Ni. Get up.” 

“I don’t want to.” Comes the blond’s tired answer. He doesn’t know what time it is, but he hopes it isn’t past noon already. 

“It’s seven in the morning,” Zayn says, like he’s reading his mind. Niall turns his head to him and sees him staring down at his phone, typing a text out to someone before meeting Niall’s gaze with a sad smile. “We’re getting breakfast, then...”

 

He doesn’t bother finishing the sentence.

 

Niall huffs, sitting up and weakly sliding out of the bunk, still naked. He ignores the way Zayn shamelessly stares at his nude frame and continues to the very back of the bus. He rubs at his eyes before scanning his surroundings, smirking at the way their clothes were randomly strewn everywhere. Niall walks over to pick up his boxers but he groans when he sees a small wet stain at the front from his precum, not to mention the stench of it. 

“Zayn?” He calls out. He gets a muffled reply and he guesses the lad’s in the bathroom. “Can you lend me a pair of your boxers?” He asks before wandering towards the couch where his shirt was. Lifting it to his nose and sniffing it, he makes a disapproving sound low in his throat. “And a shirt?” His only response is a high pitched laugh. 

Niall gathers the rest of his clothes, his pants seemingly one of the few things that weren’t either stained or smelt of illegal substances. Zayn comes out of the toilet later on, freshly clothed with a shirt and boxers hanging over his arm that he gives to Niall with a small smile. The blond returns it thankfully before he slips them both on.

 

 

They finish getting changed around half past, and Niall just stands there, looking around to see if he has left anything before turning to Zayn who stands near the entrance with the same sad smile he had on when he woke Niall up. 

"You ready?"

 

Niall doesn't think he ever will be.

 

But still, he lies. "Yeah," he breathes, and the look in Zayn's eyes is a good enough indication that he would've lied as well. 

It's silent for a minute, Niall taking in the sight for one last time and once he turns around, he sees Zayn standing right in front of him. The older boy's lip quivers but he still smiles strongly as he opens his arms. Niall doesn't hesitate walking into them and resting his head on the older lad's shoulder. 

Zayn sighs, curling his hands around Niall's sides. "What I'd give to spend just a few more days like this…" 

The younger squeezes his eyes shut. "Shut up, oh my _god_." He shakily breathes, squeezing Zayn's waist and hiding his wet eyes into his neck. "Don't make this harder than it already is." 

"You tearin' up, babe?" Zayn chuckles, amused. He then curses, "Shit, it'd be even worse with the boys 'round, later." 

"Thank you _so much_ for that reminder." Niall grumbles, pulling away from him but Zayn's hands are on his shoulders and he's got a genuine smile on his face this time. "You promised me a selfie first thing in the morning." The darker lad giggles quietly, his camera already open on his phone.

 

Niall laughs at the irony. "You a big fan of mine?" 

"The biggest."

 

Zayn raises the hand that he had his phone in and tugs Niall close to him, the blond not being able to hold back a smile at how eager he was. He looks at the screen and notices his eyes are a little red and he huffs, displeased with his appearance.. " _Zaaayn_ , I've just cried I can't take selfies." 

Zayn rolls his eyes fondly, camera still up as he stares down at Niall. "Your fault for gettin' all emotional, mate." Niall gasps, offended. " _You're_ the one making me cry!" 

The boy teared up quite a bit, Zayn noticed, remembering that one time on stage when he'd turn to see Niall crying during _Moments_ or any other slow song they played. 

He smiles down at the boy, "You look amazing, it's for myself anyway. Not like I'm gonna let anybody else see it." 

Niall raises a brow. "You sure?" Zayn nods and it makes the blond sigh, puffing his cheeks before reaching for Zayn's phone. 

"Fine, but I'm taking it. I gotta get my good angle in."

Zayn quietly snickers to himself about how Niall didn't have a bad angle at all but it's ignored as they stand next to each other, smiling at the camera. He has his chin hooked over Niall's shoulder, their cheeks pressed together as they both flash bright white grins. For people that’re previously upset, they certainly don’t look it.

 

When they look back on the photo, Zayn isn’t even staring at himself, too lost in the dimples in Niall's cheeks and the blue in his eyes. Niall looks amazing, just like Zayn’d said. The blond doesn’t look at himself either, his cheeks flushing at how beautiful the man next to him was and he’s absolutely fucking ecstatic that he was able to capture his beauty on camera. Words could not express how lucky he felt to have all this happen. 

They looked so happy together, you almost can’t tell from the photo that they might not ever see each other again. 

Once the photo's taken, Niall quietly cheers to himself, laughing and before he can even realise it, Zayn's pulling him in by his waist and kissing him right on his mouth. It’s forceful and Niall is taken aback by how firmly Zayn's lips come in contact with his but he kisses back nonetheless, getting lost in the taste of Zayn's tongue for a beat before he remembers the phone in his hand and he – without looking – takes a picture. Then another and another.

 The multiple shutters go off loudly but Zayn doesn't pull away until after he presses a finishing peck on Niall's lips what seems like minutes later, smirking at the boy before scrolling through his Camera Roll. He chuckles at the photos, some blurry and some clear and some just perfect. He keeps them all. 

"You've got some good photography skills, Horan." He shows him one that was captured at the perfect moment. Niall had his eyes closed and his brows furrowed but his mouth was open and his tongue was just brushing Zayn's. The blond hums in approval, pointing out how long Zayn's lashes looked before exaggeratedly fanning himself. "You've got some good _face_ skills, Malik, how do you do it?" 

"Was kinda born with it," Zayn snorts, "And it seems you were, too." 

Niall huffs out a laugh, muttering a thanks before Zayn pockets his phone. "Y'know…I kinda just stole you away without actually knowing if you have anyone back home in…Mullingar, was it?" Niall nods, snorting. Like anybody would like him over there. 

He plays along anyway. "That's true," he shrugs innocently. "I know about your supposed love life but you no clue of mine." The blond smirks. 

Zayn slits his eyes at him, glaring minutely at the boy before they start making their way outside. "No one better come steal you away.." He mumbles quietly to himself but Niall hears it and it has him beaming. 

"I dunno, Malik. I know some pretty fit Irish lads back at uni." He's _lying_. Nobody can compare to Zayn. 

The older lad scoffs, obviously pissed off. "Honestly hate you sometimes.." He whispers and it has Niall chortling. Zayn is a jealous and very moody person, and Niall really likes to tease him about it. "Hate you, _too_ ," Niall sings.

 

—

 

Breakfast is loud. And Niall loves it. 

It’s the first time he's eaten with the lads and it’s really fun. Harry eats like a classy gentleman, using a knife and fork to cut his sausages while Louis criticised him through a mouthful of cereal, some milk dripping down his chin whilst Liam laughed at them. Niall took note of how fond Louis was of Harry despite being sarcastically annoyed at how the younger – yet taller – lad was always so polite. Niall could tell that there was a little somethin'-somethin' there and he minutely forgets that Louis has a girlfriend. Or does he? 

Niall doesn't question it. He stays quiet and eats his bacon before placing his hand atop of Zayn's which is rested on his thigh. Smiling up at the older boy, Niall lets his head fall onto his shoulder and sighs happily at the kiss delivered to his forehead.

 

Today is the worst day ever.

 

—

 

They have to go back to their hotel rooms to retrieve their luggage, Zayn offering to carry Niall's but the blond denies him; tells him he can take care of himself while simultaneously thinking about how the next few days (years, months, etc.) it's going to be just him, no boys. Niall has to go back to his old life of scrolling through his tumblr or twitter and his boring days at uni. 

"UGH." Niall grunts childishly as they get into the elevator with Harry, who laughs quietly and nods. "Me too, Ni." 

Niall weakly smiles at him before turning around and resting his forehead on the birds on Harry's chest. "Take me with you, Harry. _Please_." The taller lad snorts, ruffling Niall's hair. 

"N'aww, it's okay. You'll be okay." He soothingly comforts the blond, giving him a good hug. 

Zayn stares at the two disapprovingly, arching a brow before gently taking Niall's free hand in his. "Yeah, you'll be fine, babe. Just keep in touch, yeah?" Niall only nods and stays where he is, Harry's arms still around him. This sparks a heat in Zayn’s chest, huffing and rolling his eyes as he lets go of Niall's hand. It causes Harry to smirk while his eyes remain trained on the ceiling, Niall tapping Harry's elbow in acknowledgment as he snickers into the lad's chest. Making Zayn jealous is _really_ funny. 

The darker lad glances at them two or three more times before he lets out a loud, annoyed grunt, Niall finally lifting his head at the sound to smugly grin at him. A grin that Zayn fucking despises. He’s fully aware it’s all on purpose but fuck Niall and his cute face. 

The blond stares at him with affection, eyes crinkling as he smiles at the way Zayn has his arms crossed over his chest, face angled away from both him and Harry. The two guards that are stood in front of them snort knowingly, reminding Niall of their presence and he shoots them a little smirk. He turns back to Zayn and pokes at his rib but the lad doesn't even flinch. He stands in front of him and he sees Zayn's eyes glance towards him but only briefly before turning back to look at the wall. 

Niall shakes his head, releasing a fond sigh. "I'm gonna miss you so much." He mutters before allowing himself to crawl under Zayn's crossed arms and letting them wrap around his shoulders, Niall squeezing the other's waist. Contradicting his jealousy just a mere few seconds before, Zayn lets out a breathless chuckle, melting into the blond's embrace. "I'll miss you, too."

 

The elevator stops and they pull apart at the sound of screams slipping through the gaps of the doors that slowly slide open.

 

Niall puffs out his cheeks tiredly, turning to Harry. “Where’s Liam and Louis?” He asks as they all step out of the lift, the cheers outside quieter than last night. Niall doesn't blame them, he isn’t a morning person either. 

“Right here.” Liam chirps, a tired Louis beside him yawning with a little wave. They all seemed unfazed by the shouts at first but then someone shouts Louis’ name and his face lights up, turning to them and smiling wide. It has Niall beaming but it doesn’t last for long. 

Paul approaches them with a weak simper. “Talked to the man that ran the place and he said there was too many fans outside to get rid of so they’ve just been trying to contain them and keep them quiet. Bad job, if I do say so myself. Explains why they haven’t decreased at all, they’ve camped here for a week. ” He rolls his eyes, checking the watch on his wrist. 

“Are we leaving out front then?” Louis questions, hood up over his head as he blinks slowly, Niall can see he’s still eager for some sleep. 

Paul shakes his head, “The vans are coming in about fifteen minutes and the man I talked to said he’d clear up the path to the back exit. We can slip through there and get out without difficulty.” 

Niall frowns. He texted his dad to come pick him up around the same time he finished breakfast, which was around eight forty five. It’s almost ten now, him and Zayn having wasted some time fooling about in their hotel room and they may or may not have made out a bit too. His dad hasn’t called or anything so Niall isn’t sure if he is already there or not and he makes a habit out of checking his phone constantly. 

Paul leaves after discussing some other stuff to the boys that Niall wasn’t paying attention to and a silence descends amongst them once he’s gone. Niall locks his phone, seeing that all eyes were on him. He smiles up at all of them but he knows what’s gonna happen; is hyper aware of what they want to say but nobody actually comes forward and says it. 

Zayn’s the first to break, arms open as he launches himself at Niall and engulfs him into his hold. Niall laughs wetly into his shoulder as he feels tears build in his eyes. 

“Zayn, the fans…” Niall whispers but the lad doesn’t budge, merely squeezing him tighter to show how much of a shit he gives 

“Oh for god’s sake, fuck what anyone thinks, Niall.” Louis rolls his eyes, falling into the embrace and sandwiching Niall from the back. “It’s just an everyday.. _goodbye_ hug, between lads. Yeah?” He struggles saying it normally and Niall can hear his voice waver at a certain word. The blond hums in agreement anyway, feeling the air in his lungs being punched out even more as Liam and Harry join in. 

“Aww.” Liam coos. “Look at us.” He mumbles against Niall’s hair. 

“Like a happy family.” Harry dreamily sighs. Being the tallest he practically towers over all of them and it has them all laughing, save for Zayn, who remains quiet, head buried in Niall’s shoulder. 

“It was a fun trip, Niall. Dublin’s a great place!” Liam says, smiling as he pulls away; Harry following after. 

“You think so?” Niall raises his head and blinks at them, eyes rimmed red with a smile softly tracing the corners of his lips. 

“Yeah, it’s real nice.” Louis agrees, bobbing his head as he also lets go. Zayn stayed pressed to Niall, saying nothing. The blond simply sighs, letting the lad hold him because he doesn’t exactly know when “next time” was. 

“Wait, you guys left the hotel?” The blond furrows his brows. 

Harry sniggers. “Yes, we all did. Drove around a bit as well and we would’ve invited you if you two weren’t busy with each other...” He bounces his brows, nodding his head over to the current state Zayn was in. 

Niall smiles softly, gently placing a kiss against Zayn’s stubbled cheek. “Hope you enjoyed it here.” He whispers, not really knowing if the lad was going to reply or not. 

Zayn lifts his head and looks at Niall brokenly, eyes distant and a little pink, glassy with what seems to be forced away tears. The blond’s about to ask whether he was okay or not but Zayn stops him from saying anything by just grazing their lips together. It’s done so lightly it has Niall shivering, falling pliant in his arms and pushing forward, deepening the kiss eagerly. Whistles are heard around them and Niall senses some movement occurring but he doesn’t really pay attention, too busy getting lost in the languid motion of Zayn’s tongue. 

His hands wander to cup Zayn’s jaw, the palms on his waist tightening and it undoubtedly sends a tingle to his groin. Almost as if he knew, Niall feels Zayn’s lips tug up into a smile against his own, the younger not being able to fight back the giggle that built in his throat. 

The kiss is different to their very first. It’s slow and gentle, lazy. It isn’t rushed or too heated, almost like they have all the time in the world when really, they have none. 

Niall’s phone rings in his pocket and it causes their lips to disconnect. Zayn draws back, eyes still closed before he blinks them open, accompanied by a breathless sigh. Niall scans his surroundings bewilderedly, seeing the three boy’s flushed faces as well as their formation. They’re stood in a line and Niall supposes it is to keep the prying eyes from outside away. The blond is suddenly very grateful, finally answering his dad’s call. 

“Hello?” 

“Mornin’, Dad.” 

“Yeah, Niall, I’m outside now, ugh...” He sounds nervous. 

The blond scrunches his brows. “What’s wrong?” 

“Have you gotten everything ready? Please say you do.”

“I do, yeah, I’m in the lobby right now.” Niall feels himself flush at the way Zayn stares at him, eyes keeping track of all his movements. “Are you okay?” Niall asks and it may or may not have been aimed towards both Zayn and his dad. The older chuckles, nods his head but the boy’s dad answers a little differently. 

“Um, I don’t know? I’m– well, I’m quite scared actually.” 

“Why?” 

“I’ve never seen so many girls in one place in my whole entire life, son. That’s why.” 

 

God bless Bobby Horan. 

 

“Don’t worry, Da, I’m on my way out.” The blond weakly smiles at all the boys before grabbing the handle of his suitcase, backpack slung over his shoulder. “Fantastic, I see you. Did you have fun?” 

Niall grins, “Best days of my life.” He breathes, eyes falling on each one of their faces. He sighs shakily. “I’ll be right out, yeh? Just.. lemme say goodbye to some people.” 

“Ah, you made friends?” 

Niall bites his lip, eyeing one lad longingly. “Yeah, I guess.” 

“That’s fine, just please make it quick. I feel like fresh meat in a lion’s den.” Niall cackles out a laugh before nodding his head. He replies a yes to his dad before he hangs up and hugs each and every one of the boys individually, starting with Harry first. 

“I love you, take care!” He was a little more composed now, really seeing no reason to break down into tears at this point. Harry nods, squeezing him. “You too, Ni.”

 

Niall moves over to Liam and sighs happily as muscular arms wrap themselves around him. He smirks a little. “Thank you for following me.” The older chuckles, waving his hand and saying it wasn’t a big deal. “Love you, Payno.” Niall says, whining when the lad ruffles his hair before Louis tugs the blond into a tight embrace, squeezing his lithe body. 

“I’m gonna miss you, you cute fuck.” 

Niall laughs into his neck and nods, “I love you too, Louis.” He smiles up at the oldest when he gives him a peck on the forehead and a pinch on his cheek (the ones on his face). “Goodbye, yeah?” 

The brunet smirks at him and nods. “You know goodbyes don’t always mean we’ll never see each other again, right?” 

Niall crinkles his nose, smiling. “Of course.”

 

They pull apart and Niall stops at Zayn, staring at him for a minute. Takes a few beats to just take in all of his features before he hugs him one last time. 

“I think I’ll miss you the most.” Niall stage whispers so the rest could hear, the younger laughing into Zayn’s neck when he earns a bunch of offended “heeeyyyy”’s from behind them. 

The blond sighs, pulls back slightly to kiss Zayn’s pouted lip. “Don’t cry or I’ll punch you in the face.” He warns, rocking them from side to side before taking a hold of both of Zayn’s hands. He squeezes their fingers together and smiles, nodding his head. 

 

Zayn’s waiting for him to say it, all four of them were, but it doesn’t come. Niall's admitted it last night, but he's never actually _said_ it. And that's what they all were expecting him to say as a part of their final goodbyes. 

All four are left disappointed when the boy pulls away, Zayn keeping himself from reaching out to him and dragging him back in.

 

Niall turns on his heel and waves at all of them before grabbing his suitcase and wheeling it out. The whole band held the same shocked expression but none compared to the broken countenance Zayn wore. The sound outside intensifies at Niall’s presence and he smiles awkwardly as they shout his name, sheepishly grinning at his dad as the window rolled down. “Hey, Dad...” 

Bobby looks beyond confused, looking back and forth between his son and the screaming fans before shaking his head. “How do they know your name?” 

The blond shrugs. “It’s a long story…” He sighs, clicking his tongue. 

Bobby rolls the window back up, Niall laughing when he sees him rub at his ear after. The blond makes his way to the back seat and opens the door, struggling to throw his suitcase in but he manages anyway. He sighs as he turns around, blocking out all the things called out to him as he spins to face the hotel entrance. He gasps when he sees Zayn standing in front of him.

 

“Z-Zayn?” He stutters.

 

“Why didn’t you say it to me.” He doesn’t look mad, but his voice made it sound like he was. He just looks damage, and Niall suddenly feels like he’s breaking the promise he made to Louis. 

“Say what?” He doesn’t know what he’d done wrong. 

“You said it to all of them,” Zayn points his finger back to the three boys standing in the lobby, visible through the glass doors. “But not to me. Why?” 

Niall’s taken aback by the sudden confrontation and he looks around, noticing some fans quieten while others took pictures of the situation occurring. 

“Zayn, I– I don’t know, I’m sorry?” There’s this tightening in Niall’s chest and he doesn’t like it; he can feel the heat build-up in his stomach and there’s water starting to tingle in his tear ducts. 

No. Not now. He’s been so strong but he _can_ ’t break down now. 

“Say it.” 

Niall blinks at him, confused. “What?” 

“Say to me what you said to them.” 

Niall gulps, words falling short in his throat as he anxiously plays with the hem of his (more like Zayn’s – he kept it) hoodie. “I…I can’t.” 

Zayn’s eyes harden, jaw clenching as his fists ball. “Why not?” 

“I just–” He pauses, his heart beating rapidly in his chest. “I can’t, Zayn, I need to go…” 

“If you leave without telling me why then I will never forgive you.” Zayn grabs his wrist. It doesn’t hurt, but the flare in Zayn’s eyes makes Niall feel like it was supposed to. “Now tell me why.” 

“Because,” He breathes, eyes glassing over. 

Zayn growls. “Because _what_ , Niall, god fucking dam–” 

“Because if I say it to you it wouldn’t be the same way as when I said it to them!” Niall blurts out, eyes releasing fresh tears and he’s suddenly thankful for the screaming surrounding them. He can hear people telling other fans to shut the fuck up while others continue to grab the attention of the other three who’re stood at the door, Paul by their side. He hopes nobody’s heard, but then again, with this amount of people around them, someone is bound to. 

Zayn’s grip on his wrist loosens, the blond’s eyes falling on the way Zayn’s hand falls by his side. Niall sighs. “If I say it to you…it won’t be the same way, and– and it’s just going to make saying goodbye even worse. _God_ , you stubborn cunt, I was trying to make things easier.” He huffs angrily, smiling when Zayn chuckles before the older lad wraps him into another hug.

 

“I just wanna hear you say it,” Zayn pouts. “Is that not okay?” 

Niall exhales a deep breath, his chest already beginning to feel lighter. “It’s okay, yeah,” He nods, a pretty blush spreading across his cheeks as he draws back a little and looks up into his eyes. “I love you.”

 

Zayn smiles, glances down at his shoes before biting his lip. “Can you say it again?” Niall rolls his eyes, shaking his head and pushing him away. “Don’t make me say this when you don’t even feel the same way.”

 

Zayn snorts, slipping his hands into his pockets, staying quiet. 

Niall’s eyes widened. “Do you?” 

Zayn only shrugs. “Maybe one day,” He smirks. “If things go well.”

 

– – –

 

The drive home is silent and Niall has never felt this exhausted in his whole life. His dad looks worried, words at the tip of his tongue that he can’t form into a proper sentence. It’s almost ten minutes into the drive when he just decides to blurt it out. “Wasn’t that guy a part of the band you went to go see?” 

Niall nods his head amusedly and his dad looks even more confused than before. 

“How?” He questions. 

Niall shrugs. “Long story.” 

Bobby hums in response, “Are you going to tell me this long story or are we going to be silent through the whole of this hour long drive?” 

Niall laughs, turning to face the window before shaking his head tiredly, mind flowing back to his first night there.

 “I’m exhausted, Da.” He apologetically chuckles. “Maybe when we’re home.” He smiles sadly at the rain hitting the window as he goes over every little thing that happened that he could remember. He can feel his phone buzzing and he knows who’s texting him but he doesn’t have the strength to answer. 

He’s a little surprised when the buzzing stops so suddenly and he stares down at the device in his palm. He opens his messenger up and rolls his eyes at the group chat he was invited to.

 

**Unknown:** _Hiii .x_

**Unknown:** _I made this so we can all talk to Niall._

 

**Unknown:** _Heeyyy nialll_

 

**Unknown:** _let me sleep_

 

**Unknown:** _Sleep thenn mate lol_

 

**Unknown:** _Yeah, go to sleep._

 

**Unknown:** _SHUT UP !!_

 

**Unknown:** _Hahahaaaa_

 

**Unknown:** _No._

 

Immediately, he knows who all the messages belong to and he quickly adds all their numbers into his contacts. Harry, Liam then Louis.

 

Surprisingly, Zayn’s name is in the chat but he isn’t talking. Niall exits and searches his messages, noticing he’s gotten quite a few from Zayn but on a conversation that was only meant for the two of them. Niall guesses whatever he had to say he didn’t want to say in front of the rest of the boys.

 

**Zayn:** _hope you have a safe trip home bbe x_

**Zayn:** _wish you all the best to wherever you’re heading , call me nd shit yeh ?_

**Zayn:** _btw ..._

**Zayn:** _luv u 2 bae_

 

Niall rolls his eyes fondly, of _course_.

 

—

 

When they get home, Niall's exhaustion hits him all at once. He has to drag himself to the door while his father carried all his stuff as well as unlocking it. Niall feels a tad bit guilty but his father is a kind man, and he assures his son that it was okay and that he would be too if he went to three concerts in a row. Niall only grimaces, wondering if it was the concerts that tired him out or something else. 

His father ushers him inside his house and the familiarity and warmth of it all has Niall faceplanting his couch, his dad dragging his luggage upstairs. 

His mother comes rushing in, smiling at her son before she pinches his bum. Niall jumps and looks over his shoulder to see his mother grinning at him and he whines. " _Mum_ , 'm tired." 

"Oh shut up, you baby. Come give yer ma a good hug! I've missed you." She gushes, beaming when the blond complies and sits up to hug her. He tiredly rests his head on her small shoulder and closes his eyes. He really did miss home. 

"How was it? Was it fun? Di’ya see Zayn?" Niall chuckles weakly. He saw Zayn, alright. He saw him _real_ good. 

"Yeh, it was _amazing_. Cried so hard." He laughs, mind going back to just over an hour ago when he weeped into Zayn's arms in front of all those fans. 

"I'm happy for you," his mother pinches his cheek. Niall frowns, whining once more. This is probably what Zayn felt like. "Now go upstairs and get some sleep." She drags him to his feet and pushes him towards the stairs. "I'm expecting an explanation once you're awake!" 

 

Niall's eyes grow wide. "Explanation?" Did she know about…

 

Maura nods confidently. "Yes. I don't want any false stories, okay? Want to know exactly _how_ you got three grand and _how_ you put it into my bank account. No lies." 

Niall freezes as he's left at the bottom of the staircase, his mother returning to the kitchen to finish cooking and Niall doesn't even know where his dad's gone but can't even bring himself to care at this point. His phone buzzes in his hand, his last text to Zayn being: _I'm home now !! Yaaaay_  

He unlocks his phone, noticing his reply.

 

**Zayn:** _I'm at heathrow , we're waiting in the plane for clearance or some shit x_

 

Niall bites his lip, typing his response.

 

**Niall:** _You are such a fuckk !!_

 

**Zayn:** _??? Thanks ?_

**Zayn:** _Wait .._

**Zayn:** _Ohhh haha , yeh your welcome x_

 

**Niall:** _I'll pay you back ,promise !_

 

**Zayn:** _See this is why i kept it secret_

**Zayn:** _don't be such a pissbaby nd just let me take care of you_

 

**Niall:** _I don't need to be taken care of !!_

**Niall:** _I'll pay you back somehow_

 

**Zayn:** _Babe , you already have :)_

 

**Niall:** _???_

 

Niall waits a few beats and gets nothing. He sighs, making his way up the stairs before doing what he did with his couch. He faceplants his bed and sighs, hearing a soft buzz from his phone a minute later.

 

Niall unlocks it and grins down at the screen, seeing the selfie they took a while ago along with the multiple pictures Niall took of them kissing. He smiles, scrolling through each and every one and saving them all before he reaches the end, wanting to cry a little at the message under the attachment.

 

**Zayn:** _This is all the payment i need :) <3 x_

 

—

 

"So," Maura releases a shaky sigh, scrolling through her son's camera roll. "Zayn.. was the one to pay me back?" 

Niall bites at his nails, nodding a little nervously. He isn't sure if his parents are going to be accepting of this or not because they knew he liked dick, and they knew he liked Zayn. He just isn’t sure if they approve of him liking those two together in that context. 

Once he woke up, he had to explain to his parents at the dinner table what happened while he was away and he couldn't exactly lie to them so he told the truth; leaving just a few inappropriate details out. 

"I can't believe this," Bobby shakes his head, looking at the photos in shock. "Zayn Malik slept with my son." 

" _Dad_ ," Niall flushes. "We didn't just sleep together, it was more than that." He explains, taking his phone back and locking it. 

"And how do you know that? How do you know he's not just with you for the sex?" 

" _Maura_ ," Bobby gasps. 

"What? Have you seen Niall's arse? Many men would find that irresistible if they got a hold of it. His jeans don't do him justice." 

Bobby groans once more, crinkling his nose in disgust while the blond just slams his head down onto the table, mortified. He can’t believe his mother is discussing his behind at the dinner table. 

A silence descends after that and Bobby just looks scarred while Niall appears as if he doesn’t want to be there. Maura kept at the topic, "I'm being serious, Niall. How do you know he's not just using you?"

The blond groans, having no particular answer for that apart from a childish whine. He pouts at his mum. "If he's paying you back without even telling me about it don't you think that there's a little something there?" 

Maura humphs. "Point made." 

Niall doesn't bother eating after that. Instead, he scrolls through his mentions and groans at it’s contents.

 

 

**@tomlinsunshine: _@craicalaic_** _YOU ARE THE LUCKIEST MAN ON EARTH_

 

**@heartslirry: _@craicalaic_** _i don't think you fully understand how much everyone wants to be you right now_

 

**@mozarellarry: _@craicalaic_** _ARE YOU EVEN AWARE OF HOW MANY PEOPLE YOU'VE FUCKING UPSET_

 

**@blondstreakzee: _@craicalaic_** _you > perrie _

 

**@windowpayne: _@craicalaic_** _you fucking slam dunk'd each and every one of our asses_

 

**@strawberriam: _@craicalaic_** _HOW DID YOU DO IT HOW DOES ONE RIDE ZAYNS DICK_

 

**@lerrieedwards: _@craicalaic_** _you suck shit back off of zayn he belongs to perrie_

 

**@louptyloopmalik: _@craicalaic_** _WHAT DOES ZAYN //SMELL// LIKE_

 

**@hislittlethings: _@craicalaic_** _everyone's freaking out and you're probably gonna read this and not know what's happening_

 

 

Niall's mouth gapes into a small 'o', realising that it isn’t just because of what earlier today and that something has occurred. Something he _clearly_ doesn’t know about. He furrows his brows, typing something out.

  

**@craicalaic:** _Ughh , mentions are blowin up.. Anyone care to tell me wht happend ??_

  

He immediately gets a dozen responses, his phone freezing a bit but once it's working normally he sees a whole variety of replies. Some ask him to follow them while some send hate and others just continue to tell him how lucky he is. 

He then stumbles on one tweet saying: _Check Zayn's favourites ;)_ And so he does. A little hesitantly, he might say, because he doesn't exactly know what to expect. 

He goes onto Zayn's twitter profile and sees that the lad hasn't tweeted anything in days and that isn’t exactly abnormal so Niall proceeds to scroll down until he reaches his favourites. 

Niall curses a little when his phone freezes again and it takes forever for the page to load. 

"Niall, don't tweet at the dinner table." His mum scolds him, the blond looking up at her before rolling his eyes. He picks his plate up after slipping his phone back in his pocket, keeping it unlocked so it loads while he puts his stuff into the sink. Niall mutters a _thanks for the dinner_ to his mum before jogging back to his room, jumping on his bed. 

He takes his phone out and his chest tightens at the latest favourite. He clicks on the tweet and he gulps a bit, not being able to fight back the smile on his face.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

zaynmalik1D _favourited this_  

**@craicalaic: _@weedchester_** _i don’t have a boyfriend :(_

_  
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**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it. Because. I kinda wanted a sequel (???) but idk, it's up to you guys I guess. I've got a few ideas in mind hahah.. OH, AND MERRY CHRISTMAS !!


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